Triple threat - house, work and son. Where do I even start?

[dazed]

• Mother of son (not married) is going for a house she paid nothing into but appears to be on the joint tenancy deed
• she's attempting the destruction of my work and reputation via a harassment charge at magistrates court at the end of this month
• this is supposed to be "my weekend" with my son, she texted me this morning to say she'd be collecting him and he would stay with her for now.

School said I had every right to collect him, but I didn't want a scene, so I left it.

Most urgent is the court case on the 28th. The charge sheet is bonkers - they're listing emails like one where I replied saying "Yes, I can have our son that week".
She accused me of going to her house uninvited, but I have a Whatsapp message asking me to drop his school bag in.
And so on, and so on.

I've spent the whole day on hold to various places finding that all my legal cover policies covered everything except anything I needed.

Never been to court before, I REALLY need advice on what to do. I'll get the duty solicitor, but I want to make my own statement. I've got LOADS of people willing to write character witnesses, but what form should they take

Finally, what about counter-strikes? Could I just find a load of "annoying" emails she has written me over the 3 and report them to the police?
Or even just report her for continued harassment. After all, I genuinely find her behaviour over the last 3.5 years to be causing alarm and distress.


(I was hoping to keep this case to the private forum and I'm getting fairly frantic so I paid, joined and posted in VIP on Monday but no response)

[pt2537]

• Mother of son (not married) is going for a house she paid nothing into but appears to be on the joint tenancy deed
• she's attempting the destruction of my work and reputation via a harassment charge at magistrates court at the end of this month
• this is supposed to be "my weekend" with my son, she texted me this morning to say she'd be collecting him and he would stay with her for now.

School said I had every right to collect him, but I didn't want a scene, so I left it.

Most urgent is the court case on the 28th. The charge sheet is bonkers - they're listing emails like one where I replied saying "Yes, I can have our son that week".
She accused me of going to her house uninvited, but I have a Whatsapp message asking me to drop his school bag in.
And so on, and so on.

I've spent the whole day on hold to various places finding that all my legal cover policies covered everything except anything I needed.

Never been to court before, I REALLY need advice on what to do. I'll get the duty solicitor, but I want to make my own statement. I've got LOADS of people willing to write character witnesses, but what form should they take

Finally, what about counter-strikes? Could I just find a load of "annoying" emails she has written me over the 3 and report them to the police?
Or even just report her for continued harassment. After all, I genuinely find her behaviour over the last 3.5 years to be causing alarm and distress.


(I was hoping to keep this case to the private forum and I'm getting fairly frantic so I paid, joined and posted in VIP on Monday but no response)

Hi there

Sorry you havent had a reply sooner, sadly cases like this are notoriously complex and difficult to advise on.

Ok how is your ex on the title ? Did you purchase the house together? Is there a mortgage in both names?

On the harassment side of things, i dont deal with criminal cases but i do civil harassment, and the bar is very high indeed. Can you perhaps give us some more info about the ccase and we will try to assist?

[jaguarsuk]

The point the prosecution need to satisfy beyond all reasonable doubt in the Harassment case is whether you knew or ought to have known that your conduct would amount to harassment.

The CPS have not progressed this case on the basis of an email saying you could have your son and one uninvited instance of you attending your ex's address.

The reality is that we need to know all of what is being accused because if we don't know the full picture we cannot give proper advice.

It's really important because if you are convicted of this it could throw a spanner in the works of any Family Court case regards access to your son. Whilst you might not be there yet if she continues to refuse you access you will have no choice, but to go down that route and it may well this accusation is part of building towards that on her part.

As well as a criminal conviction and sentence, the court if asked could give you a restraining order under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997 s.5. The court can order you not to contact your ex in any way and not to go within any distance they see fit of her or her home. And breaking such a restraining order makes an offender liable to between six months and five years imprisonment.

[dazed]

Ok how is your ex on the title ? Did you purchase the house together? Is there a mortgage in both names?

Thank you - I have a thread open here:
https://legalbeagles.info/forums/for...house-or-bribe

[dazed]

The reality is that we need to know all of what is being accused because if we don't know the full picture we cannot give proper advice.

OK, here it is:

[CHARGE 1]- Harassment without violence - Between 19/06/2018 and 28/01/2018 at XXXX and elsewhere pursued a course of conduct which amounted to the harassment of XXXX and which you knew or ought to have known amounted to the harassment of her in that you contacted her when advised not to do so by e mail on 11/9/18,22/10/18, 26/10/18, 3/11/18, 4/11/18, 7/11/18, 26/11/18, 30/11/2018, 26/1/19 &; 28/1/19; you attended uninvited at her address on 1/12/18 & 27/1/19; you telephoned her on 26/1/19 contrary to section 2(1) and (2) of the Protection from Harassment Act 1997

I have found every single email and message referred to above.

