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Fiscal disarray has been the recurring theme of Graham Snowdon's existence, until now. But how do you begin to reverse a lifetime of consumer mismanagement?
The heap of neglected bills, bank statements and other correspondence sits festering on my bedside unit. I stare at it hoping it might disappear – or at least get smaller – by sheer force of will, but it refuses to budge. I pull open a drawer; the pile creaks menacingly, then lurches forwards, depositing a mini-avalanche of post all over my socks. I've been putting this off for far too long.
At some point in the last few weeks (or is it months?) the issue of confronting the pile has moved beyond merely one of filing away a bit of personal finance-related correspondence. I have actually started to worry that the pile might eat me in my sleep. It is time for me to confront this consumer nightmare before it consumes me. So I draw the curtains, take the phone off the hook and prepare to face my enemy.
The pile contains, in no particular order: three credit card statements (one unopened); three bank statements; one mobile phone bill (unopened) with a mysterious 24-digit number scrawled across the back; one letter from a childcare scheme operator (unopened until now but which, I discover, contains my membership card); two gas supply statements; a letter from my optician (who is refusing to release my contact lenses until I get my eyes retested); one pension statement (unopened); two payslips; one home insurance renewal proposal; a letter from one phone company disconnecting our landline; a letter from another phone company reconnecting our landline; a free one-month trial with a DVD rental firm (woo hoo!); and two fee statements from my son's nursery.
I like my son's nursery – they are always sending us statements in the names of other children who attend the nursery on completely different days. They are the only people I know who are worse at admin than I am.
But it is time to put an end to this shameful state of affairs. From now on, I have resolved, I will try to do better at managing my family's consumer affairs. I will read our bank statements and file them away neatly. I will monitor my energy bills more closely and switch tariffs if necessary – one bill says we used £24.41 of gas in one quarter, rising to £207.79 in the next. Even I can see that's a surprisingly large variation. And I will personally visit the nursery and get them to sort those statements once and for all.
I stack my bills into a big fat paper Jenga tower and carry them carefully downstairs, where our filing cabinet awaits. But there's another problem: the filing cabinet is overflowing with years of neglected correspondence and the drawers won't even shut. Disheartened, I plonk the tower of bills back on the bedside unit and stomp off to watch TV. Clearly, this is going to take some time.
I am overwhelmed. Where should I start? Any suggestions gratefully received ...
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