Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

[FlamingParrot]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Ha! I think I'm going to go see my folks...they live in a far away land, a hundred miles away in the wilderness where the internet is a thing of the future, only to be seen on television and in movies!

Surely if they can watch telly they can also get internet! Are there any places these days where you don't get internet at all? :eek2:

I must check out this "Sliding Doors"...

Most definitely! Well worth watching and should take your mind off things as it's a nice and rather lighthearted romcom.:violin: See here ---> http://www.movie2k.to/Sliding-Doors-...e-1166255.html
At least it's all over now!eace: Enjoy! :tea:

[FlamingParrot]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

FP,,where are you banned from ??

It's probably not very well known as it's not one of the big consumer forums out there: All About Debt. :nod:

[Inca]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

I actually knew the flipping answer FP,,been told before,,the old memory isn't what it was lol

[PlanB]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Most definitely! Well worth watching and should take your mind off things as it's a nice and rather lighthearted romcom.:violin: See here ---> http://www.movie2k.to/Sliding-Doors-...e-1166255.html Enjoy! :tea:

Gosh, can I download that and watch it for free or will that make me a pirate :fencing:

[GettingScrewed]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Ok, so at this point I'm snowed in and can't even go visit my family in the ass-end of nowhere! What a miserable day all around. It's like I'm being mocked with a blanket of white that forbids me to leave. It's there and new and pure and it begs me to make new footprints in a new direction, a blank canvas from above, but it's cold and wet and windy! Brrrrrr!

I could go to the bar and get drunk...I probably should but this does not alleviate my problems. I know there's Whiskey around here somewhere...

[MissFM]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Whether there's whiskey or not do get down writing - (I daren't now mention Catharsis!) but IMHO creativity is the true philosopher's stone and with it you can turn base metal into gold - as you've proved. x

[GettingScrewed]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Ah the lovely MissFM! There is another person in our small little family. My employer, his girlfriend, myself and another friend who has just contacted me. He's pretty angry at mt now former employer and the two of us are going for a few beers...(won't this end well), the situation just gets more complicated though. He knew the girl in question and always disliked her in terms of how she treated me. A family of four brought together 8/9 years ago now stand divided, and me unemployed. How the hell did this happen?

I feel like my next step is surely a huge one. It will not define me but could be a step in the right direction or two steps backwards in the wrong direction. I'm at the door of an airplane, I'm holding on to the door with white knuckles and I'm about to let go...and to be honest I'm not sure I want to know if this parachute is going to open or not!

[MissFM]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Steady on the tiller there GS - time to move on! I'm going to turn in shortly - WAS going to have a hot water bottle cos it's bloody freezing here but am in two minds after what I've learnt here today. x

[CleverClogs]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

This is awesome! I was at the University of North Dakota and had lectures with Greg Gagnon and Dr. Donald Fixaco who was Clinton's head of Indian Affairs in the US during his term in office. The People of North and South Dakota do refer to themselves as the Sioux...though the stereotypical mascot thing is up for debate. UND's Hockey team is the Fighting Sioux and the $150 million dollar hockey arena was funded by a guy named Ralph Englestad. He threatened to remove his funding and maintenance if they removed the team name.

I'm sure there's a joke in there, somewhere, about boys named Sioux.

[CleverClogs]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Steady on the tiller there GS - time to move on! I'm going to turn in shortly - WAS going to have a hot water bottle cos it's bloody freezing here but am in two minds after what I've learnt here today. x

Quite.

Klismaphilia isn't for everyone; for example, I believe I'd find it a washout.

[MissFM]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

Hello GS - How's it going? :usa2:

[GettingScrewed]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.


Hi MissFM, how's things? I'm in the far away land where the internet is a magic trick, so I'm at my sister's now as I send this...

So as I sat in the car with my parents today, snow falling, theonly reprieve from the deafening silence being Lionel Richie’s piano filled “HelloIs It Me You’re Looking For?” on the radio, I had a terrible sinking feeling.It was the worst I have ever felt. A sense of regret for the mistakes I made,for the unrelenting trust I gave and for perhaps being too lenient on thepeople involved in my public execution. I felt sorry for my employer too,though I feel there is just as much of my blood on his hands as the girl thatcaused this.
I think that I have no direction to turn from here. I thinkthat there are any options. I find as the more time I am removed from thesituation though, the more time I have to think about the whole ordeal, theangrier I become. Basically the girl made accusations against me and I lost myjob…albeit I quit, though the result was the same. I was given no support inthe matter and my employer/friend actually told me he was advised to dismiss meand just “pay a fine” if need be. It was just as I had feared that I was aconviction waiting to happen. My fears were justified.

My question at this point is do I have any options? I meanafter I resigned? I did so because I didn’t want the mark against me name but haveI any legal comeback from this point? I can hardly claim unfair dismissal butcan I claim anything? I will probably call a solicitor on Monday, but is thereany point or am I wasting time on an already finished situation?

I was treated so badly during through the entire thing. Ihad suggested article 44 of the ACAS procedures that stated the meeting perhapsbe suspended if I raised a grievance based on the fact I disagreed with her statementsand I was told that I had no right to do that. I also suggested that I wasbeing ‘vicariously harassed’ and this too didn’t seem to carry much weight. It’sa done deal at this point, and in the end I was a friend to my friend one lasttime which is more than he did for me. I am not becoming bitter and aspreviously stated I will not even ‘hate’ the girl, though I find it unfair thata single person can have a disagreement, make a complaint of harassment and I’mjust sunk with no one willing to hear my version of events. It seems as soon asshe said it I was done.

I think what botheredmy employer too was that the staff basically told him that I run the place.That he might sign the checks, cross the T’s and dot the I’s but I ran theplace. I think that didn’t sit well with him. I mean how could any employerlike to hear that. A train of thought he himself had helped perpetuate bytelling a staff member once that she was “lucky that he was standing in frontof her and not someone else”. This is based on discipline alone. He was alwayshappy for me to get my hands dirty for him, but then didn’t like the fact thatI got more respect for it.

I any appreciate any advice anyone can give me from thispoint?

Thanks…

[MissFM]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

GS

As a purely personal observation - someone who wishes you well (very well indeed) but has no expertise on the legal issues: it is obvious that you are a talented and charismatic person - I believe you should cut your losses and move on (I've told you many times where I think you could have a new career) - but even if you don't do that you must not let this situation, which is now in the past, poison your life, become an obsession and poison your future. :croc:

[PlanB]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

I went for the 'outcome' today. I was informed that all notes were not typed and asked if I wanted to postpone the meeting. I said no "let's just do it". My employer asked to speak to me privately for a moment before the meeting. This then was off the record. I spoke with him and he told me that he was going to dismiss me. He then asked if I would like to quit? We talked as friends for a while . . . .

I was waiting for you to say that you may have been a little hasty in quitting your job yesterday. Who says you resigned? Did you put it in writing or did this take place in that private and off the record chat? And was the "disciplinary meeting" flawed if the notes (which were the company's evidence against you) weren't even typed up for you to see as admitted by your boss. You were in an emotional state without representation and a boss who may have been putting you under pressure to quit so as to save himself from the awkward situation (he was a personal family friend).That doesn't sound like a lawful disciplinary hearing to me :nono:

I think you need legal advice on Monday morning. Hopefully someone on here can point you in the right direction of a free helpline to establish your rights. Why wasn't mediation offered to you for starters?

[FlamingParrot]

Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.

It may be possible to claim Constructive Dismissal if the OP had no option but to resign -> http://www.worksmart.org.uk/rights/c...tive_dismissal