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jokes about men

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  • jokes about men

    1. Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground? A. Shoot him again.

    2. Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung? A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.


    3. Q. Why do little boys whine? A. Because they're practicing to be men.



    4. Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him. OR Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.



    5. Q. What do you call a handcuffed man? A. Trustworthy.



    6. Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough



    7. Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg? A. Because not one will stop and ask directions



    8. Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating? A. To stop the snoring before it starts.



    9. Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.



    10. Q: What is the difference between men and women... A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.



    11. Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.



    12. Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder: "Instruction Manuals"
    Member of the Beagles £2 coin and small change savers clubs, both based in the Debt Forum:11:

  • #2
    Re: jokes about men

    And to think I thought you were so sweet...

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: jokes about men

      Originally posted by EXC View Post
      And to think I thought you were so sweet...

      I am Exc honest, just in a funny mood today, and just for the record I do not hate men lol
      Member of the Beagles £2 coin and small change savers clubs, both based in the Debt Forum:11:

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: jokes about men

        Originally posted by scottishlass View Post
        I am Exc honest, just in a funny mood today, and just for the record I do not hate men lol

        Just the ones that breathe eh SL ?

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: jokes about men

          Originally posted by EXC View Post
          And to think I thought you were so sweet...
          I did as well, how wrong can us men be?
          Borrow money from a pessimist -- they don't expect it back.

          Comment

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