Child contact process and delays.

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

ok, update 2 weeks on.

Letter received from my ex partners solicitor (by way of mine). letter claims that CAMHS referal has been refused and contact is apparently going appaulingly bad.
Obviously the contact centre report will prove that contact actually went brilliantly but my big worry is that this report will be "forgotten" in court the same as last time which would mean my ex partners lies would go unchallenged yet again.

As far as the CAMHS referal i decided to call them, they explained all details of their acceptance criteria and agreed that my daughter should indeed be getting help from them. They went on to explain that they rely on information presented by parents and found it highly concerning that my daughters referal reason was stated as "court instruction with no underline symptoms". So this is something I can now act on.

Unfortunately it does look like i will not be getting another contact session until after 31st August.

If anyone at all can think of anything I could do please post, im rather lost at the minute, it seems my ex partner is free to fabricate events and is getting away with it all over again.

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

I spoke to my solicitor yesterday, I explained that I want to do everything possible to co-operate with them so he is going to arrange a meeting with them to "discuss" the report (which would mean they will have to send one before hand apparently). So many thanks for your advice on this one.

Had what was meant to be my final contact session today. Waited in the room for an hour, the centre manager then came in to tell me that my daughter and her mother were at the top of the road and my daughter wouldnt bufge so they told them to head home. Absolutely nothing at all i could of done unfortunately. I waited for the supervisor to return (who went up the road to speak to my daughter), she told me that mom was doing all the communicating and my daughter would not even say a single word.

So now begins the 7 week wait to return to court without any additional contact sessions remaining. I am able to send emails but as usual phone calls are not answered at all.

[leclerc]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

It is Cafcass, they are meant to attach a copy to their report when filing to the court but they failed to do this.
I have spoken to the contact centre about this and the centre manager informed me that it is actually down to Cafcass to get a copy sent to all parties.
I have been made aware that my Cafcass caseworker goes on annual leave ...... again for 4 weeks as of next week. When asking who will take over in her absence
I was kindly told that nobody would and I could speak to her upon her return which is 6th August 2012.

Are you or your solicitor going to make an official complaint? I know you want to keep them onside but your solicitor requires that report so perhaps the solicitor could be more forceful so to speak....

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

Is it CAFCASS that give you the supervisory report or Social Services?

It is Cafcass, they are meant to attach a copy to their report when filing to the court but they failed to do this.
I have spoken to the contact centre about this and the centre manager informed me that it is actually down to Cafcass to get a copy sent to all parties.
I have been made aware that my Cafcass caseworker goes on annual leave ...... again for 4 weeks as of next week. When asking who will take over in her absence
I was kindly told that nobody would and I could speak to her upon her return which is 6th August 2012.

[leclerc]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

Sorry its been a while guys.

I have now had a second contact session (which yet again went well). I now await the third and final session which is scheduled to take place this weekend.
So as far as contact is going, it cannot really go any better with all things considered.

There are however a number of things baffling me at the moment.

1: Cafcass have still not made the contact centre report avaliable to me despite requests from both me and my solicitor.
2: The next court date has been set for 31st August 2012. This is 7 weeks after the final contact session will take place.

Is there anything i can do about this at all ?

Is it CAFCASS that give you the supervisory report or Social Services?

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

Sorry its been a while guys.

I have now had a second contact session (which yet again went well). I now await the third and final session which is scheduled to take place this weekend.
So as far as contact is going, it cannot really go any better with all things considered.

There are however a number of things baffling me at the moment.

1: Cafcass have still not made the contact centre report avaliable to me despite requests from both me and my solicitor.
2: The next court date has been set for 31st August 2012. This is 7 weeks after the final contact session will take place.

Is there anything i can do about this at all ?

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

thank you once again leclerc, you are once again the voice of reason and your imput has proved to be extremely valuable.

As agreed I attended the contact centre today and .......... well you all know how it goes. My daughter was upset, hiding her face ect and I talk her round then we have fun and she doesnt want the session to end. A few minor differences this time round though. We actually made it upstairs instead of staying downstairs and Mother did not interfere at all (which may sound daft but it made the world of difference). My daughter explained that Mommy got up late "again" (her words not mine) so she hadnt had breakfast, she said this happens alot so we agreed that next time we would go up to the cafe (200m from the centre) and have breakfast together. This was agreed by me, my daughter and the supervisor but not my daughters mother (the supervisor then reminded her that we could in fact do this with or without her consent so she eventually agreed).

Just to note: this is the first contact session we have had that has gone well without the presence of my daughters baby brother.

