False accusations

[Burntclay]

Thankfully after mentioning possible HARRASMENT,the abuse had abatted somewhat
however I still have 1 or 2 other concerns
Since leaving the family home on the 1st of January I have only had my daughter company for 4 hrs on April 1st
Her mother has admitted via email s that she put barriers in place to make it difficult for me
In her own words "I needed space to sort my head out"
Every Thursday I email her offering to have my daughter and she now using the non communicado effect to validate her point
A typical narcissist's trait unfortunately
So getting access to my daughter is of great concern to me

I set up a voluntary monthly payment to support my daughter using the direct gov website to find out what I'm expected to contribute
I pay by standing order on the 6th of every month and I will continue to do so
I'm self employed and have submitted my account to the HMRC
At the moment I pay £200 per month
However given my income was 50% less this yr ending do i continue with my contribution or pay a far lower amount as calculated after my tax return was calculated

[echat11]

Thankfully after mentioning possible HARRASMENT,the abuse had abatted somewhat
however I still have 1 or 2 other concerns
Since leaving the family home on the 1st of January I have only had my daughter company for 4 hrs on April 1st
Her mother has admitted via email s that she put barriers in place to make it difficult for me
In her own words "I needed space to sort my head out"
Every Thursday I email her offering to have my daughter and she now using the non communicado effect to validate her point
A typical narcissist's trait unfortunately
So getting access to my daughter is of great concern to me

I set up a voluntary monthly payment to support my daughter using the direct gov website to find out what I'm expected to contribute
I pay by standing order on the 6th of every month and I will continue to do so
I'm self employed and have submitted my account to the HMRC
At the moment I pay £200 per month
However given my income was 50% less this yr ending do i continue with my contribution or pay a far lower amount as calculated after my tax return was calculated

This might not be possible, it might be something neither party wants, just thinking out of the box, but what about
spending time with your daughter in her presence? Maybe that will smooth the path.

Regards, monthly payment support (good stuff), the following link might help -

https://www.gov.uk/how-child-maintenance-is-worked-out

[Burntclay]

So here my dilemma
do i continue to financial support or hold back due to access to my daughter issues?

[echat11]

So here my dilemma
do i continue to financial support or hold back due to access to my daughter issues?

'Hold back', wouldn't that make things worse? It's all about building bridges.

[Burntclay]

My sentiments exactly
I'm a responsible parent and morally and lovingly I will support my daughter however I'm expected to
Do I use the new calculation as hm.gov suggest ?

[echat11]

My sentiments exactly
I'm a responsible parent and morally and lovingly I will support my daughter however I'm expected to
Do I use the new calculation as hm.gov suggest ?

Yes, if you get stuck, a quick call to CAB, if needed.

[Burntclay]

I have recalculated using the .gov website after submitting my year ending April 22 tax submission
unfortunately something has cropped up that in all honesty I've never thought of or even considered
However given the mother's somewhat erratic behaviour over the last 2 yrs , is my daughter actually mine ?
Just the thought fills me with despair

[echat11]

I have recalculated using the .gov website after submitting my year ending April 22 tax submission
unfortunately something has cropped up that in all honesty I've never thought of or even considered
However given the mother's somewhat erratic behaviour over the last 2 yrs , is my daughter actually mine ?
Just the thought fills me with despair

Only one way to find out, you know what that is, that is easily done, quite a few ways to do it, but make sure it's done in the correct way.

It's the last thing you need regards the situation.

[Burntclay]

My head is in a spin
I want to everything I can to support her,however this latest twist has really played havoc with me mentally

[Burntclay]

Naturally I want to do everything legally however I have no idea on how ?
I'm assuming that your reply is ref to some sort of DNA testing?

[echat11]

My head is in a spin
I want to everything I can to support her,however this latest twist has really played havoc with me mentally

The best thing is to switch off from it, stop thinking about it, at the moment you know nothing, other then she is your daughter. When you are mentally prepared to learn more, then you can take those steps. Also book an appointment with your Doctor if you get 'overwhelmed' by the situation.

[echat11]

Naturally I want to do everything legally however I have no idea on how ?
I'm assuming that your reply is ref to some sort of DNA testing?

Yes, there are companies that do DNA tests, it is a very straightforward process, you provide DNA, your daughter provides DNA (that's the legal bit you need to research, do you need to get the mothers permission etc), the lab does the test, then forward the results to you.

[Burntclay]

Yes, there are companies that do DNA tests, it is a very straightforward process, you provide DNA, your daughter provides DNA (that's the legal bit you need to research, do you need to get the mothers permission etc), the lab does the test, then forward the results to you.

Any links would be very much appreciated

[atticus]

I have googled it for you: https://www.google.com/search?q=comp...hrome&ie=UTF-8

[efpom]

Are you named as "father" on the child's birth certificate?