child tax and benefit question

[Liam88]

hi all,

well, after being made redundant at the end of April shortly after this myself and my partner split up, however she still lives here with a view of moving out when she finds somewhere else to live. we sat down and discussed our two children and came to the agreement we would each have them on a 50/50 basis i also asked if i could keep the child benefit payment going into my bank (as i did already as i paid for everything, house, kids etc) only until i found another job as that £135 would decide whether i could financially keep my house or not, (i currently receive housing benefit and JSA) she agreed i could and obviously she would still carry on receiving the child tax credits as she always has.

now however she has signed the paperwork for a flat and gets the keys next week, as we were talking about it i again asked if the arrangement we came to regarding the child benefit would still be ok (as im worrying a lot) to which she replied "i dont know" so i presume from that she will be having it instead.

im not being greedy by any means and i already feel somewhat of a failure for having to ask if i can have the child benefit just in my "hour of need" as in reality she is leaving me high and dry knowing i will struggle to keep the house on alone whilst not in work but the fact remains we will be caring for our two children on a 50/50 basis so surely i maybe entitled to something? as soon as im back in employment i will happily let her claim for all of the child benefit and child tax credits.

ive done so much for my ex partner and our children over the years and it just seems so unfair how things work out.

thoughts please?

thanks in advance

[wales01man]

Re: child tax and benefit question

The child benefit is for the child so if you share them 50/50 why are you expecting it all?

[Inca]

Re: child tax and benefit question

Hi Liam,,a couple of questions if you don't mind.
Is your house mortgaged or social housing?
How old are the children?
By 50/50..what sort of 50/50 care are you planning?

[Liam88]

Re: child tax and benefit question

i basically had the £135 while we were together to put into "the pot" along with my wages and working tax credits as like i said i paid for everything, house bills, food/nappies/baby milk, then presents and treats for the kids, etc whilst she kept the child tax credits of £460 of which she used as her own money, tobacco, energy drinks, chocolate, clothes etc, that was the set up.

i understand what youre saying by me expecting it all but please bare in mind that as this was the arrangement we had while we were together i thought it was the easiest solution to keep it going whilst i looked for work, she wont be short for money she will be in receipt of over £1000 per 4 weeks in benefits alone and will only have to pay for food, gas/electric/water and then nappies/wipes/milk the council tax is nothing as is the rent.

the children wont go without by either of us and will be very well looked after, the point of my question was that for me things will be very tight until i have another job and i wondered as we will be caring for the children on a 50/50 basis would i be entitled to anything legally?

[Liam88]

Re: child tax and benefit question

Hi Liam,,a couple of questions if you don't mind.
Is your house mortgaged or social housing?
How old are the children?
By 50/50..what sort of 50/50 care are you planning?

hi inca,

the house is privately rented.
children are 2 years and 8 months
we've provisionally planned it as 3 days/nights with one parent and 3 days/nights with the other, using the odd day or the 7th day of the week as the swap over day so 3 and half days if that makes sense.

thanks

[wales01man]

Re: child tax and benefit question

Don't know what legally your entitled to can you not talk to each other I take it your on good terms so the money gets to pay for the childrens needs whoever has it ,

[Liam88]

Re: child tax and benefit question

ahh ok.

well its complicated, she only stayed here as she has nowhere else to go, (her family dont bother much) and i was never going to ask her to leave as i wanted the spend as much time with the kids as possible.

our relationship had broken down over a number of issues, her family being one, she would often take things out on me etc getting bad enough to the point where she one day said she cant do it anymore and rather than sort the issues in her life she has chosen to leave me. we have our good and bad days, however im convinced when she does leave (which will be before the month is out) that things will take a turn for worse as it has happened in the past when our first child was born.

[Inca]

Re: child tax and benefit question

I really don't know the answers to this Liam I'm pretty sure Child Benefit will be factored into her benefits award so you will be reliant on her keeping her word.I can't envisage the DWP or any other agency'divvying up' the money for the children despite your 'care plan'..........I could be wrong so please try and get a solicitor and have a look at these links. www.fnf.org.uk...(courtesy of Celestine)
- http://www.nationalprobonocentre.org.uk/ (courtesy of MissFM)

[CleverClogs]

Re: child tax and benefit question

I wasn't aware that parents were currently taxed on their children.

It does seem like a good idea, though. Have you told "George" Gideon Osbourne about this?

[wales01man]

Re: child tax and benefit question

We were keeping it from George but now he will know !

[MissFM]

Re: child tax and benefit question

Morning Liam88

It's great that you can actually talk to each other and both put the children first - that's the only way, IMO, things will work well in the long term:grouphug:

I'm fairly sure that you can split the tax credit (officially, I mean) but that Child Benefit has to be assigned to one parent (could be you or your ex). Of course you can redistribute that between you as seems fair.

If you have the kind of flexible and amicable arrangement that you describe and it remains so, there is no real reason why you can't get through this in a fair and reasonable way, even if money is tight for a while.

Do follow the links above, though, they are good resources to both inform and support if necessary.

A non-legal opinion but hope it helps.

I wish you the very best and a happy result for you all. x

[Liam88]

Re: child tax and benefit question

hi all thanks for the info very useful,

re reading the thread again i cant help but feel i came across the wrong way in the initial post, im not trying to be greedy or do my ex partner out of money, when i said we agreed for me to have the full child benefit untill i find work it wasnt that i expected it as such it was just the easier route to take considering the money already goes into my bank, i really do feel terrible for even having to ask for some of the benefits even though she is in a position where she can easily live on the money she receives, it was just a favour of sorts to help me get through my period of non employment as i wont be receiving any child tax/child benefit if you understand?

i wont go down the route of splitting child tax credits, it seems silly as i dont plan on being unemployed for long, im just worrying about a number of things, even though we are parting on good terms its still very stressful.


thanks

[wales01man]

Re: child tax and benefit question

If the 2 of you can agree on money and the children its best for everyone all round,dont think people on here were thinking bad of you no one wants to see another having a hard time you have proved that 2 people talking sensibly is the way to go fights and arguments are to common in broken relationships,good luck job hunting

[MissFM]

Re: child tax and benefit question

hi all thanks for the info very useful,

re reading the thread again i cant help but feel i came across the wrong way in the initial post, im not trying to be greedy or do my ex partner out of money, when i said we agreed for me to have the full child benefit untill i find work it wasnt that i expected it as such it was just the easier route to take considering the money already goes into my bank, i really do feel terrible for even having to ask for some of the benefits even though she is in a position where she can easily live on the money she receives, it was just a favour of sorts to help me get through my period of non employment as i wont be receiving any child tax/child benefit if you understand?

i wont go down the route of splitting child tax credits, it seems silly as i dont plan on being unemployed for long, im just worrying about a number of things, even though we are parting on good terms its still very stressful.


thanks

Liam - I don't think anyone was thinking badly of you at all! It's always a difficult situation financially when a relationship breaks down, especially where there are children.

Splitting the tax credit is, as I understand it, the normal route where care and residence is shared.

I can see that you have a commitment to looking after your ex as well as your children and admire you for it :yo