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Hi everyone,
This is my first post and i'm actually posting on behalf of my friend.
She has an 18 month daughter and she split with the father when the little one was 5 months. They had an agreement in place where he'd see the child on Sundays for 4 hours (he chose the time and day) he was also paying £50 a week maintenance. The arrangement was working fine and she even got him to come to see their child for 2 extra hours through the week which was on a Tuesday and Thursday.
Now there has been a major breakdown, when this guy turns up he treats my friend like rubbish. He swears at her, calls her every name under the sun etc, he even does it by texts and i've seen all of the texts. She informed him that she could no longer handle having him come to her house twice through the week as he wasn't turning up on time and when he did he'd be there for less than half an hour. But there was it was no problem for him to add those 2 extra hours on the Sunday.
But being the child that he is, he has stopped giving her money, stopped seeing his daughter. Has said that he has over compensated with payments and is expecting a cheque back for all of the money that he has ever given her. And he wants her to go through CSA.
Now i Googled up about CSA and found a thread on this forum, advising someone that going through the CSA is the worst thing ever. I've told her this but she now doesn't know what to do. As mentioned in the thread, i told her she should go to a solicitor and get an agreement drawn up and that they should both sign it. They should also find somewhere neutral where he can see their daughter and where my friend feels safe.
I should mention that she did call the CSA this morning but they couldn't help her as they couldn't find his National Insurance Number (my friend says this is because he was born with a different name).
So is there any other advice people can offer? I thought CSA was a good thing so other than that i don't know much else.
Thanks inadvance
This is my first post and i'm actually posting on behalf of my friend.
She has an 18 month daughter and she split with the father when the little one was 5 months. They had an agreement in place where he'd see the child on Sundays for 4 hours (he chose the time and day) he was also paying £50 a week maintenance. The arrangement was working fine and she even got him to come to see their child for 2 extra hours through the week which was on a Tuesday and Thursday.
Now there has been a major breakdown, when this guy turns up he treats my friend like rubbish. He swears at her, calls her every name under the sun etc, he even does it by texts and i've seen all of the texts. She informed him that she could no longer handle having him come to her house twice through the week as he wasn't turning up on time and when he did he'd be there for less than half an hour. But there was it was no problem for him to add those 2 extra hours on the Sunday.
But being the child that he is, he has stopped giving her money, stopped seeing his daughter. Has said that he has over compensated with payments and is expecting a cheque back for all of the money that he has ever given her. And he wants her to go through CSA.
Now i Googled up about CSA and found a thread on this forum, advising someone that going through the CSA is the worst thing ever. I've told her this but she now doesn't know what to do. As mentioned in the thread, i told her she should go to a solicitor and get an agreement drawn up and that they should both sign it. They should also find somewhere neutral where he can see their daughter and where my friend feels safe.
I should mention that she did call the CSA this morning but they couldn't help her as they couldn't find his National Insurance Number (my friend says this is because he was born with a different name).
So is there any other advice people can offer? I thought CSA was a good thing so other than that i don't know much else.
Thanks inadvance
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