Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

[leclerc]

http://www.familylaw.co.uk/news_and_...4#.VDxBZfldXWR

The above relates to the timescale for this to come into operation and is one of the more controversial parts to the Children and Families Act 2014.

I have a further link that explains this part more clearly:
http://www.iflg.uk.com/news/the-chil...the-highlights

[candicevanilla]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

Just read your links and I could literally cry tbh. Not for myself but for my 2 eldest sons if their biological dad ever goes through with taking me to court to see them.

[Kati]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

Just read your links and I could literally cry tbh. Not for myself but for my 2 eldest sons if their biological dad ever goes through with taking me to court to see them.

My two boys (teenagers) won't see their dad until they want to ... he was violent and lost all rights to be in their lives until they make a decision to search him out. I would always help them if they wanted to find him, but I cannot see it happening any time soon.
:_tighthug__by_darkm don't forget we are here for emotional support too [MENTION=54683]candicevanilla[/MENTION]!
K x

[candicevanilla]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

[MENTION=49370]Kati[/MENTION] that sounds very much like my sons father. He lost interest when he no longer had any power and control over me. To start I did everything I could to ensure that the boys could see him if and when they wanted to without him having to come near me. It worked for 2 weeks until he decided that wasn't going to work for him and instead of taking them to his mum's took them to his gf house. They came back distraught. After that I saw a solicitor, made arrangements via my solicitor, this didn't last long neither. He wanted it his way and wasn't thinking of the boys...that was 4 years ago. They have seen him a handful of times since then, mainly due to his mother emotionally blackmailing them into seeing him. Last time was August. Her exact words to them were " you know that your grandad has been seriously ill, surely you won't deny him seeing your dad on his birthday, he might not see many more birthdays". I was so disgusted at her. Well anyway, he is the type of parent that says what he thinks a good parent should say and does nothing. We now live in a different county. Boys won't allow him their phone numbers and have been told through their grandmother to not expect any birthday/Christmas presents from him unless they make the effort to see him. He knows our address. He hasn't once written to them. I am not shocked by this as since I married in 2011 he has been of the opinion that it is the boys that need to make the effort to see him. I truly believe that he cannot understand that they don't want to see him nor why they don't.
I now just leave them to decide for themselves and have for a while now but I am not so sure that I would be able to put up with his family emotionally blackmailing them again.
Wow, sorry, went on a bit :/

[leclerc]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

I do want to add something to this, because the older a child gets, the more important their voice is going to be in regards to contact with their parent(s). For younger children, I think the above is likely to be the case.

[leclerc]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

The following article is Zenith Chambers interpretation of it as well

http://www.zenithchambers.co.uk/cms/...invovement.pdf

[PAWS]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

As I said before, (ad nauseam some might say!) In what twisted world would a parent think a court order will prove how much they love their children? OK I know some guardian parents may poison their children against the absentee parent but surely they shouldn’t put a child, they claim to adore and want to spend time with, through the trauma of a court hearing .The distress of being forced to spend time with what is often a stranger can cause long term psychological damage. I often think of those two boys on an earlier post who were ripped from their beds and then split up just because their dad wanted to show how much he cared!
Yes, a parent may be desperate to see their child and wish to exercise that right. Yes the guardian parent may be spitefully preventing the absent parent from having any contact but they have got to find a mediatory or gentler way to open up communication and work at a pace that suits the children. It may be hard but from what I can see parenting is never easy and all the good parents I know make one sacrifice after another and often suffer a lot of mental and physical hardship just to ensure their children are safe,happy and have a decent chance in life. In some awful cases that may mean staying out of their children’s life or taking a step back from day to day contact.
Many social workers and other ‘officials’ handle these cases with all the subtlety of a bull in a china shop. When they get to work, waving their court orders around it never seems to have a very happing ending –For anyone.

[Crazy council]

Re: Presumption of parental involvement due to come into force from 22nd October

I do want to add something to this, because the older a child gets, the more important their voice is going to be in regards to contact with their parent(s).

this can go very very badley, our SS ( NELC SS ), decided our daughter at 15 was old enough to meet her bio mother ( not had anything t do with her 15 years ), and it was disaterious to say the least.

In my opinion, 18, maybe older before they can really deal with these things. they have so many emotions going through there minds between 12 and 17, i dont think its fair to expect them to make these type of dissensions...