Advice for a friend with regards to an ongoing family law case.

[Askingforafriend]

My friend has been involved in an ongoing custody/access battle with his ex partner for almost a year now and the case has not progressed in any way as his partner is using unfair tactics to postpone any development. The 'tactics' I refer to, she has made a series of false allegations implying that he has presented violent/threatening/aggressive behaviour towards her and as a result the family law case is postponed pending criminal investigations. The accusations made are so opposite to his nature and character. All he wants is to see his son and this whole situation is taking its toll both emotionally and financially. Is there any advice that I can give him to maintain his hope and help move the case forward in a productive way? Law is not my strong point so I really don't know what his options are right now or even what questions to ask, all I know is he is a loving father, a caring & kind person and his son is missing out on the bond, love & support he can offer him. Any constructive advice will be greatly appreciated.

[Kati]

Re: Advice for a friend with regards to an ongoing family law case.

tagging [MENTION=85500]Peridot[/MENTION] [MENTION=39710]des8[/MENTION] [MENTION=6]Amethyst[/MENTION] [MENTION=141]enaid[/MENTION] [MENTION=31453]PAWS[/MENTION]

[PAWS]

Re: Advice for a friend with regards to an ongoing family law case.

For a start – your friend should let it be known he will welcome this investigation as it will give him the opportunity to show he is not aggressive. Unfortunately, there are relationships out there where a partner has been abusive, aggressive and violent but there have been many occasions where a partner has been falsely accused of having such tendencies. It is often used when an ex has little or no defence in a sole custody battle.
If your friend is a kind and loving father then his children will know this and he will have nothing to fear. A child’s love can never be decided by a court and any attempt by his ex to put a barrier between him and his children will only make things worse for her in the fullness of time -EVEN IF HE LOST ANY CUSTODY BATTLE. Some people have to wait many years to show their children that they have always loved them and the reason they were separated was not their fault and that my friend is the worst scenario! One of the clever chaps will be along with sound legal advice but in the meantime, tell him to stay cool. If he has nothing to regret then he will never have anything to fear.
Pxx

[des8]

Re: Advice for a friend with regards to an ongoing family law case.

Hi,
This isn't an area with which I am "au fait" but I did find this on another site.
I hope it is of some use

Protecting Yourself Against Allegations of abuse

• Avoid Conflict. In the context of domestic abuse it can be truly said that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. When there is marital conflict, particularly when a divorce is threatened, it is important to de-escalate any conflict. Remember, what constitutes a “threat of harm” as it relates to domestic abuse is subjective. Something as innocent as blocking a person’s egress from a room so that you can ”talk about things” may be interpreted as domestic abuse. Hanging up the telephone on a person for the same purpose, may be sufficient to sustain a domestic abuse order.

• Use Witnesses. When a divorce is threatened, it is always a good idea to have independent witnesses available when events are planned that could possibly result in conflict. Even after a conflict a witness may play a role by observing the environmental condition, whether any obvious injuries were suffered or the demeanor of parties involved.

• File for a Reciprocal Order. If the allegations of abuse stem from a particular domestic conflict, you may wish to file for a restraining order first. Even if that does not occur, many jurisdictions may allow you to seek an order after the fact resulting in a potential for reciprocal orders. In some jurisdictions the allegations of each petition may be addressed in the same hearing. In others separate hearings are held.

• Address the Legal Standard. All too often affidavits are filed seeking a restraining order where the allegation, if proven true, do not meet the legal standard for the entry of a restraining order. As a result, knowing the legal standard in your state can be important. Where insufficiencies in the pleadings are exposed, the case can be dismissed without an evidentiary hearing. For example, allegations that a defendant told a third party that he would harm the victim may be insufficient because it is based on hearsay or other unreliable evidence, and that the threat was not directly made or made with the intent that it would create a fear of harm in the victim. Incidents of abuse that occurred long ago are also often insufficient to support a case for domestic abuse if there are not allegations of current harm or instilling a fear of harm.

• Expose Factual Inconsistencies. Once domestic abuse has been alleged, a primary goal would be to expose inconsistencies in the allegations made. The strongest inconsistency would be having a strong alibi for the time in question. Is there any independent evidence to refute the allegations? Did you make a phone call during the time in question that can be borne out by telephone records or independent witnesses? Do you have any store receipts, cash machine receipts, work time sheet or records that can demonstrate your unavailability at the time of the alleged abuse? Are there any potential witnesses who may have seen bruises or injuries allegedly sustained in a domestic incident, dating to times before the incidents alleged?

• Expose Documentary Inconsistencies. The more statements a person makes about their allegations of abuse, the greater chance there may be that inconsistencies in their statements will exist. Carefully compare affidavits against police reports or other records that may exist including statements appearing in child protection records or medical treatment reports.

• Expose Behavioral Inconsistencies. After domestic abuse has been alleged, it may be critical to point out that the victim acted inconsistently from the way a victim would have reacted. How much time elapsed between the alleged incidents of abuse and the complaint filed? Did the victim initiate friendly contact after the abusive incidents that are alleged? Did the victim allow parenting time after the abusive incidents alleged? Did the victim contact the police, parents, friends or any other individuals at the time or shortly after the alleged incident of abuse occurred? Who did the person call after the alleged incidents of abuse occurred?

• Expose Motivation to Fabricate. Any evidence that an alleged victim had a motive to lie is valuable. The most relevant evidence is independent evidence such as letters, e-mails or other documentation from the victim threatening a custody battle or implying that they may allege abuse has occurred.

• Challenge General Allegations. Allegations of abuse can often be rambling and generalized so that no specific dates or times are included. Such allegations may be challenges as too general in nature and insufficient to meet the burden of proving that abuse occurred with a preponderance of the evidence.

• Object to New Allegations. Many Court will not allow a victim to supplement her initial pleadings with new allegations at the time of the hearing. This often occurs where the victim’s initial allegations were generalized or where she feels that the case is not going well. An objection may be made that the testimony being presented is outside the scope of the original pleadings and, as a result, prejudices the defendant’s ability to respond. In many jurisdictions, such testimony may be excluded.

[Peridot]

Re: Advice for a friend with regards to an ongoing family law case.

Hi Askingforafriend,
It's a really tough situation and unfortunately all your friend can do is comply with any requests made by the Court, be as helpful as possible and jump through the hoops. It's not ideal when children miss seeing parents due to false allegations made by aggrieved ex's, but of course there are unfortunately scenarios when allegations are not false. I'm not suggesting this is the case here but you can appreciate the Court must take these allegations seriously to protect those children who are affected.
If it is proved these allegations are an attempt to frustrate contact then the Court does take a dim view on the person making the false allegation, which can be reflected in the eventual order that is made.
I don't know which services have been employed to investigate the allegations but it may be worth if CAFCASS or a social worker ae involved, contacting them to see about sending postcards to his child, if appropriate. Nothing inflammatory just Hi, Thinking of you, love you, what you've been up to of course without adding fuel to the fire.
If postcards are appropriate keep a copy so even if the card doesn't get given or read to the child then one day he can show them.