Originally posted by bluebottle
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Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
gottle, farrrrt of faaaarrrrt gear fffaaarrrt
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
Also known as Lower Gastro-Intestinal Ventriloquism.Originally posted by bizzybob View Postin his case his anus is doing the talking... CleverClogs

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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
Strangely, that's what a lot of police officers called the CPS when it first came into being. The other one was the Clown Prosecution Service, due to the inept and incompetent way in which CPS handled cases in court. It could be excruciatingly embarrassing watching CPS completely mess-up a case in front of a magistrates court.Originally posted by CleverClogs View PostI rather doubt that the Criminal Protection Service would.
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
The OP has a defence that they genuinely believed the bailiff had removed the wheelclamp due to his non-compliance with correct legal procedures, i.e. no Clamping Order.Originally posted by bizzybob View PostYou should be OK then, in any case if he just clamped it and ran, and left no notice of seizure you can assume it wasn't actually seized, in which case it and in any case it has not been stolen sio the bailiff has lied to the police, in order to put you under undue duress, either way so long as you pay when you said you will there is not much he can do.
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
in his case his anus is doing the talking as in spouting excrement to police regarding stolen cars, but other than that I agree you have a point CleverClogsOriginally posted by CleverClogs View PostHe isn't.
One's anus is useful, as it provides the means to retain turds and, when appropriate, to expel them.
He seems to have no useful purpose whatever.
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Guest repliedRe: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
He must have finished the doughnuts by now!Originally posted by kim481 View PostThe policeman has not said I can't drive it. It was a brief call with him as he was dealing with something important at the time and he said he would call back. That was at 11.30 but I haven't heard anything back from him yet
msl:
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Guest repliedRe: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
I rather doubt that the Criminal Protection Service would.Originally posted by bluebottle View PostWhether CPS would put a certificated bailiff up in front of a magistrates court is another matter.
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Guest repliedRe: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
He isn't.Originally posted by bizzybob View PostThe bailiff is being an anus,
One's anus is useful, as it provides the means to retain turds and, when appropriate, to expel them.
He seems to have no useful purpose whatever.
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Guest repliedRe: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
I see no reason why you shouldn't use it. If you're afraid of being stopped for driving a stolen vehicle, take your driving licence. The police can soon tell whether it is yours and whether or not it is insured, so I wouldn't worry too much about that.
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
You should be OK then, in any case if he just clamped it and ran, and left no notice of seizure you can assume it wasn't actually seized, in which case it and in any case it has not been stolen sio the bailiff has lied to the police, in order to put you under undue duress, either way so long as you pay when you said you will there is not much he can do.Originally posted by kim481 View PostThe policeman has not said I can't drive it. It was a brief call with him as he was dealing with something important at the time and he said he would call back. That was at 11.30 but I haven't heard anything back from him yet
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
The policeman has not said I can't drive it. It was a brief call with him as he was dealing with something important at the time and he said he would call back. That was at 11.30 but I haven't heard anything back from him yet
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
Brilliant, "he whirdled the ladies and scroped all the men, then he straddled his nadger and rode off again" From The Black Grunger of HounslowOriginally posted by MissFM View Posthttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dct_VJNLvAk where's a cleverclogs when you need him?
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dct_VJNLvAk where's a cleverclogs when you need him?Originally posted by bizzybob View PostThey come from the double entendre of a Kenneth Williams character, so we can use our imagination.
But seriously, the bailiff in this case needs to be brought up quick smart by the copper he tried to mislead.
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
Did the policeman, say you could not drive it?, take your insurance docs with you, but I cant see any reason why you shouldn't drive the car, as the bailiff hasn't even given you any notice of seizure, if you were stopped and arrested for theft, you would be in line for a claim for unlawful detention, and the bailiff would have some explaining to do.Originally posted by kim481 View PostWell you have all put a smile on my face with your comments and I had a little chuckle. I haven't heard anymore from the policeman yet so I can not update on the situation. In sure he had better things to do with his time!
Do you think I am safe to drive the car as he said it is reported stolen and I have to take children to school tomorrow and go to work? Should I take my v5 and insurance documents with me as proof of ownership?
It is ridiculous I feel uneasy and unsafe in my own home and I am scared and worried to drive my car!! All because of a few missed tv licence payments!
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Re: Marston bailiff clamped my car!!
Well you have all put a smile on my face with your comments and I had a little chuckle. I haven't heard anymore from the policeman yet so I can not update on the situation. In sure he had better things to do with his time!
Do you think I am safe to drive the car as he said it is reported stolen and I have to take children to school tomorrow and go to work? Should I take my v5 and insurance documents with me as proof of ownership?
It is ridiculous I feel uneasy and unsafe in my own home and I am scared and worried to drive my car!! All because of a few missed tv licence payments!
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