Note the error in the date on line 1. Alongside the unsigned and undated PIN, there are just so many technical things wrong.
However, I'm not going to wriggle on technicalities. I'm just going to plead not guilty to conduct "which you knew or ought to have known amounted to the harassment of her".

I can redact the personal info and PM you a link to the messages in question if you want. They're embarrassing insofar as the whole thing is so pompous and petty, but I honestly think anyone would struggle extremely hard to find the emails "harassing", particularly as it's so clear to everyone I have shown them to that the emails are either trying to resolve the situation, or are simply mundane replies to emails she initiated (as in diary changes, violin lessons etc).

But if you'd like to see them, please let me know!

The ONE iffy part is where her solicitor wrote a letter one week after I was seen with my new partner in town (co-incidence I'm sure!)

It was dated as being written the previous Saturday, not posted until the Friday after, and gave me an arbitary 21 days to agree to pay £50k, to be paid within 56 days, or he'd force sale the house and divide 50/50 (£15k debt, no savings, he know it's not possible for me to do that).

This led to a "tense" phone call; I said she really needed to stop this now before it went too far. But I didn't threaten any kind of action.

This is, however, ONE event out of 12 mundane emails, I would certainly plead not guilty to "a course of action". Which is, after all, what the charges are about.

Each item is not a seperate charge, they are not taking the phone call as being "a thing" in itself, they are taking them as a course of action "with intent" as far as I understand it.

Thank you

[jaguarsuk]

OK, here it is:



I have found every single email and message referred to above.

Note the error in the date on line 1. Alongside the unsigned and undated PIN, there are just so many technical things wrong.
However, I'm not going to wriggle on technicalities. I'm just going to plead not guilty to conduct "which you knew or ought to have known amounted to the harassment of her".

I can redact the personal info and PM you a link to the messages in question if you want. They're embarrassing insofar as the whole thing is so pompous and petty, but I honestly think anyone would struggle extremely hard to find the emails "harassing", particularly as it's so clear to everyone I have shown them to that the emails are either trying to resolve the situation, or are simply mundane replies to emails she initiated (as in diary changes, violin lessons etc).

But if you'd like to see them, please let me know!

The ONE iffy part is where her solicitor wrote a letter one week after I was seen with my new partner in town (co-incidence I'm sure!)

It was dated as being written the previous Saturday, not posted until the Friday after, and gave me an arbitary 21 days to agree to pay £50k, to be paid within 56 days, or he'd force sale the house and divide 50/50 (£15k debt, no savings, he know it's not possible for me to do that).

This led to a "tense" phone call; I said she really needed to stop this now before it went too far. But I didn't threaten any kind of action.

This is, however, ONE event out of 12 mundane emails, I would certainly plead not guilty to "a course of action". Which is, after all, what the charges are about.

Each item is not a seperate charge, they are not taking the phone call as being "a thing" in itself, they are taking them as a course of action "with intent" as far as I understand it.

Thank you

It will be useful to see the emails yes please.

Have you had a plea and directions hearing or is this coming appearance your first in the Magistrates Court for this matter?

Have you filed a Defence Statement or made Request for disclosure by the prosecution?

Has the prosecution sent you a notice that they wish to introduce evidence solely by written witness statement?

Has the prosecution served a notice to restrict cross examination by the defendant on you?

[dazed]

Thank you - apologies for delayed reply, email notifications are a bit flakey!

[1] It will be useful to see the emails yes please.

[2]Have you had a plea and directions hearing or is this coming appearance your first in the Magistrates Court for this matter?

[3]Have you filed a Defence Statement or made Request for disclosure by the prosecution?

[4]Has the prosecution sent you a notice that they wish to introduce evidence solely by written witness statement?

[5]Has the prosecution served a notice to restrict cross examination by the defendant on you?

[1] Will PM you later. Thank you.
[2] First ever appearance in any court for anything (this is magistrates)
[3] This hasn't been suggested yet
[4] and [5] No

What seemed odd, but positive, is that the duty solicitor who was there for the original voluntary interview under caution CAN help me privately (for a fee of course), and I offered to pay for 30 minutes of time, but said I really don't need to. "Just turn up 30 minutes early, come and see me as the duty solicitor, we'll have a quick chat and get it done".

Regarding why the case is being brought, there are two schools of thought among a couple of ex-cop friends.

The first is that the CPS simply don't bring cases which they don't think they're going to win, albeit a rather flimsy case.
The second is that the police are so sick of her getting on the phone every time she gets out of bed on the wrong side, that they want this to be a sort of "enough is enough, grow up, stop wasting our time, go away" sort of thing.

Finally, I've just found that one of the magistrates will almost certainly be someone who chairs a charity who were extremely impressed with some work I did for them. Is there anything I should know about regarding this (apart from the fact that this should hopefully benefit me somewhat).