Child custody dispute

[Linus]

Re: Child custody dispute

Hi. It's been a week and I'm getting there... still in shock at times, other times, I can rationalise it. I think the deciding factor was that I was not forcing Mel to see her dad. They think that because I hate her dad and have said derogatory things about him, that it has rubbed off onto her which is why she doesn't like going to his. They see this as emotional abuse. She appears to have settled there, which makes me both happy and sad. Happy because I couldn't bare to think she's not happy, but sad because it makes me think she won't want to come home (I still see this as her home) I am starting Anger Management on Monday and seeing a psychiatrist about a 'managing emotions' course tomorrow. I'm still waiting for social services to get back to me about starting a parenting course.
Can I ask, if I complete these courses and after 6 months or so, my daughter is still not settled, do I stand any chance at all of getting her back??

That is really good news and fantastic that there is help out there for you. Mental health provision is something of a postcode lottery I am afraid. As for the questions I am sorry I can not answer them.

Do you still have contact and is it supervised or unsupervised . If it is anything other than unsupervised, the first move is getting to that point in my opinion . Maybe [MENTION=87380]Diana M[/MENTION] [MENTION=15129]Crazy council[/MENTION] could help or [MENTION=49370]Kati[/MENTION] could point you in the right direction

[Daisyberwick]

Re: Child custody dispute

I have unsupervised contact. Every 3 weeks, I get to spend a day with her. In December it will go back to court to arrange her coming to mine for the weekends. I know she's unhappy. At what stage will they listen to her?

[Daisyberwick]

Re: Child custody dispute

Also. I'm supposed to encourage her to want to stay with him and settle in, but I cannot allow her to think I don't love her or want her. Any advice on this would be very much appreciated.

[Crazy council]

Re: Child custody dispute

Hi

I truly understand some of the stuff your thinking/feeling due to being there for other reasons back in 2009. The only way to deal with these type situations is to play along with social and court welfare, push them to set up what you need. You should encourage her, hard as it seems, just so the SS can not see any dispute. The best advise i can offer, do whatever Social service need, then try sort out agreement with teh farther, if not, apply to court to vary the order, You have to make sure, you clear all the SS hurdles first. Sometime you have to push them to make arraignment.

[Daisyberwick]

Re: Child custody dispute

Thank you for the peace of mind that everyone is giving me. I plan the tow the line in every way. I saw a psychiatrist today and she was fantastic, though a little harsh which is what I needed. I know no one can give me any definitive answers, but at least I can see a way forward. Thank you all.

[Daisyberwick]

Re: Child custody dispute

Hi. Well I'm well and truly into my courses, although SS are still dragging their feet with regards to the parenting course. I am going to take the initiative and go on a private course. My daughter still wants to come home. She has not settled like they predicted she would. If my daughter gets a chance to speak to the judge in December, how likely is it that she will be listened to. My courses finish in March. Kind regards