Terrified 42 year old female

[Xmaself]

So long story short....

I'm a 42 year old female who went into town last Saturday for my works night out, only remember having 3 drinks tops then the next thing I remember is waking up in A&E on the Sunday morning at 8.30am hooked up to a heart monitor......

Turns out I was taken to hospital by ambulance in the early hours of Sunday morning and they suspected my drink had been spiked....

Admitted to a ward for various blood tests etc

So I was discharged late on the Sunday evening with confirmation that a foreign body had been found in my blood that they believe is the evidence of a drug in my system that may have caused my heart arrhythmia.

I went back to work on the Monday as I felt physically OK and kinda wanted to know if anyone could fill in the blanks.....

Turns out that the only thing that has come to light is that a person very new to our workplace has told everyone that I bit him and he's been to hospital for a tetanus. Now I have no recollection at all for about 10 hours of that night so when I seen him I obviously apologised and explained what had happened to me which he seemed to have accepted.

I'm not at work today and I've just received a call from my line manager to tell me this person is considering going to the police to get me charged.... I'm absolutely terrified, I'm a married mother or 2 who's now facing a possible ruined Christmas....... Please help/advise

Thanks in advance....
​

[des8]

Not a very nice experience.
As you are back at work hopefully whatever you ingested has no lasting effect.
I would suggest you obtain the hospital records.

Before the police would charge you they will carry out an investigation.
This will possibly (probably) include interviewing you.

Now this person alleges you bit him, but it needs to be proved.
Were any of your other colleagues a witness to the alleged biting incident?
If not, where and when did it take place?
If your were already in a drugged state when the alleged biting took place, did this person realise it?
Did he call the ambulance?
Was the bite one of attack? or defence? or a kiss gone wrong? You don't know..does anyone?

There are so many questions to be answered it is difficult to give guidance to the outcome of the matter, but one thing I will stress is the necessity of having a solicitor accompany you when interviewed by the police.
They will need to prove assault, and you must ensure you don't convict yourself.


One of the things that needs to be proved in assault cases is "mens rea" i.e.the need to prove that the assailant had the intention of causing apprehension of violence in the victim.
As you were unwittingly under the influence of drugs there will be difficulty doing that, unless you drop yourself in it!

You have already apologised to the person involved, for something of which you have no recollection. That sort of statement is tantamount to a confession, so you need a solicitor.

Best to take your own, but if you can't afford legal representation you can request the attendance of the duty solicitor.
Don't be fooled if the police say there is no need for that, they only want to chat to find out what happened.
Insist on the presence of a solicitor... it is your right

In the meantime don't speak to your accuser, and other than discrete enquiries with your friends to find out if they know anything, do not discuss it with others, including your employer. They should not be discussing it with you anyway, as they could be accused of perverting the course of justice

I doubt you'll hear anything until after Christmas

Good luck, and try and relax.

[Xmaself]

Thank you for time in responding and your detailed reply.

The venue has viewed the footage and confirmed to my workplace that I bit him but the discussion the victim had with me was quite lighthearted and when I asked him to explain the context of the incident (it was certainly not a kiss gone wrong!) he said that we were having a laugh etc and I stuck my tongue out at him and he shoved his pinkie in my face and I bit it!? He certainly never mentioned getting me charged at that point (Tuesday morning) and was totally fine with me for the rest of the working day.

My line manager has spoken to everyone who was at the venue at the time and nobody seen anything!? Even the other person who got a taxi home with the victim says he never mentioned anything about the bite or sore finger all the way back in the taxi.

I will definitely be getting in contact with a solicitor though, thanks for the advice.

[des8]

Sounds more like an accident to me.
Inebriated people playing silly buggers, and if he sticks a finger in your face and it gets bitten tough luck!
Sticking finger in your face... counter charge with accusation of assault
Must have been very close if it entered your mouth, so self defence.

If he has any sense he won't make the accusation.... think of how your workmates will view him!

[Xmaself]

He's only worked in our company for 2 weeks but so far none of the other guys have really taken to him, I work in a different department so don't have much direct contact with him.

The person who was standing right next to us both at the time of the incident said that she remembers nothing regarding a bite or the aftermath of an incident taking place...

I have at least an 8 hour period of just nothing, no memories or flashbacks of any kind.

I'm going to take advice tomorrow from a solicitor and try to prepare for any sort of possible police visit.

Thanks again, I really appreciate your time.

Don't think I'll be sleeping tonight...

[des8]

Well I'm off to bed now, and you should as well...think about your children.
It seems he has no witnesses in a crowded venue.. that will sound very odd to the police if he ever reports the alleged incident.
Remember this is only alleged, it is not a proven fact that you bit him.
If he has an injury, was it from you or his dog or his partner?
There is no need to incur solicitors fees until you hear from the police (if ever)


Next bits are a bit tongue in cheek:

Regarding the Tetanus jab... if his tetanus was not up to date this jab if it was vaccine won't be much use to him but will help against future attacks
so he should thank you for causing his tetanus immunity to be brought up to date! !!!
So you need proof he had a tetanus injection of immunoglobulin because of this injury.

