Does Santa exist?

**Solowka** · 24th December 2008, 20:46:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

no he doesnt, i`ve been very good this year and will be getting sod all.

**Amy** · 24th December 2008, 21:08:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

Yes he does and it's about the giving not the receiving.

**Mochamoo** · 24th December 2008, 23:22:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

I believe that the more you give the more you get even if its just warm gooey feelings xxx

**Solowka** · 24th December 2008, 23:24:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

Bah humbug

**Mochamoo** · 24th December 2008, 23:28:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

Are you off or working?

**Tools** · 24th December 2008, 23:30:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

The Legality of Santa Claus

December 22, 2008

So we have arrived at that time of year again - Christmas.
At this time a decade ago I would most likely be in my house, causing exited christmas shennanigans before promptly being warned that Santa Claus wouldn’t give me any presents as I had been bad (my family wasn’t down with coal). At this point I’d fear for a lack of Batman action figures under the tree and immediately ran to help in the kitchen.
So lets hurtle back to the present day and in the process of racing here I’ve lost my belief in Santa Claus (boo hoo, the end of innocence is nigh) and I usually have to co-ordinate all incoming gifts for the family via amazon. As I listlessly add a copy of the ‘mamma mia’ dvd to my shopping cart I begin to consider how Santa Claus would exist in this time and age. Taking into account the fact that I write a legal blog I decided it opportune to examine Santa’s existence from a legal perspective, so now i finally pose the point of this post to you - Is Santa Claus legal?
(Note the arguments posed here all assume santa is real)
Now when examining Santa’s existence from a legal perspective the first thing we must look at his delivery methods. Here is a man who rides animals onto your roof, forces his way down the chimney and enters your living room. Once there he deems it appropriate to eat your food and leave things If he decides your good enough for them. Breaking and entering. It’s the first and most obvious count against Santa Claus.
So is Santa really breaking in illegally? Well look at this way. How often has the news reported him breaking into houses? Not often, if ever. People aren’t going to complain a man is coming into thier houses at night and doing the work for them - and in an economic downturn they’d most likely be glad they’ve saved a couple of hundred quid. Parent’s tell kids to behave well for Santa or else he won’t come. Kids leave food out for him - he’s a silently invited guest. So on the charge of breaking and entering we can aquit Santa of the charge.
Next charge - Slave labour. So a bunch of elves are forced to spend all thier time making toys? We’re given no indication that they’re paid well or even paid at all - merely that the elves are happy and it’s what they do best. That doesn’t sound like slave labour at all now does it? Of course it’s rumoured that Santa does pay them in Egg-nog and love, which you know doesn’t really count as money. Then again - in the current economic downturn who are we to decide what counts as a currency is some kooky land that makes us presents? The elves also most likely have to work extreme working hours, well beyond the average European Union employee for peanuts. But then again Santa’s ‘lapland’ is basically his country so he makes the rules there. And when a leader ****s around, especially a lovable leader, no-one is going to anything - I mean how long has Mugabe been playing around? So really on the whole slave labour front it’s a case of Santa makes the rules in lapland so he goes innocent.
Now it’s time for the copyright infringement problem. Remember when you were a kid - most of the toys on your list probably had been trademarked or patented at one point. Action men, barbies, ferrari model cars, guns - all had a trademarked stamped on ‘em at birth. So Santa spends his time rebuilding these toys for children and shipping them out for them on christmas - millions of them at the least. So now you’re mattel - think of all that potential revenue flushing itslef down the drain because a fat man wants to spread christmas cheer. Look at Viacom’s attack on Youtube (*cough* in blog *end cough*) they wanted a billion due to lost revenue caused by illegally uploaded videos. Santa can be found guilty of copyright fraud - but it wouldn’t jail him, merely fine him. Though that fine could destroy his operation’s capital meaning he can’t stay afloat. Score one for Santa haters.
Next up: Traffic Law violations. I’d like to wake up one morning and shake hands with the man who deemed it appropriate to give a laughing old man who wore what surely looked like pajamas a license. Then again, Santa is in charge of the country and could easily get himself a license. So now he’s flying through the skies delivering presents. Here he is seemingly vulnerable however ‘the nightmare before christmas’ highlights a different posibility. In the film, Jack (who is stealing christmas) as santa claus is cheered initially but when it becomes apparent he is not Santa Claus - the american military shoot him out of the sky. Then again what of the middle east? They’re not Santa fans? Considering the controversies over territory in recent news it would not be all surprising if they wanted to haul Santa in. So Santa can be taken down on those parts.
So we have found Santa can be charged on two crimes. Copyright infringement and airspace violations. But in honesty while there is a possibility this could jail Santa it is nothing that couldn’t be sorted with some trade agreements with the copyright holders and some licenses to fly around airspace come christmas eve.
I am off now as i want hot chocolate.
merry christmas!
and an adequate new year.

So you’re arguing that the elves are engaged in some form of paternalistic slavery? I don’t think that makes you better than many plantation owners in the 1850s-60s…
Although you could argue that happiness and a steady job far outweigh our wage-slavery and uncertain economic times, I do not think that slavery in any form can be beneficial.
In order to fully ascertain whether these slaves do receive some sort of recompense (perhaps they work for their lodgings?), a full investigation into the factory must be made. As Mattel are up in arms about this Yueltide fiend cutting into their territory, I’m sure they will be happy to sponsor your endeavours.
I look forward to the trial!

**TANZARELLI** · 24th December 2008, 23:32:PM

Re: Does Santa exist?

He exists in my house and my daughter has already had a stop off. I know this by the half eaten carrot and mince pie thats now by the fire.