Family burial plot - can we prevent step-mother being buried there?

[Atom]

Our mother and brother died many years ago and our father re-married even though he didn't really want to but nonetheless did. He passed away a few years ago.
As his new wife wanted to be buried alongside him, before his death, he made arrangements for our mother's and brother's interred ashes to be moved to a new plot as he had always wanted to be interred with our mother but didn't want to upset the new wife.
He tried to make the best of a bad situation.

The new plot now has our mother, our brother, and our father's ashes in it with one space.

Since his passing, the step-mother has decided she wants nothing more to do with us, her late husband's children, and has cut off ties from us.
We (my sister and I) feel she doesn't really belong in with our family members given that she dislikes us, and especially as our father would have been horrified at the way she has cut off from us, as we were his pride and joy.

I know there was a funeral plan which paid for my father's funeral but I have never seen a will or anything so I don't know if there is anything that states the step-mother must be buried there or if it is just accepted that she will go there.

Is there any way we can prevent the step-mother from being interred in with our family members? It feels so wrong and hurtful the thought of her being in there with our beloved family and knowing that our father would strongly object if he was alive, at the way she has cut ties from us.

[Atom]

bump

[ostell]

Have you got a copy of the will?

[des8]

Funnily enough a testators wishes regarding disposal of his/her remains are not binding on the executor.

This means whoever arranges the funeral, can also arrange for the remains to be disposed of however he wishes (as long as it is legal)

Who owns the grave where your mother and father lie?
That person will have the final word on whether or not your step mother can be interred there.

[Atom]

bump

no, but i would think we could get a copy as he was our father?

[Atom]

Funnily enough a testators wishes regarding disposal of his/her remains are not binding on the executor.

This means whoever arranges the funeral, can also arrange for the remains to be disposed of however he wishes (as long as it is legal)

Who owns the grave where your mother and father lie?
That person will have the final word on whether or not your step mother can be interred there.

Really interesting. Thank you!

My father owned the plot when he was alive, so I am guessing it then naturally passed to the step mother once he died as he was married to her? My sister and I were accepting of the decision to have her in our family plot when the decision was made (when Dad was alive), but now she has cut ties with the blood relatives of all the people that lie in that plot, it no longer seems the right thing to do. No one who lies there would be at all happy with her treatment of us.

Assuming the plot has naturally become her property since Dad died, would it then become her own biological children's property upon her death if not otherwise specified? How do we go about asking to see his will if she won't speak to us? Can we apply to see it?

I recall having a conversation with my Dad when he was writing his will that his property should become his wife's upon his death, but then back to HIS biological children once she died. Whether such a stipulation is possible or not, I have no idea.

[des8]

If probate has been granted you can obtain a copy of the will here;https://www.gov.uk/search-will-probate

IF (repeat IF!) it is now absolutely your step mother's, she will be able to dispose of it as she wishes.
However if she was only given a life interest in your father's property it may well revert t his biological children.....all depends on the will (if you can find it!)