Accused of harassment at work

[Sapphire]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Get yourself to the hospital or your doctors at least and get it noted that you are suffering and make sure you get treatment, any form of head injury is dangerous and you need sorting out, this will be ongoing and you need as much down in black and white that you can have.
Also get an appointment to see the manager of your store, tell him the absolute truth about the affair, and if you can print off or send him copies of all the texts between you and this woman, give a copy to the store manager, the coppers and keep a copy for yourself, hopefully they will show that she was a willing partner in the relationship and may even show that she pursued you as well.
Whatever you do don't feel guilty about any of this and don't give up your job, ask the manager if they have any other positions available for you, explain that you are worried about your safety working on the shop floor, and remember to mention that you are also worried about travelling to and from work, it could work out that they will organise for you to travel with a colleague.
Remember from now on this is war, don't feel bad about dropping her in it with the other half, don't feel bad about her getting in trouble at work, you must protect yourself and your job and also if you are that worried about being attacked again you can tell the police and they can help you get an injunction against them, plus if I remember rightly supply you with a panic button (Bluebottle will confirm or deny this hopefully).

[wales01man]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Must agree with Sapphire Look after yourself forget this women shes trouble aided by a thug hope he gets what he deserves PRISON

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Yes I agree, I do feel guilt but I'm young and got lead into a relationship I shouldn't of and now I'm the one suffering, I have to protect myself, what happens with her is not my business.

It may indeed get to a point where I need to prove a relationship, but my phone provider has said it's confidential?

Just to add his reason for assaulting me is because I was with his partner, but the relationship between me and his partner was over 2 months ago, so has he really got any excuses that could go in his favour?

Must also add what is in my statement, have stated that she had told me she was finished with him but that nay not of been the case

[Sapphire]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Yes I agree, I do feel guilt but I'm young and got lead into a relationship I shouldn't of and now I'm the one suffering, I have to protect myself, what happens with her is not my business.

Yes indeed you do need to protect yourself and you need to keep your job also, don't feel guilt just don't get involved with someone in that situation again, affairs are just not worth the hassle, it always ends up with at least one person getting hurt, its not big, its not clever and certainly not advisable. Yes your right it is not your business what happens to her now and I bet sure as eggs is eggs she's done it before and you're just a pawn in their game.

It may indeed get to a point where I need to prove a relationship, but my phone provider has said it's confidential?

Phone provider may well be right, but if you chose to give copies to the coppers and the manager that's your business because they are on your phone and therefore are your property, by all means double check with the coppers though.

Just to add his reason for assaulting me is because I was with his partner, but the relationship between me and his partner was over 2 months ago, so has he really got any excuses that could go in his favour?

There is no excuse for assault, there might be mitigating circumstances but that would have to be very extreme. For instance in France there is Crime of Passion, ie when a husband kills because of an affair but I do believe that it was cancelled many years ago as an excuse and has never been allowed over here.

Must also add what is in my statement, have stated that she had told me she was finished with him but that nay not of been the case

That will all come out in any statements that the police may take from her and him, hopefully they will ask when their relationship broke down, but don't worry if they don't say anyway, its your word against hers, and you make sure you tell them that she told you her relationship was over xxx months ago, all this could prove her to be a liar and a cheat and is all good for your case.

[bluebottle]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Get yourself to the hospital or your doctors at least and get it noted that you are suffering and make sure you get treatment, any form of head injury is dangerous and you need sorting out, this will be ongoing and you need as much down in black and white that you can have.
Also get an appointment to see the manager of your store, tell him the absolute truth about the affair, and if you can print off or send him copies of all the texts between you and this woman, give a copy to the store manager, the coppers and keep a copy for yourself, hopefully they will show that she was a willing partner in the relationship and may even show that she pursued you as well.
Whatever you do don't feel guilty about any of this and don't give up your job, ask the manager if they have any other positions available for you, explain that you are worried about your safety working on the shop floor, and remember to mention that you are also worried about travelling to and from work, it could work out that they will organise for you to travel with a colleague.
Remember from now on this is war, don't feel bad about dropping her in it with the other half, don't feel bad about her getting in trouble at work, you must protect yourself and your job and also if you are that worried about being attacked again you can tell the police and they can help you get an injunction against them, plus if I remember rightly supply you with a panic button (Bluebottle will confirm or deny this hopefully).

I'm surprised the police didn't insist you went to hospital. After the sort of assault you sustained, it is standard procedure to call the ambulance service and have an assault victim checked-over by a paramedic or Emergency Care Practitioner (ECP). Like Sapphire, I, too, am concerned about the symptoms you are now suffering and agree with her 100% that you would be best to go straight to A & E. The reason for this is because it may be necessary to carry out a CT Scan of your head to see if there has been any internal injury, especially to your cervical spine (neck). Therefore, it is vitally important you go to A & E and get checked-out. Let the police know before you go to A & E as they may want to meet you there or obtain a report from the doctor who examines you.

If the ex-boyfriend is on police bail, it is very likely he has been told to stay well clear of you. If he defies this, he will be in breach of his bail and liable to arrest without warrant. If you have any concerns about this person attacking you again, speak to the police. There are things they can do using existing legislation. Panic buttons are normally issued where there is a significant risk of harm or the person is under a Witness Protection Order.

