Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

[Baxter]

Hi all,
My Son recently went off the rails after splitting with his girlfriend of 5 years, they were living together had a row and that was the final nail in the coffin, she moved out and he did'nt take it well, in fact he was devastated, and found his comfort getting together with his pals and partying for the last 5 months, last week he went into meltdown when he started to panic after losing his job, savings gone, and debts he cant pay,
Ive written letters for him to his credit card companies, explaining that hes no longer working and to make an agreement reduce repayments and freeze interest.
2 keep making demands and said that they have not had any letter about his circumstances, and the other 2 are threatening him with allsorts and how much they will add onto his debt,
He also got 2 new settee's from land of leather 12 months ago which he intended at the time to pay off after the interest free period, but now he cant, the finance co said they were bringing a van to collect it and hes worried sick. Ive told him that they cant just come and take them away and not to let them in if they did come. where do we go from here, ive tried to help as much as I can, but at 28 years old Im not in a position to clear his debts for him, and even if I was, Im annoyed that he's allowed himself to get into his situation, can we get the interest frozen on his credit cards, I think they denied the letters i wrote just to increase the debt and add charges..HELP PLEASE...B

[Kafka]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Speak to Consumer Credit Counselling Service straight away. They are much quicker and more effective than CAB. They can front all of the negotiations for him

[Sapphire]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Hello Baxter, I'm sorry that your son has run into troubles, we certainly will try to help you here and if I don't know the answer I will certainly try to find out the answer for you. You really don't need to go to the CCCS unless you are convinced that you do not want to deal with this yourself.

Hi all,
My Son recently went off the rails after splitting with his girlfriend of 5 years, they were living together had a row and that was the final nail in the coffin, she moved out and he did'nt take it well, in fact he was devastated, and found his comfort getting together with his pals and partying for the last 5 months, last week he went into meltdown when he started to panic after losing his job, savings gone, and debts he cant pay,
Ive written letters for him to his credit card companies, explaining that hes no longer working and to make an agreement reduce repayments and freeze interest.
Did you send the letters recorded delivery?
2 keep making demands and said that they have not had any letter about his circumstances, and the other 2 are threatening him with allsorts and how much they will add onto his debt,
If you did send them recorded delivery then you will have signed proof that they got them. If not then I would send another letter off to them now and make sure that they are definately recorded. There is a selection of letters in our template library that you can adapt to suit your circumstances Legal Beagles.
The two that are threatening things and adding interest etc can you post up copies of what they say on this thread so that we can address this matter directly.
He also got 2 new settee's from land of leather 12 months ago which he intended at the time to pay off after the interest free period, but now he cant, the finance co said they were bringing a van to collect it and hes worried sick. Ive told him that they cant just come and take them away and not to let them in if they did come.
I am not sure about how he stands with the Land of Leather and I will ask a colleaque (Cetelco his knowledge is excellent) for his advice and get back to you on this.
where do we go from here, ive tried to help as much as I can, but at 28 years old Im not in a position to clear his debts for him, and even if I was, Im annoyed that he's allowed himself to get into his situation,
Please try not to get yourself into a state about this, we can get this sorted out.
can we get the interest frozen on his credit cards, I think they denied the letters i wrote just to increase the debt and add charges..HELP PLEASE...B

Thats why you should always send correspondence by Recorded Delivery. We can ask for the interest to be frozen although they don't always do it straight away.
In the meantime can I suggest that you sit him down and make out an Income and Expenditure Form so that you know exactly the state of his finances.
If you find that the companies are hassling on the phone you can also prepare and sent of (by Recorded Delivery) our Telephone Harrassment Letter which can also be found in the Template Library at least in a day or so, that part will be sorted out.

Ok I am away now to call Cetelco for advice on Land of Leather he may pop in and add his advice.

[Guest]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Can you elaborate on the details of the contract that your son has with Land of Leather? It would be highly irregular for any contract to allow them to recover the goods, not only that, what would they do with them, they are now used and not worth what he owes?

They cannot enter his house, no matter what they say and, even though I doubt very much they will try, he should refuse to let them if anyone does turn up.

However, clearly the sofas must be paid for and once we have more details we can advise further on what he can do.

[Baxter]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Hi yes, he got the 2 leather sofa's for £799, with an interest free period of 12 months, that 12 months ended in Jan 08 and if he did not pay them off by the 26th they then add the interest on. a company called creation finance tried to take a DD from his bank in Nov but because he had previously cancelled all DD they wrote to him teling him to set it back up, He called them from my phone and stated that the terms of contract were that he had until 26th Jan to repay in full, and they had no right until after that date to take any DDs from his bank, they said that part of his CCA was that a DD was in place but I spoke to them and told them they were wrong, which after a while they agreed, they must have saved my mobile No because they keep calling me every day nearly asking for him, Ive told them he does not live with me and refused to give them his mobile No, they told me they were within their rights to go to his home and take back their goods as hes defaulted, I had words with the guy and said they had no right of entry, unless they have a court order, which they said that wont be a problem as they were going to take him to court.
I asked if we could agree a repayment plan and the guy said no less than £25 every week and he only gets £70 so said he could'nt afford that much, so its a case of see you in court, which will further add to his debt, something like £200 for costs and solicitors fees as well as the interest. his £799 sofa's are going to cost about £1600 by the time they're finished.

