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Will, What if person inherits inst fit to look after themselves or home

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  • #16
    So, let me get this right. Your brother has learning difficulties and has always lived with your parents. You don’t want this brother to get the house and money when your Dad passes away. You also don’t want your Dad’s money to be eaten up by paying approx £1,000 a week in care home fees.

    Sounds to me like your Dad is leaving everything to his son with learning difficulties as he knows he will be unable to earn money for himself and he wants to provide for him for the rest of his life. I can understand that. Obviously you can’t.

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    • #17
      Hmm.... I read the situation that OP was concerned that his brother being incapable of looking after himself, would possibly squander his inheritance and quickly lose all benefit.
      I believe OP was looking for ways in which to protect the inheritance for the long term benefit of his brother.

      Comment


      • #18
        I thought the same as DES8...

        Comment


        • #19
          Interesting how we all interpret things differently. I have worked with people with learning difficulties maybe that’s why I read it as I did. Also I kept an eye on someone with LD who used to live near us. On the death of his well off father the family were supposed to have supported him and made sure he had everything he needed. His father made that clear in his will. Instead they provided him with a tiny house hundreds of miles from where they lived, they never visited him and he was completely left to his own devices. It was only down to the kindness of villagers who took him under their wings that he just about managed. Obviously not saying that is the case here though.

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          • #20
            That sounds very sad. Parents were just looking out for younger son I guess. Bet they never thought what would happen when something bad happens [lost mum already] may lose dad, or may not come out of home for some time. The home costs will eat into the hard earned savings of mum and dad. The assesment on home and younger may not go well. It will be sad if money goes and the home, then what happens. He never worked since 16, so how on earth did parents think he would manage family home.

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            • #21
              Ok. Taking 1 step at a time. Traveling to see brother and bungalow and Hope to see Father in home next week. At 83, frail after weeks in hospital due to stroke. Home has said that he isnt able to understand much in the way of talking, no way can he sort household issues, financial issues. very hazy and confused.
              1] Best option to sort dads finances, especial DWP which is to be closed shortly at PO, he hasnt even sent form back to them from March last year that they closing PO payment, hasnt collected DWP for nearly 9 weeks. Household bills need sorting. Still waiting for community social worker to be allocated and assesment competed.
              HOw do or what do I do to act on dads behalf, and need to do very quickly only about 4 weeks left in home then it will have to be paid for.
              2] It has been confirmed within the last few days, that younger brother with help from family member, hasnt been cleaning and sorting the home, it is very dirty, his bedroom and dads ,bedding fil
              thy mould damp. He has litterally spent the last 8 weeks lying on the phone about it. The dog is messing the furniture etc. Walls have damp and mould, bathroom is rotten on floor areas, not clean [needs a new one, especially if dad ever comes home] All I get from him on phone is " I cant cope, its to much.. I worry, " he did about half an hour dusting [prompted by aunt] and said it was to much. Doesnt bath or look after himself properly. Certainly doesnt understand the seriousness of situation with dad.
              3] How do I sort out what repairs major cleaning etc which I assume dad will pay for, if so how to get the bank to pay for it all. I feel this will have to be done before they even consider letting dad go home.
              4] How and what do I do about brother. clearly cant cope on own. Option? Have the dog put into rescue centre and a urgent visit from social worker to asses or place him somewhere.

              The whole thing is very distressfull and worrying. Im sorry for my father, he needs to be at home, cared for, but in a clean and safe one.
              any suggestions how to handle this please.

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              • #22
                Hy, just spent the last few hrs trying to understand, POA or Deputy? Its to late for dad to say, ok you look after things? he wont, doesnt understand, couldnt think or say about it?
                Q - Is it to late for POA, he couldnt agree? how would I apply?
                Q - If it is to late, is the next action a Deputy?

                not sure what the best thing is. Or will the social worker take over all this and we dont get a say?

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                • #23
                  well in relation to last point? It looks like I cant obtain a POA. Possibly Deputy, but looking at the costs its hundreds and hundreds of pounds, we simply can not afford that option. Looks like the social workers for dad will be taking over and the care home home will take the money? Im now at my wits end and feel like giving up, I no longer feel I have the strength to fight on? it looks like its out my hands now, if anyone can get back to me before Next Thursday Id appreciate it

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                  • #24
                    As your father no longer has capacity he cannot give you PoA, and you would need to apply for deputyship.
                    Whether or not that is the best way forward (I have the impression you don't live nearby) I cannot comment.

