advice on law

[marionette]

an acquaintance of mine has had the following problems:
she has been declared a vulnerable adult.
despite having many skills she keeps finding herself being forced out of work due to harassment from co workers and others.
her husband has told her to take some time out, not to work
she suspects that her husband does not want her to work.
what would happen if he were to divorce her? (there are rumours that this is what he wants)
she is out of work, dependent on him and made to look incapable and lazy due to being unemployed. despite being capable and hard working.
she is not on any benefits as does not qualify however she has evolved from being someone (prior to marriage) hardworking, financially independent, with a pension and savings, debt free (whereas the husband was in debt, had no career) to someone who is deemed (by the husband and his friends) as 'unemployable', financially dependent on the husband and could fall into debt due to no savings or pension.
husband now has a career and savings and has paid off his debts.
everytime she gets a new job she is harassed and intimidated. the last job she had the co workers referred to her as 'crazy' and bullied her.
please advise where she would stand if her husband chose to leave her.

[Johnboy007]

Re: advice on law

Just who was it that declared her a vulnerable adult?
The husband?
Seems to me, if everything you say is true, is that this poor girl has lost all confidence in herself.
Seems strange that she was financially independent before marriage, and her husband was in debt, and now the roles are reversed.
Me thinks that he could be a control freak, making his wife a trembling wreck of a human being.
It's probably why, she gets harassed at work.
(The above statement is just my opinion, based on information by marrionette.)
If her husband were to divorce her, she would be entitled to half of all assets.
Probably would be a blessing for her if he did go for a divorce.

[marionette]

Re: advice on law

coupled with this, his family turned against her (he has a big family) she has been ostracised by her distant family and has not close family (her parents died), she is isolated in this respect. His family did everything to minimise her as far as work, family involvement, and any abilities she has to do things. When she was upset due to being raped they dismissed it as a lie and said that she was imagining things. As I said when she met him she was financially independent, confident, in a good job, healthy and happy. She moved to his country and all these things happened to her, she was raped, forced out of work, ostracised. when returning to her country she has had problems securing work and has been badly affected by what has happened to her.

[Johnboy007]

Re: advice on law

coupled with this, his family turned against her (he has a big family) she has been ostracised by her distant family and has not close family (her parents died), she is isolated in this respect. His family did everything to minimise her as far as work, family involvement, and any abilities she has to do things. When she was upset due to being raped they dismissed it as a lie and said that she was imagining things. As I said when she met him she was financially independent, confident, in a good job, healthy and happy. She moved to his country and all these things happened to her, she was raped, forced out of work, ostracised. when returning to her country she has had problems securing work and has been badly affected by what has happened to her.

This sounds rather complicated and way outside of my capabilities.
I would advise her to seek professional help.
Perhaps start of with her doctor, who may be able to assist in giving her the help needed.

[kurtwallace]

Re: advice on law

an acquaintance of mine has had the following problems:
she has been declared a vulnerable adult.
despite having many skills she keeps finding herself being forced out of work due to harassment from co workers and others.
her husband has told her to take some time out, not to work
she suspects that her husband does not want her to work.
what would happen if he were to divorce her? (there are rumours that this is what he wants)
she is out of work, dependent on him and made to look incapable and lazy due to being unemployed. despite being capable and hard working.
she is not on any benefits as does not qualify however she has evolved from being someone (prior to marriage) hardworking, financially independent, with a pension and savings, debt free (whereas the husband was in debt, had no career) to someone who is deemed (by the husband and his friends) as 'unemployable', financially dependent on the husband and could fall into debt due to no savings or pension.
husband now has a career and savings and has paid off his debts.
everytime she gets a new job she is harassed and intimidated. the last job she had the co workers referred to her as 'crazy' and bullied her.
please advise where she would stand if her husband chose to leave her.

It is really necessary that she takes an advice from a legal advisor and try to come out of this problem as she is very much genuine in whole matter.

[rtbm]

Re: advice on law

1. Never heard the expression 'vulnerable adult' before, but we're all vulnerable as people, one way or another.
2. This sounds like a case for constructive dismissal, should it come to that and the law would be on her side if she could prove harassment.
3. She needs a break, definitely, most likely from her husband, too, but maybe they need to sit down and talk things through?
4. Well, not work at that company since it isn't doing her any good.
5. She would need extensive support if he divorced her to guide her through it all. She will come out stronger as a person, too. Just make sure its known people are there for her and she needs encouragement to get support, too, from others, besides friends etcetera.
6. Whatever is making her being made to look lazy and incompetent needs further attention. Its not her fault. She needs to fight back against any potential aggressors and make it clear the position. Other than that, its nobody else's business.
7. Seems her husband is not supportive of her and comes across actually as a bully and what does it have to do with his friends? This individual is certainly not unemployable and whilst she is out of work, who else would she rely on? Doesn't she have a joint account with her husband? Not being funny, but the husband sounds unpleasant in some aspects. I wouldn't be happy, personally, to be in a relationship like this - your friend is better than this and she's being subjected to harassment, not just from work, but from family ties as well.
8. Good for the husband but its not right that she is mocked and made to look worse off just because her husband's done something like this - doesn't make her any less of a person - there's more to a person's worth than being able to do things like this.
9. She needs to learn to make a stand and tell management if she is being bullied - it is not allowed and her co workers in her last job should have been reprimanded for this.

In regards to where it would leave her if her husband left, I'd imagine she might find she'd be better off without him - that's me being honest. If it left her in difficulty, I'd advise she would need support from the relevant authorities, job support etc. but assurances that her support groups were still there for her (friends etc.).

[stevemLS]

Re: advice on law

I agree with both Wales and rtbm - as far as I know there is no such thing as a "declaration" that someone is vulnerable and whilst, of course, she can seek help any help will be based on her circumstances not her perceived status.

Good luck

[des8]

Re: advice on law

Hey peeps, note this thread has been dormant for 6 months and was restarted by one newbie KURTWALLACE whose sole desire was to post a link to "his?" law firm