A "Care" Package only causes pain, misery, illness and stands to end my Mums life

[PaperClips]

Imagine a large red hot frying pan pressed into someones back leaving them red raw and skin coming off. This is the latest Caring gift we have from this care package among the many.

My Mum took a turn for the worst and is now bed bound with late stage Alzheimer's. I've got a Care Package that I don't really want, and am told Carers must come in to check on Mum. "They know what to look for". So they have said she will get bed sores, and this bad back has got worse and worse while the Carers have seen this and said nothing in the way of it needing the GP till way too late. If they hadn't been coming and made me think the growing redness must be a normal part of being bedridden, I would have acted way sooner for intervention. Now I'm fraught with fear as a GP said if we don't get this handled Mum may need to go into a Nursing Home. She needs so much care that will be the end of her.

Plus to this I am still Shielding with Mum since March 2020. Nobody visits apart form District Nurses, Carers and GP's. The Covid situation and Mum's health is such she stands a very high chance of dying from it, if she catches it ( based on ONS Top Ten Killing C19 Co-Morbidities). Where in the World is it a good idea to subject someone to the very real threat of death (Covid) to check they are OK while actually not even checking they are OK and letting them get very ill instead? Totally sick of it from the start over one year ago.

So sorry for long background...but what is my Legal Right to stop or ideally pause this Care Package? As I see it it has only caused misery for me and Mum. And will likely continue to do so till it kills her.

[EnglandPi]

Who put the care package in place? You need to make them aware your concerns and see what can be done.

[dslippy]

I suspect that you have no proper place in the conversation.
To change that your mum needs to create an enduring power of attorney appointing you to act on matters of care. That of course depends in turn on her capacity to make such a deed.
How and when that comes into effect may depend upon other things, but that would be your point of entry at law.
If she has lost capacity, then you seek appointment as a guardian at the Court of Protection (heaven help you).

[PaperClips]

Who put the care package in place? You need to make them aware your concerns and see what can be done.

Continuing Healthcare Matron(s).

[PaperClips]

I suspect that you have no proper place in the conversation.
To change that your mum needs to create an enduring power of attorney appointing you to act on matters of care. That of course depends in turn on her capacity to make such a deed.
How and when that comes into effect may depend upon other things, but that would be your point of entry at law.
If she has lost capacity, then you seek appointment as a guardian at the Court of Protection (heaven help you).

My Mum cannot speak now. She tries, but it's unintelligible. She did not create any Power Of Attorney. There is a Next Of Kin but that person encouraged me to let Mum die based on a notion of what Mum 'might be like' - yes because they had no idea what she was like but, thought she should die anyhow. Nice. She has said "Just don't let the Carers in".

I'm still shielding to protect Mum so I cannot really go to Court if that is what you mean? What is the 'heaven help you' about? Long winded? Difficult? Expensive?

[dslippy]

Capacity is the mental capacity to make a decision not the capacity to express herself.
Are not social services involved?
The law is that she makes her own decisions until there is some lawful authority granted to someone else to make those decisions.
If she loses capacity to make decisions but no lawful authority exists, then nobody can make decisions.

The Court of Protection can appoint a guardian. You can apply to be appointed, or social services will sometimes apply.
The CoP is notoriously slow and inefficient. They try, but do not have half the resources they need.

A guardian can make the decisions in her place, but that is only the first step to getting done the things you identify as being necessary

Best of luck.

[PaperClips]

Capacity is the mental capacity to make a decision not the capacity to express herself.
Are not social services involved?
The law is that she makes her own decisions until there is some lawful authority granted to someone else to make those decisions.
If she loses capacity to make decisions but no lawful authority exists, then nobody can make decisions.

The Court of Protection can appoint a guardian. You can apply to be appointed, or social services will sometimes apply.
The CoP is notoriously slow and inefficient. They try, but do not have half the resources they need.

A guardian can make the decisions in her place, but that is only the first step to getting done the things you identify as being necessary

Best of luck.

Thanks. Can I ask one more? "You can apply to be appointed, or social services will sometimes apply" . Do you mean Social Services can apply on my behalf or they apply to be her Guardian themselves? Gulp! They have been in the background but nobody has told me this.

[dslippy]

Involve them. Local authorities will differ.
They would not apply 'on your behalf' - either you or they apply.