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Went to the hospital, just some swelling and bruising so I'm in the clear though in pain.

He has still not been found so am living in fear as he will come at me again if he sees me.

I'm just worried that if it goes to court he may get away with it as I have been seeing his partner, though I did not realise as she told me she was not with him, lead up the garden path clearly!

Though when he assaulted me the relationship had been over from near 2 months and I did not provoke him in any way as it's clear on CCTV he attacked me from behind. Maybe I worry too much but I am genuinly scared for my own safety

[Sapphire]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

I am trying to say this gently to you..... you are over analysing this, you are not in the wrong here, although having an affair is not excusable, but the woman involved did tell you it was over didn't she ? You should not live in fear, get on the phone to the police who are dealing with this, explain your fear, tell them everything, and make sure that you emphasise how scared you are, they have to do something to protect you.
Have you spoken to your shop manager yet ?

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Yes she did tell me it was over, aswell as telling me it's over between us 2 months ago. Have just in the last hour found out she has moved him out of her home in the last week so he must of assaulted me looking for someone to blame and his not finished yet, his no where to be found so I'm staying indoors until I know he can't attack me again, even when arrested and then bailed he has nothing to lose if his lost his family and wil see me as the sole reason why.

The police have been useless getting passed from one person to another to then find out the officer dealing with my case is not on duty.

Have spoke to my manager, area manager and a member of HR, all supportive and understand I'm not comfatable returning to work just yet unless they can get me a transfer to another store

[Sapphire]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

I don't blame you not wanting to return to work, I do think a change of store is a great idea in the circumstances and please if you do move to a new store and you meet someone you like, make sure they are not married or attached for gods sakes, its amazing how much trouble it causes, I know I met my OH at work in 2000, he was still with his wife, apparently she wanted a divorce and when she found out about me she changed her mind, all hell let loose, so I do know what I'm talking about, anyways the upshot of it was we got married last June.

Hopefully Bluebottle will pop along soon and be able to advise further about getting more help from the coppers, I personally think that they have a duty to protect you from this guy and need reminding of the fact, he will know the best way to go about it.

[bluebottle]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

The ex-boyfriend is now a wanted person and if he is stopped by the police for any reason, he is likely to be arrested and taken into custody. As for him getting away with it in court, alleged provocation is not a defence or an excuse for ABH. As for him being bailed, I think that could be an issue the police may have, especially if he has previous convictions for violent behaviour, and they may ask a magistrates court to impose conditional bail or remand him into custody.

You sound as if you need counselling and I would suggest you get yourself off to your GP for referral for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which will help you come to terms with what has happened and move on. What you are suffering from is Post Traumatic Stress (PTS) and it needs dealing with quickly.

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Thank you your last paragraph makes sense, it's all happened in a short space of time and is very stressful thinking about what could happen next. Going to book a doctors appointment asap.

[bluebottle]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Thank you your last paragraph makes sense, it's all happened in a short space of time and is very stressful thinking about what could happen next. Going to book a doctors appointment asap.

Glad to hear it. CBT is very good for dealing with PTS.

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Gone ahead with getting counciling, shall see how that goes

had a meeting with my manager, area manager and HR. They say they can't do much more to help me as it is a personal issue and can't keep paying me for having time off. A transfer has been suggested but I will go from being shift manager to sales assistant. Are they allowed to in a way demote me? It means I would be taking less money which I wouldn't want.

I cant return to my workplace until I am sure I am not in any danger, they have said they can ban him from the shop but it's no guarentee it won't happen again.

[Bradersn]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Have decided to stay where I am.

I feel as if my workplace are pushing me to return to work and I am not ready. I let my manager know that I will stay at the store and I'm put on the rota to work a Saturday night, I don't feel safe in the shop and the police have informed me they need to get all the evidence before they make an arrest, could be days. A week or a month.

Is a tempory transfer an option that can be taken up?

My store are short on staff due to people leaving and new staff are yet to come in so I feel as if I'm being pushed back into work where I don't feel safe to make up numbers.

The police cannot offer 24/7 protection and the store will not employ someone to somewhat guard the shop despite the fact this could happen again and a lot of stock goes missing. Just ned to know what my rights are, I'm not ready to return to work so do I ask my doctor to sign me off?

[bluebottle]

Re: Accused of harassment at work

Tesco are known for treating their employees badly and for lying to employees and customers alike. The incident happened will you were at work, on Tesco premises and Tesco are, apart from you exercising responsibility for your own health and safety, 100% responsible for your health and safety whilst you are at work for them. They cannot wriggle out of that responsibility. It is enshrined within Section 2, Health & Safety at Work 1974 (Ensuring Safe Working Environment). Do you know if this was recorded in the Accident Book and reported to the Health & Safety Inspectors at the local authority's Environmental Health Department? I am also wondering if this is reportable under RIDDOR (Reporting of Incidents, Diseases and Dangerous Occurrences Regulations) (Hope I got that right!) in which case Tesco are legally-required to submit a report.

I am going to ask Miliitant, who is an expert in Employment Law, to look in on this thread and advise on the legality of Tesco's response and excuses.