Tweet
Hi all,
My Dad recently passed away (2/11/20), my Dad had made his will in 2015 and 3 years later he had a major stroke.
Luckily Dad had an LPA made at the same time.
My Dad has had a rocky relationship with my brother, ever since my parents divorced and my brother was forced to live with Dad.
We all moved into 2 cottages, that belonged to my Gran. Dad and brother in one, me and my partner in the other. I was diagnosed with Chronic fatigue and it is difficult for me to work, like healthy people. Myself and my partner have not been dependant on my Dad in any way, other than living in one of the properties. We have paid for renovations, bills, upkeep by ourselves. We have struggled but done most of the work ourselves to save money.
Before he left home and married, my brother has said some awful things to my Dad and has lied profusely. He has ‘borrowed’ between £11-15k for cars, motorbikes, fines and never repaid it and disappeared for 3 years after his house was repossessed. When he visited after the years away, he wouldn’t say where he was living and drove my Dad to the bank for £1000. He has remarried and earns a lot of money from his job. I earn less than a quarter of his monthly earnings. I have never borrowed money from my Dad, although he has offered when I’ve struggled but I have declined. Myself and my brother are estranged as he claims that I pushed my Dad into selling some of his motorbike parts, that had been sitting in a shed for 10 years. I merely helped my Dad to sort the shed. My Dad sold the parts to a neighbour.
My Dad made his will and I inherit the majority. Dad gifted me my cottage and any money left after my brother had his share. I have to value my Dads cottage and my Dad stated that my brother gets 20% or £40k, whichever is the lower. I then get my Dads cottage too. The will states that my brother must sign and agree to this before he gets his share and my Dad stated that the decision was deliberate and a list of reasons is included with the will.
Dad made me his LPA because he trusted me and when he had his stroke, I took on the role. The hospital told my brother that I was my Dads LPA and my brother hit the roof, lost his temper with my Dad, just days after his stroke. It made my Dad very poorly. My brother claimed that I had bullied my Dad into it.
My brother has never visited my Dad for any longer than 20 mins before his stroke. He hardly visited my Dad in hospital, never offered help to me. When my Dad came home, he was bedridden and incontinent. I cared for my Dad, including his personal care, kept his house and garden tidy, shopped for him, employed carers. I had a breakdown from the stress of caring for him and suffer from PTSD, due to the constant banging that my Dad did from frustration of being bedridden. I’d do it all over again and again because I loved him so much.
My brother visited very little, stopping for only 5 mins and telling my Dad that he should be in a care home instead. Dad wanted to be in his own home and I wanted him in his own home too. My brother would promise to bring his children to visit Grandad but didn’t fulfil that promise on numerous occasions.
My Dad was rushed to hospital and I was with my Dad until he took his last breath. I do not know where my brother lives, so I had to wake up my Mum, on my way home from the hospital, to tell her to let my brother know that Dad had passed away. Two days after my Dad passed, my brother text me asking when was I going to tell him about what happened to Dad. I text him, explaining what happened and who was doing the funeral. I gave him their number and said to get in touch with them, leave your details and they will let you know all the arrangements, etc. He rang them once. I hadn’t appointed a solicitor but an old school friend, who does wills, probate, etc., told me that my brother had phoned every solicitor in the town and the next town, asking who had my Dads will. I have now appointed a solicitor and they have contacted him, letting him know that they will be in touch and that he is not an executor. They know that myself and my brother are estranged.
My Dads funeral was on Monday and my brother stood in the road. He had flowers from himself and his children, delivered to the undertaker. I had requested to throw a rose in the grave and I asked the undertaker to find him to throw one in too but he had gone.
If he was a nicer person, I would prefer it to be 50/50 but he has done nothing but bad mouth me and my Dad over the years, told people that I’m dead and I feel that he will contest the will.
My question is, can he do that, with my Dad requesting he sign agreeing to his share and after being so unkind and offering no help with my Dads care, etc.?
