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Re: Accused of Harassment and Bullying...Please help.
Wow, didn’t this carried away? :o
Yes MissFM I had my meeting today, he had a statement based on the girl’s first interview and then a second based on my interview…after my first interview. She had said lots of things that I disagreed with, lots of things that could be cross-referenced in what I had to say but her version was completely different. An example would be….and let me set the scene, I have about 3,000 text messages on my phone from her, we go between call each other friendly names, not so friendly names, curse at each other, yet all in good humour, went drinking together, knew intimate things about each other, we were comfortable around each other is what I’m saying. We were friends.
In work I would make an informed yet witty comment and she would punch me, or she would kick me…and in case you never went to high school, that means the other person likes you. They feel a level of comfort and security, certainly not a threat to their safety. She walked out of the room one day and I asked her to sit down, I put my hand on her shoulder and said “Sit down will you man?” She said that she was forced onto the chair!!!
She said I interfered and was part of the reason her past relationship broke up…not this one…not the previous one …not, wait…yeah that one? I contested how can I interfere when she texts me at 4:30am and informs me she’s crying on the streets of the city because she just had a fist fight with the guy and knocked him on his ass? I am not interfering, I am invited to the table…and what are you doing with such a glass-jawed man?!
We’ve had our arguments, and anyone that could have stepped forward seemed to favour her more than me, though some people did say she’s not all that innocent.
In terms of unwanted gifts, I asked how can you eat with someone, ask them for advice and accept a gift from them 2 weeks earlier then not accept something? 2 weeks difference with no reason why in between? The ‘it’ was hot water bottle; “Keep yourself warm kid” was what I told her. She’s constantly shivering and coughing.
On 2 separate occasions as she fainted, I caught her and put her in a seated position. Apparently she has high blood pressure and is prone to fainting. The second time, as she was leaving work the day she collapsed, I sat with her, gave her water, and even though she told me not to do so, I phoned her family and informed them. I had no idea where she was going or who with but I was pretty sure she was going out for drinks. I was informed today that she blamed me for her faints, and had titled them ‘panic’ attacks. This girl…this girl does NOT suffer from panic attacks!
I think I’ll change my member name from GettingScrewed to GotScrewed. I affirmed that in this scenario I am the victim of young girl’s vendetta. I was Captain of the Titanic and she rode on back as a willing passenger enjoying every benefit along the way. Then when the supplies began to dry up, those being her holidays and privileges, she wasn’t happy about it. She stopped getting her own way. Then when the bar finally ran dry with the words I’m finished with you and I’m doing nothing more for you, she decided to jump ship, swim up ahead and push an iceberg in front of me. She has tried to sink me. This is no less than what has happened here.
Everyone seems really nice here and really keen to offer advice. There is no smoke without fire, we’ve had our arguments…but I think I’m ‘GettingScrewed’. My employer who I’ve stated was a close friend and I stayed in the room for a while afterwards. We had a conversation that we should not have had. He said he felt like crying, I could see it in his eyes. He is the same age as me and asked for none of this. I felt like just packing up and walking out. I know more cut-throat people will see me as soft in my position, but all I could do was apologise, pat him on the shoulder and watched his slumped posture add to the weight on my shoulders. That conversation will never leave that room regardless of any decision he makes. I owe him that.
My biggest mistake seems to be keeping all the nice things I did for her on the quiet. So when we argued people only witnessed that, that was all they could refer to seeing. She knows this I guess, I really have done so much for the kid. I’ve heard “She owes me”, I distinctly remember telling her after she stated “I owe you such much” that “You owe me nothing”. All I ever asked was she get her grades. I stated in my meeting
I did not berate her, if anything I complimented her work ethic and her abilities. I said I liked the girl, called her “fantastic” and described her as possessing an inexorable quality. In fact from the beginning of my friendship with her I noticed her potential. I attempted to take this girl that didn’t seem to realise her positive attributes and suggest she draw confidence from them, that she was more than just average. It is my personal opinion that the reason the younger generation seem so average is that they don’t care, and more to the point, they don’t see a reason to care. The moment you give a young person a reason to care, you have opened the door to their infinite potential. It’s one thing to tell a young person something making it stick, but it’s another thing entirely to make that young person think they came up with the idea on their own, thereby promoting confidence and self-assurance.
Thanks for you’re support everyone. Maybe not just time yet to get a new necktie that hangs from the ceiling.
