End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

[delladonut]

We've been together 15 years. 2 women. Not married. We have a 4 yr old child that my partner gave birth to. I was fully involved in the pregnancy and birth and his upbringing and care.
We are now separating at her request. We had always intended that i would adopt him to gain legal pr but circumstances have prevented. She has agreed that we will ensure that I am given pr for our son and we will co parent him as we do now.
She works 3 days a week and I look after him. I claim housing and jobseekers as a single ( she gets the child benefit so I can't get income support) and it's hard to find work around the childcare.
I do get some secret cash in hand work.
I pay half the rent (£350 each) and we split the daily living costs best we can do.
She now wants to move out. We have a privately rented joint tenancy. I will be left here, but will still care for our son while she's at work and hope he will live here half the week. Losing him is unbearable.
He starts school in January so I will be able to work more than but still pretty sure only part time.

Because this situation is unusual and out of the normal its difficult to establish what benefits I can claim if/when she moves out.
I think she will agree to agreeing pr- though the route to achieving it is complicated and advice seems varied.
Can anyone advise on a way forward or what /how to claim enough to prevent me potentially becoming homeless? I have three precious dogs btw.
Neither of us have savings or a decent credit rating.

[Openlaw15]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

We've been together 15 years. 2 women. Not married. We have a 4 yr old child that my partner gave birth to. I was fully involved in the pregnancy and birth and his upbringing and care.
We are now separating at her request. We had always intended that i would adopt him to gain legal pr but circumstances have prevented. She has agreed that we will ensure that I am given pr for our son and we will co parent him as we do now.
She works 3 days a week and I look after him. I claim housing and jobseekers as a single ( she gets the child benefit so I can't get income support) and it's hard to find work around the childcare.
I do get some secret cash in hand work.
I pay half the rent (£350 each) and we split the daily living costs best we can do.
She now wants to move out. We have a privately rented joint tenancy. I will be left here, but will still care for our son while she's at work and hope he will live here half the week. Losing him is unbearable.
He starts school in January so I will be able to work more than but still pretty sure only part time.

Because this situation is unusual and out of the normal its difficult to establish what benefits I can claim if/when she moves out.
I think she will agree to agreeing pr- though the route to achieving it is complicated and advice seems varied.
Can anyone advise on a way forward or what /how to claim enough to prevent me potentially becoming homeless? I have three precious dogs btw.
Neither of us have savings or a decent credit rating.

Hello Delladonut,

Sorry to hear about these benefit problems, as all's you want to do is to have enough to look after the child. Have you been to Citizens Advice (CAB), or called the benefits line? Does the biological father not contribute to the child's up-keep besides the biological mother receiving Child Support?

I've tagged [MENTION=49370]Kati[/MENTION] who knows about benefits and stuff, she'll also know of others on here who may be able to help too.

[delladonut]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

No the biological father isn't involved. He just enabled us to have a child.
The cab and benefits people are pretty useless because I don't have pr and we don't fit the"normal" models.
I need to know what I could claim if I live alone but have my sin half the week.

[Kati]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

Hi [MENTION=62402]delladonut[/MENTION] to LB (thanks for the tag [MENTION=77627]Openlaw15[/MENTION]) xx

Are you living in an area where Universal Credit has already been rolled out (you can check here - https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/be...t-eligibility/). There's also a good benefits checker on the Turn2us site (https://benefits-calculator.turn2us.org.uk/AboutYou) which should help you to understand what you would be entitled to. Your local council will have a benefits advisor who you could contact as well

K xx

[delladonut]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

The problem with all these benefits calculator things is that they can't be specific about my status. I don't get the child benefit so they cant understand that I have a child.
I was told that as a single person who doesn't get child benefit I can't even get income support. Hence being on jobseekers.

[wales01man]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

why cant you get child benefit if this helps to get the other benefits you can get as a parent that you are entitled to

[Kati]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

why cant you get child benefit if this helps to get the other benefits you can get as a parent that you are entitled to

only one person is able to claim CB for a child ... as the OP does not have PR and her ex is getting the CB (?) she will not be allowed to claim it

[delladonut]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

Yep. That's it in a nutshell. And because I don't get the CB or have pr yet I'm a bit stuck.

[Snoopy1948]

Re: End of relationship. 2 mums/1child. Legal & Benefit advice needed

On your current housing benefit claim, are you claiming as 'a couple' or just 'two cohabiting friends'? How is the housing benefit claim set up, as a 50% each claim in your own rights, or as a couple in a civil relationship?

If your other half moves out, you will not be able to claim a housing/council tax support premium for the child if you are not the one named on the CHB claim.

From what you say, you will not be able to support the whole rent and council tax situation on your own ... it is also probably unwise to admit, even on this forum, that you are in receipt of undeclared income as convenient though it may be, it is fraud and very much a criminal offence where it is specifically intended to maximise income from benefits. This is true from both the local authority angle and that of the DWP although I am hearing that the DWP take over both investigations nowadays.

Without specific rights to the child and receipt of child benefit for that child, you will be treated as a single woman and I am assuming that you will continue to claim JSA and actually prove that you are seeking work on an ongoing basis and without a proven child responsibility, you will have to pay rent and council tax contributions I believe although there will be support for both. I suggest you phone your local council benefit department ( you may even be able to access an online benefit calculator to do this from home ) and let them do the calculations for you. It would obviously help if your other half will give up CHB payments to you officially to do this although she may well need that herself.

AS you say, it's a messy and complicated situation.