[leclerc]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

FTW, glad things moved on and that the fact that your focus was on what is in the best interests of the child was taken into consideration. A further study recently has stated that the input of a father into their child's life can be paramount to their ongoing emotional health.
I think you had a good judge who clearly could see through the waffle of CAFCASS. Apologies if some people think they are wonderful but once you have dealt with them and seen the sort of stuff that they come up with first hand, then you will realise how badly that they can sometimes be.
I do think though that your ex does need to resolve the anger issues that she has with you because if she is like that with her child then she is damaging the child irrevocably and is not moving on with her own life and trying to be as a minimum, civil to you. I hope in the short term that the contact becomes better because the long term may be difficult otherwise....

[Hurricane Puffrose]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

I have NEVER been happier to read a post, a victory for common sense!!

Keep your head held high FTW, you have DEFINATELY earned the respect of every poster on LB!

Families Need Fathers!!!!

[Celestine]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

Oh wow, I'm so happy you had a decent judge who clearly saw through the CAFCASS laziness. Well done FTW, your patience and perseverance ARE paying off! :beagle:

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

puffrose your absolutely right. Cafcass hate the fact that I call them on it when they get it wrong. My ex doesnt like it that despite "possible" attempts, blocking contact is not working. I am getting there and with the CAHMS intervention the truth will be outed soon enough and that will answer my questions (even if they arent the answers i would like i will happily accept them from CAHMS)

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

leclerc, your comments actually partially sum up todays preceedings very well, and thank you for taking the time to post.

Chapperone suggestion was applied and point blank refused by the mother, Cafcass report was described as "a pointless sacrifice of nature" by the judge (which i had to contain my laughter). Mother refused everything completely.

So a little out of character the judge asked to speak with me directly (in the presence of daughters mother and both sides legal representation). I put my views of the situation over and explained what I felt the best interests of my child were and gave my reasons why. He applauded my patience given the "delays" I have faced and then moved on to other issues raised. Indeirect contact has been blocked for a number of moths and when this was raised my daughters mother unsuprisingly became very agressive and accused me of lying. It really was a shame when I pulled out itemised billing and proof of postage to prove my claim. It didnt go down well at all.

Next up was my "plea" to utlise CAHMS, the judge agreed it was a highly relevent aspect of safeguarding my daughters emotional well being and again showed his disgust for the Cafcass report. Once again daughters mother disagreed and once again she lost as the judge felt this could only offer positivity for my child.

Then the judge dropped a bombshell, Cafcass have not disclosed the content of the contact centre report to the judge or solicitors, as he felt the report was pivotal he ordered that contact continue at the contact centre with a view to expanding to "outdoor/ activity" based contact once he reads the report. CAHMS will now assist my child and indirect contact will alter to emails and telephone calls directly to my childs mobile number. The chapperone refusal was accepted by the judge but he emphasised the dangers of flouting court orders.

So a pretty good day, but Cafcass openly let us all down by not doing as they should. I feel it was only through diplomacy and the reputation I have earned through this long process that has prevented the case being thrown out today. Once the judge see's the contact centre report he will have the same picture in his mind as I do (hopefully)

[Hurricane Puffrose]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

I would suggest that you have a word with the new barrister and say can you suggest that my daughter is handed over to the staff at the contact centre and mother says having a coffee somewhere else?

CAFCAS to my mind dont do a great deal of anything much, and take sides, my sister's ex is a violent drunk and he gets unsupervised access to the kids as the contact centre wouldnt accommidate him!

Keep your head held high and be yourself, you have done nothing wrong in this matter, give the mother as much rope as she needs to hang herself!

[leclerc]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

I think you can bring up the supervisory reports and state your case. I think you have to focus on what is in the best interests of your daughter. That is the paramount thing in family law. It's not what is in the interests of you but of your daughter. Perhaps one suggestion might be and I emphasise might be, that someone neutral to the child brings her for contact so that any tension or stress that might be caused or perceived to be caused by it is removed. It's just a suggestion and unfortunately, a bit late in the day if you are in court today.
I will not tell you my views about CAFCASS but needless to say since they are "independent social workers" who are paid per case, I am not so sure that they really care about producing a coherent report that is based on facts. You will be amazed at how poor their reports can sometimes be.

[FTW Mamuskills]

Re: Child contact process and delays.

Forgot to update, my solicitor called. He is unable to make court tommorow as he is double booked. He has assigned me a barrister from the family
law panel.

So news has gone from bad to worse, Cafcass has ignored me & the contact centre, my solicitor will be unable to make it and I have no time at all to discuss the errors
contained in the report with Cafcass