Wow, didn’t this carried away? :o
Yes MissFM I had my meeting today, he had a statement based on the girl’s first interview and then a second based on my interview…after my first interview. She had said lots of things that I disagreed with, lots of things that could be cross-referenced in what I had to say but her version was completely different. An example would be….and let me set the scene, I have about 3,000 text messages on my phone from her, we go between call each other friendly names, not so friendly names, curse at each other, yet all in good humour, went drinking together, knew intimate things about each other, we were comfortable around each other is what I’m saying. We were friends.
In work I would make an informed yet witty comment and she would punch me, or she would kick me…and in case you never went to high school, that means the other person likes you. They feel a level of comfort and security, certainly not a threat to their safety. She walked out of the room one day and I asked her to sit down, I put my hand on her shoulder and said “Sit down will you man?” She said that she was forced onto the chair!!!
She said I interfered and was part of the reason her past relationship broke up…not this one…not the previous one …not, wait…yeah that one? I contested how can I interfere when she texts me at 4:30am and informs me she’s crying on the streets of the city because she just had a fist fight with the guy and knocked him on his ass? I am not interfering, I am invited to the table…and what are you doing with such a glass-jawed man?!
We’ve had our arguments, and anyone that could have stepped forward seemed to favour her more than me, though some people did say she’s not all that innocent.
In terms of unwanted gifts, I asked how can you eat with someone, ask them for advice and accept a gift from them 2 weeks earlier then not accept something? 2 weeks difference with no reason why in between? The ‘it’ was hot water bottle; “Keep yourself warm kid” was what I told her. She’s constantly shivering and coughing.
On 2 separate occasions as she fainted, I caught her and put her in a seated position. Apparently she has high blood pressure and is prone to fainting. The second time, as she was leaving work the day she collapsed, I sat with her, gave her water, and even though she told me not to do so, I phoned her family and informed them. I had no idea where she was going or who with but I was pretty sure she was going out for drinks. I was informed today that she blamed me for her faints, and had titled them ‘panic’ attacks. This girl…this girl does NOT suffer from panic attacks!
I think I’ll change my member name from GettingScrewed to GotScrewed. I affirmed that in this scenario I am the victim of young girl’s vendetta. I was Captain of the Titanic and she rode on back as a willing passenger enjoying every benefit along the way. Then when the supplies began to dry up, those being her holidays and privileges, she wasn’t happy about it. She stopped getting her own way. Then when the bar finally ran dry with the words I’m finished with you and I’m doing nothing more for you, she decided to jump ship, swim up ahead and push an iceberg in front of me. She has tried to sink me. This is no less than what has happened here.
Everyone seems really nice here and really keen to offer advice. There is no smoke without fire, we’ve had our arguments…but I think I’m ‘GettingScrewed’. My employer who I’ve stated was a close friend and I stayed in the room for a while afterwards. We had a conversation that we should not have had. He said he felt like crying, I could see it in his eyes. He is the same age as me and asked for none of this. I felt like just packing up and walking out. I know more cut-throat people will see me as soft in my position, but all I could do was apologise, pat him on the shoulder and watched his slumped posture add to the weight on my shoulders. That conversation will never leave that room regardless of any decision he makes. I owe him that.
My biggest mistake seems to be keeping all the nice things I did for her on the quiet. So when we argued people only witnessed that, that was all they could refer to seeing. She knows this I guess, I really have done so much for the kid. I’ve heard “She owes me”, I distinctly remember telling her after she stated “I owe you such much” that “You owe me nothing”. All I ever asked was she get her grades. I stated in my meeting
I did not berate her, if anything I complimented her work ethic and her abilities. I said I liked the girl, called her “fantastic” and described her as possessing an inexorable quality. In fact from the beginning of my friendship with her I noticed her potential. I attempted to take this girl that didn’t seem to realise her positive attributes and suggest she draw confidence from them, that she was more than just average. It is my personal opinion that the reason the younger generation seem so average is that they don’t care, and more to the point, they don’t see a reason to care. The moment you give a young person a reason to care, you have opened the door to their infinite potential. It’s one thing to tell a young person something making it stick, but it’s another thing entirely to make that young person think they came up with the idea on their own, thereby promoting confidence and self-assurance.
Thanks for you’re support everyone. Maybe not just time yet to get a new necktie that hangs from the ceiling.
)
It's my turn. I'm old enough to be your mother so please take what I say as well-meaning.
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