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Hi I’ve been with my other half 13 years, married for 11. Eldest daughter now 18 is mine from a previous relationship & the hubby & I have 2 kids together - age 6 & 10.
There’s been issues with emotional abuse from my husband & he’s an alcoholic. He’s not got on well for years with my 18 year old and the emotional abuse started with her before he moved on to me. Things he’s done are leaving her outside waiting to get in after school claiming he never heard her knocking, smashing up her room when we’ve not been in and blaming the cats for it. With me I’m disabled and can’t drive and he’ll do things like refusing to take me places or refuse to pay his share of the bills if things don’t go his way.
We’ve not shared a room or had any physical contact for 4 years, I’m the one holding it all together whilst he sits in his own room drinking. He says he doesn’t have a problem and it’s all in my head. I’ve been in the room and found empty whisky bottles stashed everywhere and I’m told daily how he’s been the shop and purchased another bottle although he denies this. There’s been important days that he’s missed like Christmas Day and celebrations because he drinks and can’t function.
I’ve asked for a divorce and he threatens to take the youngest kids or at least one of them. His parents help out with childcare and school runs as we both work and one child is also disabled and has transport to and from school so someone needs to be here and I’ve stressed that nothing like that needs to change & we can all carry in with family things for the sake of the kids.
I barely go out these days because I live in fear of what may happen if I’m not there like him smashing things up or him taunting my eldest. He also seems to have a jealous streak and if she & I are sat together talking he’ll come sit and listen and it’s a weird feeling.
we also can’t make any noise at night and are yelled out if we do make any sounds. We had a bit of banter earlier he shot out of his room and told us all to shut up. Then came a message of now his parents won’t babysit on Sunday as it’s my daughters birthday and we’d arranged a meal and his parents to babysit the younger 2.
it’s like he’s trying to trap me inside and I feel overwhelmed by his actions. He will go work and 20 minutes later I’ll get a message asking how the kids are yet he’s not been gone long. If I don’t answer him on messenger he’ll then send a text and I’ve asked him to stop that. If we go out around a shop he’s at the back of me all the time if I break off he’ll find me and scour the trolley for what’s in there.
In also told daily to pay his parents £9000. This is some money they have to us that we could use to put towards a house deposit. I was told it was. A gift my husband says he agreed to pay it back the money went in my account but he spent it on anything and everything now years down the line im being told I have to repay it not him.
im absolutely scared I can’t cope please help
There’s been issues with emotional abuse from my husband & he’s an alcoholic. He’s not got on well for years with my 18 year old and the emotional abuse started with her before he moved on to me. Things he’s done are leaving her outside waiting to get in after school claiming he never heard her knocking, smashing up her room when we’ve not been in and blaming the cats for it. With me I’m disabled and can’t drive and he’ll do things like refusing to take me places or refuse to pay his share of the bills if things don’t go his way.
We’ve not shared a room or had any physical contact for 4 years, I’m the one holding it all together whilst he sits in his own room drinking. He says he doesn’t have a problem and it’s all in my head. I’ve been in the room and found empty whisky bottles stashed everywhere and I’m told daily how he’s been the shop and purchased another bottle although he denies this. There’s been important days that he’s missed like Christmas Day and celebrations because he drinks and can’t function.
I’ve asked for a divorce and he threatens to take the youngest kids or at least one of them. His parents help out with childcare and school runs as we both work and one child is also disabled and has transport to and from school so someone needs to be here and I’ve stressed that nothing like that needs to change & we can all carry in with family things for the sake of the kids.
I barely go out these days because I live in fear of what may happen if I’m not there like him smashing things up or him taunting my eldest. He also seems to have a jealous streak and if she & I are sat together talking he’ll come sit and listen and it’s a weird feeling.
we also can’t make any noise at night and are yelled out if we do make any sounds. We had a bit of banter earlier he shot out of his room and told us all to shut up. Then came a message of now his parents won’t babysit on Sunday as it’s my daughters birthday and we’d arranged a meal and his parents to babysit the younger 2.
it’s like he’s trying to trap me inside and I feel overwhelmed by his actions. He will go work and 20 minutes later I’ll get a message asking how the kids are yet he’s not been gone long. If I don’t answer him on messenger he’ll then send a text and I’ve asked him to stop that. If we go out around a shop he’s at the back of me all the time if I break off he’ll find me and scour the trolley for what’s in there.
In also told daily to pay his parents £9000. This is some money they have to us that we could use to put towards a house deposit. I was told it was. A gift my husband says he agreed to pay it back the money went in my account but he spent it on anything and everything now years down the line im being told I have to repay it not him.
im absolutely scared I can’t cope please help
)
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