Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

[Peng2]

Hi all

First of all, sorry if this is in the wrong section but i couldnt find anything relevant.

To cut a long story short, about 4 years ago my daughter from my ex wife (daughter is 14 now) decided she wanted nothing more to do with me and contact stopped even though i got into a lot of debt paying solicitors etc to get contact in the first place.

I will add that i still pay child support for her

so my question is, i have finally decided to do a will (a free service through my union) and although i dont want her to have anything i am worried in the event of my death she (or should i say her mother) will try and contest it. So with that in mind if i add her to the will saying she gets a nominal amount, will that be enough to fend off a contest of the will.

Thanks in advance

[Kati]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

[MENTION=85500]Peridot[/MENTION] [MENTION=141]enaid[/MENTION] [MENTION=39710]des8[/MENTION] ... any idea??

[des8]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

What a sad situation for you.

It is virtually impossible to stop someone contesting a will, if they are so minded.

The Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975 allows for family and dependants to apply for provision from the estate of someone who has passed away, if they can show that it is needed for their maintenance (and that the estate can provide for it).
You will need to make it clear why you are disinheriting your daughter.

I read somewhere you can create a trust naming the beneficiaries you want to benefit after your death. This is not challengeable in the same way as a will.
Perhaps [MENTION=85500]Peridot[/MENTION] or [MENTION=141]enaid[/MENTION] can advise more

[Peng2]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

What a sad situation for you.

It is virtually impossible to stop someone contesting a will, if they are so minded.

The Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975 allows for family and dependants to apply for provision from the estate of someone who has passed away, if they can show that it is needed for their maintenance (and that the estate can provide for it).
You will need to make it clear why you are disinheriting your daughter.

I read somewhere you can create a trust naming the beneficiaries you want to benefit after your death. This is not challengeable in the same way as a will.
Perhaps @Peridot or @enaid can advise more

Thanks for taking the time in replying

A lot of it is more of her mother "brainwashing" her so to speak. Without going into details i was young and my ex used to beat me, yet she has told my daughter and the courts it was me beating her. She even tried to get an injunction out against me but failed (well i agreed to take a undertaking to the court to stay away as i couldnt afford to defend myself properly).

I might look into that beneficiaries thing and hopefully like you said someone else will come along and advise.

Thanks again

[Peridot]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

Hi Peng 2,
How sad. It is so difficult when children become embroiled in their parents battles and unfortunately all too common, particularly when they live with one parent and have little or no contact with the other, for whatever reason.
I suppose you just have to hope that children will work it out for themselves when they get older. You can't really blame the child for not maintaining contact when they are fed inaccurate facts by the parent they are living with and there is no way of ensuring the truth comes out. Definitely not fair on the children trying to explain things to them as you see it to try and get them to understand. It isn't their fault but it's also not appropriate to put them straight while they are children. I appreciate how difficult it is though.
As Des8 said you can't prevent someone bringing a claim against your estate if they are entitled to. You can leave a letter to your daughter, with your will explaining your decision to leave her out of it. If your daughter is an independent adult when you die any claim is unlikely to be successful, however if you were to die while she is still a minor then it is likely any claim would be successful, which would seem right.
Do you have other children you will be leaving your estate to? Would it be worth considering leaving her something which may head a claim off at the pass so to speak.
In addition if you have lost contact would she even know that you have died? There are strict time limits for bringing claims against someone's estate and obviously you would have to know the person had died to do so. The Court could allow a claim at their discretion of course but if it was a significant time after then it would not paint your daughter in a particularly good light.
Is there a health reason you are worrying about this now. If not then hopefully you have many years ahead of you and therefore the possibility that you and your daughter may build bridges once she's older maybe?
I am not sure what trust Des8 is thinking of when he talked about a trust. The only thing I can think of would be a discretionary trust where the executors/trustees have discretion to pay the fund to a group or selection of people or charities. They may or they may not pay all, some or none of the trust fund out. You would need to provide guidance outside the Will on what you would hope would happen to the trust fund but this is not binding on your executors/trustees, otherwise it is not a discretionary trust. In any event the Will could still be challenged. Sorry can't help on that one. In any event if you did want to set up a trust discretionary or otherwise, you would need to get some proper legal advice on this. There are potential tax consequences which need to be considered.
Hopefully in time you and your daughter may find a way of re-connecting once she's old enough and not so influenced by the person she is living with currently.

[Peng2]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

Thanks for that advice. Ill answer properly later but im at work now, unfortunately lol

[Peng2]

Re: Adding a child who wants nothing to do with me to a will

Hi Peng 2,
How sad. It is so difficult when children become embroiled in their parents battles and unfortunately all too common, particularly when they live with one parent and have little or no contact with the other, for whatever reason.
I suppose you just have to hope that children will work it out for themselves when they get older. You can't really blame the child for not maintaining contact when they are fed inaccurate facts by the parent they are living with and there is no way of ensuring the truth comes out. Definitely not fair on the children trying to explain things to them as you see it to try and get them to understand. It isn't their fault but it's also not appropriate to put them straight while they are children. I appreciate how difficult it is though.
As Des8 said you can't prevent someone bringing a claim against your estate if they are entitled to. You can leave a letter to your daughter, with your will explaining your decision to leave her out of it. If your daughter is an independent adult when you die any claim is unlikely to be successful, however if you were to die while she is still a minor then it is likely any claim would be successful, which would seem right.
Do you have other children you will be leaving your estate to? Would it be worth considering leaving her something which may head a claim off at the pass so to speak.
In addition if you have lost contact would she even know that you have died? There are strict time limits for bringing claims against someone's estate and obviously you would have to know the person had died to do so. The Court could allow a claim at their discretion of course but if it was a significant time after then it would not paint your daughter in a particularly good light.
Is there a health reason you are worrying about this now. If not then hopefully you have many years ahead of you and therefore the possibility that you and your daughter may build bridges once she's older maybe?
I am not sure what trust Des8 is thinking of when he talked about a trust. The only thing I can think of would be a discretionary trust where the executors/trustees have discretion to pay the fund to a group or selection of people or charities. They may or they may not pay all, some or none of the trust fund out. You would need to provide guidance outside the Will on what you would hope would happen to the trust fund but this is not binding on your executors/trustees, otherwise it is not a discretionary trust. In any event the Will could still be challenged. Sorry can't help on that one. In any event if you did want to set up a trust discretionary or otherwise, you would need to get some proper legal advice on this. There are potential tax consequences which need to be considered.
Hopefully in time you and your daughter may find a way of re-connecting once she's old enough and not so influenced by the person she is living with currently.

thanks again for that information, it's really appreciated.

As far as im aware i have no illness that could mean i will pass away in the short or long term for that matter, but i just want to be prepared as you never know whats going to happen.

I might just do my will and leave her out and see what the future brings as i can always add her in to it if need be.

As for her not knowing if i had passed or not, i had never thought of that.