The letters I sent to the CC companies were sent by recorded delivery so someone will have had to sign for them, il have a look in the morning and print off the signatures..I could kill him, they get worse as they get older..B

[Baxter]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Im totally gobsmacked, he gave me all his statements to go through to find out how many bank charges and CC charges hed had, there are'nt many but im shocked to discover that hes been gambling on an internet site, inter global? or something like that, in 1 day he did it 7 times at £102 a time, ive just sent him a text mesge, i want to kill him, i never thought for a moment he would be stupid enough to gamble and cant understand why he would give me all his statements to find out... Im just so "lost" what has my lad turned into, and give it all to me to sort out, ive gone from wanting to stop him hurting and wrapping him up, to killing him, im so mad i wont sleep tonight...Il let you all know what happens tomorrow, he has'nt answered my text, dont think he dare...B

[Guest]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Ok, it seems like you have done all the right things. As for the court costs, it should not cost £200 but it is not likely to be much less sadly.

However, if he makes an offer, he may be able to delay them filing at court and even if they do and the judge finds that the sum he offered is really all he can afford then it is possible that costs can be avoided, but we will cross that bridge when, or if we come to it.

He should make a realistic offer and send them the first payment with it. If it is only £5 per week, then so be it. At least he is making an effort to pay and is not attempting to evade his responsibility.

[Sapphire]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

You may think this a stupid question but here goes:

Are all the debts in your sons name?
Has he made any arrangements for the ex to pay towards things?
Have you sent CCA requests to all the Debts?

If I think of any more I'll post again.

[enaid]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

I am going through exactly the same thing with my son Baxter. The only difference I can see is mine lives with me I was going to take out yet another loan to sort him out, the guys on here stopped me. I have reclaimed all his charges once, in fact that's how I came to get my PC the only positive side to this situation.
So having done the deed and sorted him out not once, but twice the other time was with a loan by the way.
He has now started with CCCS although it is not all sorted yet, I will let you know how this works out for him. It may be the thing for you if you can't cope with it all. By all means let the people on here help you, but just to let you know I wish I had the heart to chuck mine out on his ear. I think it far more likely that I will end up murdering him. All the best of luck Enaid x

[WendyB]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Please don't kill him Baxter - just think of all the expense of a funeral! Please don't take that the wrong way, just trying to lighten the situation.
Anyway, as has been said, it can be sorted, and everyone will help.

With regard to the bank and credit card charges, the OFT case has put a stopper on the bank charges for the time being, so i would suggest you look at the credit card charges which are not covered by the OFT case, so should be quicker to get back. Which credit card companies are they? We can probably advise which are the easiest ones to go for first. I know you say there aren't many, but every little bit helps and they'll soon start to mount up if the balance isn't being paid, or if he's over the limit.

Is his ex responsible for any of the debts? If so are any arrangements being made for her to contribute?

Take care and keep your chin up

[scottishlass]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Hi Baxter,

Would just like to offer my support also,going through the same thing with my daughter,although in her defence her ex helped to build up the debts she is struggling to pay back,and not the kind of person we want any more contact with, but he was very clever in that everything is in her name.

We are slowly getting there,I have dealt with the priority debts first and she is paying at a rate she can afford so there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Keep your chin up it can be sorted.

relax have a cuppa and you will receive all the help and support you need to get you through

[Amethyst]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

If he returns the sofas I presume the debt would be hugely reduced or written off ?

[Amethyst]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Im totally gobsmacked, he gave me all his statements to go through to find out how many bank charges and CC charges hed had, there are'nt many but im shocked to discover that hes been gambling on an internet site, inter global? or something like that, in 1 day he did it 7 times at £102 a time, ive just sent him a text mesge, i want to kill him, i never thought for a moment he would be stupid enough to gamble and cant understand why he would give me all his statements to find out... Im just so "lost" what has my lad turned into, and give it all to me to sort out, ive gone from wanting to stop him hurting and wrapping him up, to killing him, im so mad i wont sleep tonight...Il let you all know what happens tomorrow, he has'nt answered my text, dont think he dare...B

Don't kill him but he does need to stop - the trouble with internet gambling (I've been there) is it doesn't feel like its real money, and if you lose you just have a few more goes till you win it back. Then if you win you think I'll just use what I won to win a bit more, then you lose it, so you keep going to get back to the original using more money which doesn't feel real, then your bank account is overdrawn by thousands and you kick yourself for being such an idiot.

Its a way of hiding from your money problems, but also kidding yourself you are doing it to help your finances. Its a weird one and one easy to get caught up in.

He wants help but he also wants to hide from everything till its sorted out.

[Baxter]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

If he returns the sofas I presume the debt would be hugely reduced or written off ?

I doubt that they will reduce the cost by much, they already put the interest on, then they charge for a van and any admin charges thay can get in, then I think they sell them off as seconds and bill him for the rest...B

[Baxter]

Re: Son cant keep up with his debt, WORRIED SICK

Hi all
thank you all so much for your support, he is in hiding at the moment, running away, but he'l turn up! He did'nt answer my text last night and I have'nt heard from him today, Im so upset because we have a really good relationship and he's always been very respectfull to me, This is something that I will have to sort out for him because I know if I leave it to him he wont have a clue, Ive got al his doc,s here so will request CCAs from all his credit card co,s, when added up he owes about £5000, thats including his sofa's, I could get a loan and pay them off for him and have thought about it today but im not, ive decided its for him to pay, not me, and if I did he would no doubt end up in the same situation this time next year.
All the debts are in his name only, his ex never worked and just lived off him, so easy for her to walk away, he still lives in our family home, we moved out about 5 years ago to live in the flat above my business premises, I think its better I dont hear from him for a few days, Il have calmed down a lot by then, Its like one thing after another....B Thanks all again