Guidance from NHS Wales on managing human bites (and I assume you English react the same way!)
"The risk of tetanus from a human bite is very low and in most circumstances Tetanus Immunoglobulin (TIG) is not required. Tetanus vaccine is not considered adequate for treating a tetanus-prone wound since tetanus vaccine given at the time of a tetanus-prone injury may not boost immunity early enough to give additional protection within the incubation period of tetanus. However, giving a dose of vaccine at the time of injury provides the opportunity to ensure that the individual is protected against future exposure, if they are not already fully vaccinated"

[Xmaself]

So I've just had a phone call from a work colleague who has been told to 'advise' me that this guy has called in sick for a 5th day in a row due to stress of his situation and his sore pinkie but wanted HR'S contact details as he wants to raise a grievance against me. He is still talking about bringing assault charges.*

I've now got a lawyer who has advised me to say nothing at work to anyone due to my lawyer's advice and if the police show at my door to say nothing until I've spoken to him.

[des8]

TBH he sounds like a proper bully and is all mouth and no trousers!
Loose talk about assault charges and raising a grievance when there seems to be little evidence of an assault actually having happened seem more aimed at frightening you than actually doing anything.
The police will certainly wonder why the delay in reporting an assault.

glad to see you have a solicitor, and he agrees you say nothing to plod without his ok

Now go and have a good Christmas

[Xmaself]

Thanks for your reply, I really appreciate it.* I'm really struggling to sleep or eat at the moment but now the kids are off school, I'm going to go and try and enjoy my time with them and deal with things when they happen.*

Just wondering if I should also consider consulting an employment lawyer as well?*

[ULA]

Hi, I often post on the employment section of this forum, given what you have said there is no need to consult an employment lawyer. No grievance has been raised so there is nothing for you to do about this at the moment.

Just have a lovely time with your children over Christmas.

[Xmaself]

Hi everyone,*
Tried to have as normal a Christmas as possible for the kids but I'm still stressed/anxious about what I'm going back to. This guy who alleges I bit him is still off sick, no sign of police yet and I'm not sure what he's doing about raising a grievance against me. I've not been sleeping or eating properly and as a result ended up at my Dr who has signed me off for 2 weeks... But I feel like (in moments of strength) that I should just go in and face what I have coming and at other times I just want to hide in a hole!!!! I really love my job, pays well, fits well with the kids and childcare and we really can't afford for me to lose it.... But just don't know what to do!!!! Any help or advice greatly appreciated.*

[ULA]

Sorry to hear you have been signed off sick.

On the police side of things given what Des8 said in post #8 about the delay in making a report and that it is now nearly 3 weeks after the event, if he has not yet filed a complaint, I would suggest even if he did the police would really wonder why the delay in him doing so. However this is not my area of expertise so maybe wait for des8 to respond.

On the grievance itself these should be raised as soon as possible after the issue happens, even if he is off sick it would not stop him from actually writing in with his grievance, particularly if it is related to the reason he is off. So again I would wonder if he is actually going to raise one at all.*

In regard to your employer, have you notified then you have been signed off sick which i presume is due to stress and anxiety?

Is work aware that you were hospitalised and discharged with evidence of drugs in your system most likely due to your drink being spiked on the Sat evening?

Have you thought about speaking to your manager or HR? This would give you the opportunity to explain that the stress and anxiety for which you are signed off is purely down to the fact this person has claimed they will be filing a police report and/or raising a grievance, for an incident you cannot remember due to your drink being spiked and your subsequent hospitalisation as a result.*

Just some thoughts that may help.

*

[Xmaself]

I have the sick line here with me (issued on the 31st) but I'm too scared to hand it in.... My line manager is a bit power hungry and I don't trust her (she was playing bad cop in private and good cop when others were around when I last seen her on the 17th!) my work is fully aware that I was hospitalised but because the discharge letter says "suspected drink spiking" my line manager said (bad cop in private) I had to suck up the fact that I probably just drank too much and I need to take responsibility for my behaviour! Thanks for your thoughts and tips ULA I really appreciate it. Xmaself

[ULA]

I hope that you have at least phoned in sick if you have been due to be in work on any of the recent non-bank holiday days - just need to make sure you follow any company procedures on sickness absence.

Do you have an HR department as they may be better to speak with?*

[Xmaself]

I'm not due back to work until Sunday 5th of January and I did try to call our HR Department today but nobody was in!?! Still feel very conflicted, my Dr clearly see's how this is affecting me and recommends I stay off but the anxiety of what will ultimately come whether I return to work on the 5th or 13th is killing me. Thanks*