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Hi, I am looking for some advice.
Me and my g/f have been together for 6 years, we bought a house 4 years ago and we have one child together.
She has recently decided she doesn’t want to be with me anymore and has told me she wants to sell the house.
Since telling me she wants to split, she has also quit her job and is no longer paying towards the mortgage or household bills.
I have not changed any of my monthly payments and have told her I don’t want to slit and don’t want to sell either.
Since telling me she doesn’t want to be with me, she goes out every night after our son has been put to bed and on a number of occasions has not returned until the following morning.
When I ask her where she has been she tells me its none of my business.
I have also discovered that she has taken money out of our joint account, and joint savings account (approx 50%, totalling £1600)
I have asked her how she plans to maintain her life style and she has stated that she will not be paying towards anything and that selling the house is the only way to move forward.
Although up until recently she paid towards the mortgage and the bills, it was agreed that as she earned less and worked less hours I would pay a bigger share of the bills (she paid £600, I pay £1000)
Our mortgage is roughly £158k and she says she has had it valued (I cannot confirm this as I wasn’t there) and she say it is now worth £300k
When we bought the property it was in a REALLY bad state. I have spent the past 4 years improving the property (new bathroom, kitchen, extension). I have done most of the work myself and feel that I have contributed far more to the property than she has.
When we bought the house we put down a £30k deposit (£15k each)
She has since spent all of her savings, quit her job and has no way of supporting the mortgage.
However, despite not having means to pay her way, she has recently signed up to a 24month phone contract and treats the house as a hotel.
She said I either have to sell or buy her out. I have told her, as she is the one saying she is unhappy maybe she should leave.
She said she would not leave and not leave our son.
I have told her I don’t want to sell the family home, or disrupt my sons life.
She is under the impression she can force the sale of the house and then move into a private rented property locally and claim housing benefit. She also said that she would go back to work part time and claim tax credits (bringing her income up to a full time wage)
I have made her 2 offers. The 1st was for £20K which she declined. The 2nd was for £40k which at 1st she declined but then said she would take it if it included FULL custody of our son.
Since getting the valuation on the house she is now saying she wants 50% (£71K)
As I have done all of the refurbishments and improvements to the house I don’t think it is fair that she should expect 50%.
I cannot raise £71k so that would be out of the question.
I don’t want to sell, I don’t want to lose any custody of my son.
What are my options? Our 2 year fixed rate mortgage deal runs out in DEC, then it goes to STV. Which will push the monthly payments up. I can afford this rise but would rather renew the deal and the monthly payment would go down.
Other options I have thought of are, renting the property out (she wont have money to get a new place to live though)
Or maybe buy her out and then rent rooms out?
need some advice…. Don’t know what to do, where to turn or how to put things right !!!
Me and my g/f have been together for 6 years, we bought a house 4 years ago and we have one child together.
She has recently decided she doesn’t want to be with me anymore and has told me she wants to sell the house.
Since telling me she wants to split, she has also quit her job and is no longer paying towards the mortgage or household bills.
I have not changed any of my monthly payments and have told her I don’t want to slit and don’t want to sell either.
Since telling me she doesn’t want to be with me, she goes out every night after our son has been put to bed and on a number of occasions has not returned until the following morning.
When I ask her where she has been she tells me its none of my business.
I have also discovered that she has taken money out of our joint account, and joint savings account (approx 50%, totalling £1600)
I have asked her how she plans to maintain her life style and she has stated that she will not be paying towards anything and that selling the house is the only way to move forward.
Although up until recently she paid towards the mortgage and the bills, it was agreed that as she earned less and worked less hours I would pay a bigger share of the bills (she paid £600, I pay £1000)
Our mortgage is roughly £158k and she says she has had it valued (I cannot confirm this as I wasn’t there) and she say it is now worth £300k
When we bought the property it was in a REALLY bad state. I have spent the past 4 years improving the property (new bathroom, kitchen, extension). I have done most of the work myself and feel that I have contributed far more to the property than she has.
When we bought the house we put down a £30k deposit (£15k each)
She has since spent all of her savings, quit her job and has no way of supporting the mortgage.
However, despite not having means to pay her way, she has recently signed up to a 24month phone contract and treats the house as a hotel.
She said I either have to sell or buy her out. I have told her, as she is the one saying she is unhappy maybe she should leave.
She said she would not leave and not leave our son.
I have told her I don’t want to sell the family home, or disrupt my sons life.
She is under the impression she can force the sale of the house and then move into a private rented property locally and claim housing benefit. She also said that she would go back to work part time and claim tax credits (bringing her income up to a full time wage)
I have made her 2 offers. The 1st was for £20K which she declined. The 2nd was for £40k which at 1st she declined but then said she would take it if it included FULL custody of our son.
Since getting the valuation on the house she is now saying she wants 50% (£71K)
As I have done all of the refurbishments and improvements to the house I don’t think it is fair that she should expect 50%.
I cannot raise £71k so that would be out of the question.
I don’t want to sell, I don’t want to lose any custody of my son.
What are my options? Our 2 year fixed rate mortgage deal runs out in DEC, then it goes to STV. Which will push the monthly payments up. I can afford this rise but would rather renew the deal and the monthly payment would go down.
Other options I have thought of are, renting the property out (she wont have money to get a new place to live though)
Or maybe buy her out and then rent rooms out?
need some advice…. Don’t know what to do, where to turn or how to put things right !!!
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