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If many of the following apply to you, then you're probably from Devon...
... you've bought stationery at Trago Mills
... you think Exeter's a big city
... you can tell sheep from goats
... and straw from hay (obviously!)*
... you once went to Totnes for the day and returned three weeks later, very happy, but with no idea why
... you think London's 'up north'
... you know someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows Joss Stone
... the smell of cow **** makes you feel at home
... everywhere else in the UK feels cold
... you have a friend who lives on a farm
... you live on a farm
... you know and love Massey Ferguson*
... you learnt to drive in a field or on a beach
... you live in a cottage
... your home has a thatched roof
... you've been stuck behind a stupid tourist on a country lane
... you saw the total eclipse in '99
... your local newspaper's lead story is 'cow falls off bridge'
... you turned to drink, drugs or heavy metal at an early age
... you know the best sledging to be had is at Haytor
... your friends say you sound like a farmer
... you have nothing to do after 5:30pm
... you think pink wellies are a fashion statement
... you know 'Cornish' pasties are actually from Devon
... you've boiled / frozen / eroded during Ten Tors
... you know how to walk over a cattle grid
... you want to know who came up with 'take moor care'
... you know all about 'letterboxing' (but wish you didn't)
... you watch 'Spotlight' (and know Teresa Driscoll, Justin Leigh, Russel Labey, Craig Rich and the gang )
... you've been pony trekking
... 'short and choppy on the North coast' makes total sense to you
... you think nothing of grass growing in the middle of the road
... your town is 'the gem of south Devon' or 'the English Riviera' despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary*
... you think a barn dance is a wild night out
... until you went on holiday, the tallest building you had ever seen was Debenhams in Exeter
... you've reversed for 3 miles when you met a stubborn tourist on a country lane*
... it takes you 4 times longer to drive anywhere between May and September*
... you carry an umbrella everywhere even when it's 35 degrees (because it WILL start to hail randomly)*
... you're a closet fan of The Wurzels
... your second cousin is also your sister's stepmother
... your neighbours' average age is 76*
... your best friend goes joyriding in tractors*
... your parents regularly thanked God for Crealy Country Park and Woodlands*
... your teachers regularly thanked God for Paignton Zoo, Buckfast Abbey, Morwellham Quay and the legendary House of Marbles*
... you can't stand the grockles, despite living off their money*
... you thought it was normal for more than 50% of your high street's shops to be operated by charities*
... everyone you meet has been on holiday to your home town - no wonder it's so busy in summer*
... you spent your entire childhood wanting to leave the place, yet now that you have, you cry yourself to sleep then dream of rolling green hills and long, sandy beaches*
... you used to look through your physical geography textbook because you knew half of the places in there
... you know that 'the Launa man can'*
... your most thrilling childhood experience was the Death slide at Woodlands / Crealy / The Devon Shire Horse Centre*
... before Freeview, you didn't believe the rumours about a '5th television channel'*
... you don't yet have Freeview - what 5th channel?
... you found out about Plymouth Hoe / Westward Ho! before you realised the name could be entertaining*
... your local shop sells clotted cream fudge and bucket/spade packs, but not newspapers
... your local publican (who has sideburns and red face) is a member of CAMRA, and thinks a 'gastropub' is a medical complication (he serves peanuts & crisps)
... you don't understand why a cinema would need more than two screens*
... someone once ran past you clutching a burning barrel of tar*
... your birthday was read out by a rabbit called Honeybun, Gus Honeybun*
... you use the 'fast and close' method for passing cars on country lanes - passing places are for grockles!*
... you can tell animals apart by their crap*
... you have had to walk home with only one welly on, after the other one was sucked into a bog / thick mud*
... you thought Hot Fuzz was a documentary*
... you think that running into the sea on New Year's or Christmas Day is brave, not foolish*
... you always thought of Gandy Street as a rich and varied shopping experience*
... your car is considered a Site of Special Scientific Interest due to its unique collection of sand, mud, twigs and general wildlife from various Devonshire walks*
... you recognise a fellow Devonian across a crowded room when you hear the phrase "where you to"*
... you know that palm trees are from Torquay, not the Carribean*
... you know that a BMW X5 / Porsche Cayenne / Hummer H3 wouldn't get past a big puddle - proper farmers drive Landrovers!*
... as a kid, your Mum was always complaining about the grass stains on your trousers, thanks to you sliding down hills for fun on a sledge / compost bag / your *****
... after a wet walk in the fields you return home 2 inches higher because of the Devon mud on your boots
... you understand that 'alright my handsome' is an entirely heterosexual greeting between men*
... your drive to work involves following a quad bike, a herd of cows and a border collie*
... your drive to work is on a quad bike, pursuing a herd of cows with a border collie running alongside*
... the tarmac playground at your school was only used when the school fields were muddy*