My Dad recently passed away (2/11/20), my Dad had made his will in 2015 and 3 years later he had a major stroke.
Luckily Dad had an LPA made at the same time.
My Dad has had a rocky relationship with my brother, ever since my parents divorced and my brother was forced to live with Dad.
We all moved into 2 cottages, that belonged to my Gran. Dad and brother in one, me and my partner in the other. I was diagnosed with Chronic fatigue and it is difficult for me to work, like healthy people. Myself and my partner have not been dependant on my Dad in any way, other than living in one of the properties. We have paid for renovations, bills, upkeep by ourselves. We have struggled but done most of the work ourselves to save money.
Before he left home and married, my brother has said some awful things to my Dad and has lied profusely. He has ‘borrowed’ between £11-15k for cars, motorbikes, fines and never repaid it and disappeared for 3 years after his house was repossessed. When he visited after the years away, he wouldn’t say where he was living and drove my Dad to the bank for £1000. He has remarried and earns a lot of money from his job. I earn less than a quarter of his monthly earnings. I have never borrowed money from my Dad, although he has offered when I’ve struggled but I have declined. Myself and my brother are estranged as he claims that I pushed my Dad into selling some of his motorbike parts, that had been sitting in a shed for 10 years. I merely helped my Dad to sort the shed. My Dad sold the parts to a neighbour.
My Dad made his will and I inherit the majority. Dad gifted me my cottage and any money left after my brother had his share. I have to value my Dads cottage and my Dad stated that my brother gets 20% or £40k, whichever is the lower. I then get my Dads cottage too. The will states that my brother must sign and agree to this before he gets his share and my Dad stated that the decision was deliberate and a list of reasons is included with the will.
Dad made me his LPA because he trusted me and when he had his stroke, I took on the role. The hospital told my brother that I was my Dads LPA and my brother hit the roof, lost his temper with my Dad, just days after his stroke. It made my Dad very poorly. My brother claimed that I had bullied my Dad into it.
My brother has never visited my Dad for any longer than 20 mins before his stroke. He hardly visited my Dad in hospital, never offered help to me. When my Dad came home, he was bedridden and incontinent. I cared for my Dad, including his personal care, kept his house and garden tidy, shopped for him, employed carers. I had a breakdown from the stress of caring for him and suffer from PTSD, due to the constant banging that my Dad did from frustration of being bedridden. I’d do it all over again and again because I loved him so much.
My brother visited very little, stopping for only 5 mins and telling my Dad that he should be in a care home instead. Dad wanted to be in his own home and I wanted him in his own home too. My brother would promise to bring his children to visit Grandad but didn’t fulfil that promise on numerous occasions.
My Dad was rushed to hospital and I was with my Dad until he took his last breath. I do not know where my brother lives, so I had to wake up my Mum, on my way home from the hospital, to tell her to let my brother know that Dad had passed away. Two days after my Dad passed, my brother text me asking when was I going to tell him about what happened to Dad. I text him, explaining what happened and who was doing the funeral. I gave him their number and said to get in touch with them, leave your details and they will let you know all the arrangements, etc. He rang them once. I hadn’t appointed a solicitor but an old school friend, who does wills, probate, etc., told me that my brother had phoned every solicitor in the town and the next town, asking who had my Dads will. I have now appointed a solicitor and they have contacted him, letting him know that they will be in touch and that he is not an executor. They know that myself and my brother are estranged.
My Dads funeral was on Monday and my brother stood in the road. He had flowers from himself and his children, delivered to the undertaker. I had requested to throw a rose in the grave and I asked the undertaker to find him to throw one in too but he had gone.
If he was a nicer person, I would prefer it to be 50/50 but he has done nothing but bad mouth me and my Dad over the years, told people that I’m dead and I feel that he will contest the will.
My question is, can he do that, with my Dad requesting he sign agreeing to his share and after being so unkind and offering no help with my Dads care, etc.?
Comment