Enforcement of Contact order and Financial Compensation

[jellsbells80]

Hi wonder if anyone can help me please... my ex partner and I have two children we separated 5 years ago.

In November 2017 we had a contact order made which up until last summer was running brilliantly. he asked to take the children abroad so he could get married which I had no issue with but it was during term time and therefore I declined on the basis that they would miss two weeks schooling.

The school confirmed they would not authorise the trip and he never contacted the school or did anything about getting any further permission.

We have a stipulation on the order that states I will not unreasonaby withhold the passports. In this instance I felt that to withhold them was being reasonable. They went ahead and booked their wedding despite my clear indication that I would not agree to them coming. They booked their wedding in November 2017 and I found out about it in January 2018. They got married in July 2018.

In the meanwhile they had social services etc. become involved to say that I was emotionally harming the children - social services agreed it was a malicious act on their part and the case was closed. We have had a few "run-ins" since.

His new wife hates me and is constantly undermining my parenting - just one example being she cut my childs hair despite me asking her not to. I have used words in temper on a couple of occaisions to the effect of "if you do that again pleaes dont expect me to be nice and just give you passports willy nilly etc."....

On saturday i received paperwork from our local court to state that my ex now wants to enforce the order already in place and is seeking full compensation for the hoiday that that children were not allowed to paritcipate in (18 months ago!). How can he even do this? the school said no, I said no.

He is claiming for accommodation, flights, bridesmaid dresses and shoes, hairstyles and flowers..... I have correspondence from him and his wife last year telling me how they had had refunds on the flights to rebook at a later date. I dont have £2000 to give him I am unsure how he thinks he is entitled to it let alone going to get it from me. On occaision he has brought the children home early and late ive not said a word about it although I have diarised it all. he has canceleld weekends with them and ive been really accommodating letting him have extra visits etc. I have gone out of my way to buy him token gifts from the children for fathers day, birthdays etc. I started after the court hearing in 2017 of deciding to be the bigger person and reiterating that we would be in eachothers lives forever. He has made the last 18 months absolute hell for me.

I just want to know his chances of having an enforcement order put against me given that he too has fallen foul of our agreement and if the courts will give him any chance of his monetary claim standing?

[jaguarsuk]

He has no chance of claiming the money from you. What court is he trying to enforce the order? The Family Court?

Your defence is that the school refused authorisation for the children to take leave from school and if you had allowed him to take them you would both have been guilty of an offence under section 444 of the Education Act 1996. It was wholly reasonable to with hold the children's passports to ensure you were complying with the law.

Furthermore to mitigate his loss he should have informed you of his plans to allow you to contact the school prior to booking their trip to allow you to seek permission and that in delaying informing you by three months you can't be held liable for his loss as such.

Finally that in having received a partial refund already on the holiday he is effectively trying to claim for a loss that does not exist.

[jellsbells80]

Yes in the family court. I am more unnerved about him getting the contact order enforced and me having to do unpaid work - I can prove the order works fine - his statement provided includes emails between us that show only 50% of a conversation. I am seeing a solicitor tomorrow but I could really do without the expense before Christmas I dont even know how a judge can even look at it what a total and utter waste of everyone's time.

[jellsbells80]

Also can my solicitor ask the Court to throw it out completely? its ridiculous!

[jaguarsuk]

I’ve missed the bit about unpaid work, why would you have to do that?

Your Solicitor may be able to apply to the court to have it struck out, but family law isn’t really something I’m not on.

A general principle of law is that it’s reasonable to enrage in any act to not break the law, hence how I could addict as I did.

It it is also when money is claimed that a loss must have occurred to warrant damages.

I can understand the frustration at the cost, but you are doing the right thing consulting a professional. I have been there with my step daughters dad, although he had the good grace to wait until January at least to cost us a small fortune.

[jellsbells80]

So I saw my solicitor today who agreed I am in breach as part of the order stipulates that we share pick ups and drop offs.

Hoewver since 2018 My ex partner and his wife have been so aggressive both on my doorstep and on their own that Ive not agreed to be there at pick ups as I just feel its not in the children's best interests.

The order clearly stipulates however that my ex partneer is to collect the children on a Friday - and he NEVER does - he always sends his wife - so technically my laywer thinks that he is also in breach.

As regards the wedding fiasco he agrees there is absolutely no chance of it sticking.

I've just signed my terms of engagement and agreed to 25 hours at £250 I feel sick. This is the equivalent of 3 holidays for me and my children.

We are putting in an order for our own costs but its not likely tobe accepted apparently its quite hard in the family courts to have a order for costs put in.

[jaguarsuk]

So I saw my solicitor today who agreed I am in breach as part of the order stipulates that we share pick ups and drop offs.

Hoewver since 2018 My ex partner and his wife have been so aggressive both on my doorstep and on their own that Ive not agreed to be there at pick ups as I just feel its not in the children's best interests.

The order clearly stipulates however that my ex partneer is to collect the children on a Friday - and he NEVER does - he always sends his wife - so technically my laywer thinks that he is also in breach.

As regards the wedding fiasco he agrees there is absolutely no chance of it sticking.

I've just signed my terms of engagement and agreed to 25 hours at £250 I feel sick. This is the equivalent of 3 holidays for me and my children.

We are putting in an order for our own costs but its not likely tobe accepted apparently its quite hard in the family courts to have a order for costs put in.

I feel for you, you have already engaged the solicitor and it's a bit late now, but as hard as paying up to him would have been it might have been better to offer a reduced settlement then pay a £250 per hour solicitor for 25 hours no?

[jellsbells80]

But I haven't done anything wrong.

[jaguarsuk]

But I haven't done anything wrong.

But you are intending paying £6,000 for 25 hours at £250p/h to prove a point, surely although it sticks in the throat it's better to pay £2,000?

Sometimes it's better to pick your battles.