... you've bought stationery at Trago Mills
... you think Exeter's a big city
... you can tell sheep from goats
... and straw from hay (obviously!)*
... you once went to Totnes for the day and returned three weeks later, very happy, but with no idea why
... you think London's 'up north'
... you know someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows Joss Stone
... the smell of cow **** makes you feel at home
... everywhere else in the UK feels cold
... you have a friend who lives on a farm
... you live on a farm
... you know and love Massey Ferguson*
... you learnt to drive in a field or on a beach
... you live in a cottage
... your home has a thatched roof
... you've been stuck behind a stupid tourist on a country lane
... you saw the total eclipse in '99
... your local newspaper's lead story is 'cow falls off bridge'
... you turned to drink, drugs or heavy metal at an early age
... you know the best sledging to be had is at Haytor
... your friends say you sound like a farmer
... you have nothing to do after 5:30pm
... you think pink wellies are a fashion statement
... you know 'Cornish' pasties are actually from Devon
... you've boiled / frozen / eroded during Ten Tors
... you know how to walk over a cattle grid
... you want to know who came up with 'take moor care'
... you know all about 'letterboxing' (but wish you didn't)
... you watch 'Spotlight' (and know Teresa Driscoll, Justin Leigh, Russel Labey, Craig Rich and the gang )
... you've been pony trekking
... 'short and choppy on the North coast' makes total sense to you
... you think nothing of grass growing in the middle of the road
... your town is 'the gem of south Devon' or 'the English Riviera' despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary*
... you think a barn dance is a wild night out
... until you went on holiday, the tallest building you had ever seen was Debenhams in Exeter
... you've reversed for 3 miles when you met a stubborn tourist on a country lane*
... it takes you 4 times longer to drive anywhere between May and September*
... you carry an umbrella everywhere even when it's 35 degrees (because it WILL start to hail randomly)*
... you're a closet fan of The Wurzels
... your second cousin is also your sister's stepmother
... your neighbours' average age is 76*
... your best friend goes joyriding in tractors*
... your parents regularly thanked God for Crealy Country Park and Woodlands*
... your teachers regularly thanked God for Paignton Zoo, Buckfast Abbey, Morwellham Quay and the legendary House of Marbles*
... you can't stand the grockles, despite living off their money*
... you thought it was normal for more than 50% of your high street's shops to be operated by charities*
... everyone you meet has been on holiday to your home town - no wonder it's so busy in summer*
... you spent your entire childhood wanting to leave the place, yet now that you have, you cry yourself to sleep then dream of rolling green hills and long, sandy beaches*
... you used to look through your physical geography textbook because you knew half of the places in there
... you know that 'the Launa man can'*
... your most thrilling childhood experience was the Death slide at Woodlands / Crealy / The Devon Shire Horse Centre*
... before Freeview, you didn't believe the rumours about a '5th television channel'*
... you don't yet have Freeview - what 5th channel?
... you found out about Plymouth Hoe / Westward Ho! before you realised the name could be entertaining*
... your local shop sells clotted cream fudge and bucket/spade packs, but not newspapers
... your local publican (who has sideburns and red face) is a member of CAMRA, and thinks a 'gastropub' is a medical complication (he serves peanuts & crisps)
... you don't understand why a cinema would need more than two screens*
... someone once ran past you clutching a burning barrel of tar*
... your birthday was read out by a rabbit called Honeybun, Gus Honeybun*
... you use the 'fast and close' method for passing cars on country lanes - passing places are for grockles!*
... you can tell animals apart by their crap*
... you have had to walk home with only one welly on, after the other one was sucked into a bog / thick mud*
... you thought Hot Fuzz was a documentary*
... you think that running into the sea on New Year's or Christmas Day is brave, not foolish*
... you always thought of Gandy Street as a rich and varied shopping experience*
... your car is considered a Site of Special Scientific Interest due to its unique collection of sand, mud, twigs and general wildlife from various Devonshire walks*
... you recognise a fellow Devonian across a crowded room when you hear the phrase "where you to"*
... you know that palm trees are from Torquay, not the Carribean*
... you know that a BMW X5 / Porsche Cayenne / Hummer H3 wouldn't get past a big puddle - proper farmers drive Landrovers!*
... as a kid, your Mum was always complaining about the grass stains on your trousers, thanks to you sliding down hills for fun on a sledge / compost bag / your *****
... after a wet walk in the fields you return home 2 inches higher because of the Devon mud on your boots
... you understand that 'alright my handsome' is an entirely heterosexual greeting between men*
... your drive to work involves following a quad bike, a herd of cows and a border collie*
... your drive to work is on a quad bike, pursuing a herd of cows with a border collie running alongside*
... the tarmac playground at your school was only used when the school fields were muddy*
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