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Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

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  • Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

    My son, aged 15, was stopped in Sainsbury's for shoplifting. On Monday he had been caught on camera shoplifting (a magazine and can of coke) but was not stopped. The guard followed him round the store on Tuesday and saw him pocket a packet of batteries. He stopped him in the store and the police were called. Police called his school to tell them of the arrest. They also called my husband.

    Son was told he had two choices - 1) go to court and face imprisonment. 2) repay the amount he had stolen, be banned from the store and allow the police to go to his school. At the school they would speak to his class about shoplifting and he would be expected to tell his classmates about the experience. Son was terrified of imprisonment, husband was very angry and felt humiliation would do the trick so they chose number 2. Husband was told the local police would hold details of the theft, but it would be wiped at 18. Son would not have to tell uni's, employers or visa applications about the arrest. Son and husband were not provided with copies of the paperwork. They were not provided with the opportunity to speak to a solicitor or even time to think about what they were signing.

    I was at work so heard about this when husband called me. I was not happy about the class humiliation aspect. The school called husband to discuss what had happened and said they would not allow the class visit. Husband has just had a call from a PCSO asking why we are breaking the agreement and warning son could be charged and face imprisonment if we do not follow the criteria. Husband explained our concerns and PCSO offered to amend the punishment to son writing an account of his experience which would be anonymously read out in assembly by the PCSO. I am still not comfortable with the humiliation aspect and I do not trust the police to keep it anonymous. Husband thinks we should agree as he is worried about case going to court.

    Son has been punished by us. He has been punished by the school, as he was in uniform so brought the school into disrepute. He is banned from the store. He was mortified by the whole experience to such an extent he has had nightmares every night since getting caught. He has had to pay the shop for the goods. Am I wrong in thinking the school visit aspect is taking things too far? Does anyone have suggestions as to how we should handle the situation? Does anyone know what this scheme is called and whether it really will get wiped at 18? How do I get copies of the paperwork from the police?

    We have also received a letter from the local retail watch group. They say the police have notified them of the arrest and they have informed their members. After a meeting it was decided to issue my son with a formal warning and some stores may decide to ban him. Does my son have any right to confidentiality?
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  • #2
    Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

    I think he will learn a lot from this and never do something like it again.
    the threat of imprisonment for this is beyond belief

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

      IMO the reaction has been well over the top.
      The threat of imprisonment, a tactic to scare doubtless, cannot be right and the PCSO's actions are unbelievable.
      I have PM'd one of our other members to ask him to look at your post.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

        If in referring to imprisonment on this scenario I think it should have been stated as " youth detention centre" this silly lad is only 15.
        A local "remedy" i.e. writing an apology to the store manager and being banned for a period or only being allowed in the store accompanied by an adult would be more reasonable.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

          I wonder if the reason why there is no paperwork is because someone has exceeded their authority. A PCSO is not in a position to advise someone - particularly a minor will be imprisoned. First port of call methinks is the Duty inspector at the local nick and see what he makes of it. I don't doubt someone at the front desk will try to fob you off but stick to your guns and demand to speak to the person in charge.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

            I think that the police are enabled to administer conditional reprimands (equivalent to adult cautions) and this type of thing might have been covered by that.

            However, there are rules about involving the Youth Offending Team and who and how it may be administered. It most certainly is not a PCSO in Sainsbury's or wherever it was.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

              Thank you for your comments and help. It has been a stressful week and it is a relief to be able to ask questions and get responses.

              I want my son to fully understand what he has done and never do it again. However, I am worried about the affect a public confession could have on his mental health and how the other teenagers may react. My son was bullied throughout year 8. He has only just started to feel comfortable at school and has begun making friends. I fear everyone knowing will lead to more bullying and isolation. The teenage years are hard and he is really struggling through them. I think it will just be too much for him. I am also worried about his siblings getting labelled and bullied as they attend the same school.

              I have already told him he has to write letters of apology to the shop, the school and to us. I am happy to take any other advice or means to stop him ever doing this again. I even asked the police if he could be taken to the station and spend time in the cells, but they said they cannot do that anymore. I just don't want him being pushed to a break down, self harming or suicide. I feel this school situation could result in one of those actions.

              I am wondering whether this is a Sainsbury's scheme and the police are supporting it as an easy option for them to deal with the situation.

              Edit: Husband has just confirmed it was a police form, not one from Sainsburys. After talking to my son and husband one of the Police Officers went and got the form.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

                Bit of a tedious read, AJ, but this is the Ministry of Justice Guidance on juvenile cautions.

                It might help you in your discussion with the police.

                https://www.justice.gov.uk/downloads...-yots-oocd.pdf

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

                  Originally posted by AJIYT395 View Post
                  Thank you for your comments and help. It has been a stressful week and it is a relief to be able to ask questions and get responses.

                  I want my son to fully understand what he has done and never do it again. However, I am worried about the affect a public confession could have on his mental health and how the other teenagers may react. My son was bullied throughout year 8. He has only just started to feel comfortable at school and has begun making friends. I fear everyone knowing will lead to more bullying and isolation. The teenage years are hard and he is really struggling through them. I think it will just be too much for him. I am also worried about his siblings getting labelled and bullied as they attend the same school.

                  I have already told him he has to write letters of apology to the shop, the school and to us. I am happy to take any other advice or means to stop him ever doing this again. I even asked the police if he could be taken to the station and spend time in the cells, but they said they cannot do that anymore. I just don't want him being pushed to a break down, self harming or suicide. I feel this school situation could result in one of those actions.

                  I am wondering whether this is a Sainsbury's scheme and the police are supporting it as an easy option for them to deal with the situation.

                  Edit: Husband has just confirmed it was a police form, not one from Sainsburys. After talking to my son and husband one of the Police Officers went and got the form.
                  I know this isn't what you are asking, but do you think the shoplifting is connected with the bullying and a means for your son of coping psychologically and emotionally? Teenagers do resort to many self destructive behaviours in order to try to get some feeling of control over their lives and to cope with a hurtful and unfair world.

                  If it were my son I would ask for a referral to CAMHS, in case his teenage troubles are greater - hence he may need more support - than "normal". This might also have the merit of getting the police/Sainsburys to BACK OFF. Talk about a sledgehammer to crack a walnut.

                  Good luck x

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

                    I don't know what the law states, but I cannot believe it allows for a child / young adult to be humiliated in this way; it is quite simply wrong in my opinion.

                    There is no doubt what your son did was wrong and I applaud you for recognising this and supporting some sort of sanction, formal or otherwise - many wouldn't. However, I think Ploddertom may have hit the nail on the head when he mentioned about authority being exceeded.

                    I would be asking for a copy of the paperwork from the police to see what is on record. I hope the links below may be of help, and agree with you totally that public humiliation could potentially have a lifelong effect on your son's mental wellbeing. Such cases are very well documented.

                    https://www.gov.uk/courts/youth-courts

                    http://www.bbc.co.uk/schools/pshe_an...nile_crime.pdf

                    Good luck! I'm sure your son has learnt his lesson, but I wish him and you well.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Shoplifting Humiliation Punishment

                      The OP needs to speak to the Station Superintendent at the police station involved in this matter.

                      From what I have read, the matter has not exactly been handled very competently by the police and it has the whiff of the police dancing to the retailer's tune. The police are supposed to act independently in such a situation, not behave like nodding dogs on the back parcel shelf of a car and agree with and accede to the retailer's demands.
                      Life is a journey on which we all travel, sometimes together, but never alone.

                      Comment

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