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Guide to darkest Essex

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  • Guide to darkest Essex

    An invaluable guide for those of you that venture to darkest Essex

    alma chizzit - A request to find the cost of an item

    amant - Quantity; sum total ('Thez a yuge amant of mud in Saffend')

    assband - Unable to leave the house because of illness, disability etc

    awss - A four legged animal, on which money is won, or more likely lost ('That awss ya tipped cost me a fiver t'day')

    branna - More brown than on a previous occasion ('Ere, Trace, ya look branna today, ave you been on sunbed?')

    cort a panda - A rather large hamburger

    Dan in the maff - Unhappy ('Wossmatta, Trace, ya look a bit Dan in the maff')

    eye-eels - Women's shoes

    Furrock - The location of Lakeside Shopping Centre

    garrij - A building where a car is kept or repaired(Trace: 'Oi, Darren, I fink the motah needs at go in the garrij cos it aint working proper')

    Ibeefa - Balaeric holiday island

    lafarjik - Lacking in energy ('I feel all lafarjik')

    OI OI! - Traditional greeting. Often heard from the doorway of pubs or during banging dance tunes at clubs

    paipa - The Sun, The Mirror or The Sport

    reband - The period of recovery and emotional turmoil after rejection by a lover ('I couldn't elp it, I wuz on the reband from Craig')

    Saffend - Essex coastal resort boasting the longest pleasure pier in the world. The place where the characters from TV's, popular soap opera, Eastenders go on holiday

    tan - The city of London, the big smoke

    webbats - Querying the location something or someone is. ('Webbats is me dole card Trace? I've gotta sign on in arf hour')

    wonnid - Desired, needed. 2. Wanted by the police

    zaggerate - To suggest that something is bigger or better than it actually is. ('I told ya a fazzand times already')

  • #2
    Re: Guide to darkest Essex

    You are in soooooooooo much trouble Paul :kiss: compared to you lot up north we are positively well spoken.

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