                    I think you need to have some in depth conversations with social services for both your brother and father.
                    Some councils have extremely good Social Services departments and social workers, others unfortunately not so good.
                    Last edited by des8; 25th April 2021, 10:00:AM.

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                    • #25
                      Its so sad, Yes Im far away, over 4 hr drive each way up north. Its frustrating to know that as the oldest son, I cant do anything to protect his money or home. They wont allow dad back there, the way it is. Social will take over his pension, bills, etc and I wont be able to do anything. Im travelling next Thursday to see him 30 min appointment, but at least Ill get chance to see him if anything should happen. Id be more sorry not seing him.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        NEED a URGENT HELP ON THIS
                        Not sure if i need a seperate thread, but it is all connected to the above in a way. I need a legal route or plan asap, who to contact or what to do

                        Hy. Update, Finally got SW contact person. Phoned this evening. Dads 6 weeks in Care home up on 21st May. Ive agreed a video team meeting thing! 17 May 2pm. I tried to express my concers. Not really listening, she just says Ifs, Buts? When done assesment, health and financial, then may well keep him in home. You will be looking at at least 1000.00 a week. that will eat into dads savings. I tried to explain, that someone needs to come and look at bungalow and asses brother as well. I going up for a few days, to try and see what things are like and visit dad at weekend. If I dont get dad to understand and agree to sign POA, then its all down the pan. She just said you need to get Lawyer??? i explained forget about deputyship it costs hundreds and hundreds we can not afford.

                        What is point of you saying, IF he can go home witha care package, when there is repairs etc to be done now, well months years ago. THis will cost money, the home costs will eat into the money that should be used to do the repairs, to get dad home.

                        I understand that £21,200 + you fully pay. Down to £14,000+ to £21,200 then maybe part pay, Under £14,000+ then social service fully pay.

                        Now how does it work, when there is a home/property with a dependant son living in it? he cant look after himself never mind dads home and the bills.

                        So you use all dads savings till nothing left, how on earth are reapirs etc going to get done? they wont?

                        I fear that it may well be they will keep dad in home use all his money and family home lost? they will have to house younger son.




                        I reallly do need some legal help on this please or what I can do. especially before Sat.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Difficult decisions to be made.

                          If your father is assessed to be unfit to be discharged into the community, regardless of the financial situation that is what will happen.
                          His capital will then be assessed.

                          As a family member is living in the house it should be possible to arrange a deferred payment agreement (DPA) so care costs can be delayed until after the property is sold. The local authority put a charge on the property so that once it is sold, they are paid to the amount owed to them. The local authority obtain a valuation of the property before the agreement is finalised.

                          If your brother is assessed to be unable to look after himself the local authority would need to decide what level of help he needs

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            OK, but what happens if his son, who has been living with them/him for last 40+ years lives in the home? can they still force sale.
                            If its only a short time, and maybe with care support dad can go back home, again its the costs, If I cant get dad to understand/sign POA on saturday, how do we get the money to pay the home fees, also council tax, utilities.
                            I guess I will have to wait till the Teams meeting on 17th, but not much time till 21st may.
                            .I guess the will intentions, will be down the pan?
                            It is causing a great strain and stress on us at moment, especially me.
                            Plan - [unless i drown myself with a bottle of lemonade] travel thursday as planned, see the state of bungalow, try to get local builders for estimates. See dad at weekend. See if he can agrrea/sign POA. See if local Age UK can offere any help.
                            Wait till 17th, see what outcome is? review plans.
                            Ill assume that reapirs/costs, which will be needed if dad allowed to go home with care package wouldnt be agreed, as care home costs will want there money first?
                            The SW I spoke to wasnt really listening or understanding my concerns.

                            Not sure how to handle or manage this situation now? even less so if POA not gained. If that is how they feel, let them take all his blinkin money, take the bungalow, [they will have to sort brother issue and his dog] and Ill wash my hands off the lot of them? I will feel guilty and ashamed for my dad but Im in 60s now and the stress is going to be to much, i may not make retirement age myself at this rate.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              No, while your brother is living there, it is most unlikely they will force a sale.
                              They will value the property and put a charge on it so eventually at sometime in the future when it is sold they will get paid.
                              Hence a deferred payment agreement

                              Your father is being cared for, and should not be discharged into unsafe conditions, so I would not be too concerned about his care (in spite of the horror stories one sometimes hears)
                              From your account tho' I would be more concerned about your brother and his future care

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                thank you des8 will keep you posted on what happens. I did ask for the SW to come asses bungalow and speak to brother, while I was there in the next week or so. Answer was, not at all. was dad SW not brothers.

                                Comment

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