[DE DOGS]

I have some experience of Social Services, Most are caring and compassionate, but some are to be blunt just there for the payday. Never trust anybody to make decisions, trust your own instinct and act on it your Mum is precious, it is too late to think I should have done more.

[PaperClips]

I have some experience of Social Services, Most are caring and compassionate, but some are to be blunt just there for the payday. Never trust anybody to make decisions, trust your own instinct and act on it your Mum is precious, it is too late to think I should have done more.

I didn't chose this and in fact asked not to have carers come, but it was forced. And it's my instinct too but I feel steam-rollered by the whole system and everyone in it.

Thinking aloud if nobody can make a decision without Guardianship maybe they (Social Services) have it already.

[cattermole]

Hi, sorry to hear about your Mum

Im a Carer for my 94yo Mum who's just been diagnosed with Dementia & Alzheimers, after having a heart attack in March and then acquiring Covid in hospital. I can empathise. Mum left hospital without a "Care Package" in place because they assumed I would be attending to ALL her care needs going forward.
I am so stressed out myself, having chronic clinical depression since 1997 and Ive recently been officially disgnosed with Autism.
I have previously worked as a Snr Carer Assistant with the elderly.

Thsts my background.

Bed sores are entirely preventable and are classed as Elderly Abuse...no ifs no buts.

If the Carers are shirking their responsibilities report them. The Care Quality Commission may be a handy starting point, your GP and/or threaten to raise a Safeguarding Alert with Social Services.

In the first instance, maintaining the integrity of your Mums skin is paramount. An easy solution such as laying your Mum on her side and putting pillows behind her, then turning her the other way every hour or so. Then of course there are pressure mattresses available. The GP or Dustruc Nurse needs to step up!!

[PaperClips]

Hi, sorry to hear about your Mum

Im a Carer for my 94yo Mum who's just been diagnosed with Dementia & Alzheimers, after having a heart attack in March and then acquiring Covid in hospital. I can empathise. Mum left hospital without a "Care Package" in place because they assumed I would be attending to ALL her care needs going forward.
I am so stressed out myself, having chronic clinical depression since 1997 and Ive recently been officially disgnosed with Autism.
I have previously worked as a Snr Carer Assistant with the elderly.

Thsts my background.

Bed sores are entirely preventable and are classed as Elderly Abuse...no ifs no buts.

If the Carers are shirking their responsibilities report them. The Care Quality Commission may be a handy starting point, your GP and/or threaten to raise a Safeguarding Alert with Social Services.

In the first instance, maintaining the integrity of your Mums skin is paramount. An easy solution such as laying your Mum on her side and putting pillows behind her, then turning her the other way every hour or so. Then of course there are pressure mattresses available. The GP or Dustruc Nurse needs to step up!!

The District Nurses have raised a Safeguarding Alert with Social Services about me!!! I got a phone call about me 'buying creams from the internet and using them on my Mum'..this from nobody really knowing what was wrong with her skin/back and them blaming me eventhough I ONLY ever put the prescribed creams on her back in the manner instructed. Now they think it could be a reaction to her pads but won't stop the Safeguard.

Today Social Services called. They wanted to speak to my Mum - who can't speak - who is 85 yrs (Hi covid risk) in the running for 5 of the top ten comorbidities that kill you with covid (ONS data) - who if she got covid would go untreated because she couldn't relay most symptoms (ONS data) and want to come in WITHOUT MASKS, ASK ME TO TAKE MASK OFF, TELL ME THEY HAVEN'T GOT COVID (40% are asymptomatic and 20% -ve LFT are false -ves).

in other words QUITE HAPPY TO kILL MY MUM TO SPEAK TO HER WHEN SHE CAN'T EVEN SPEAK!!!

[PaperClips]

Sorry very upset and don't know where to turn to!!!! Exactly as I feared. Even though the D Nurses had reduced their visits down to one phone call a month, my GP had said i'm "Doing a good job" and I nursed her back from Notice of Intent from April last year (not this year). I do a great job. I dropped the ball trusting the Carers! Nurses asked me to turn her every 2 hours but this Social Worker says one person CANNOT TURN SOMEBODY! Mum is like 40 Kg. The last person to turn her was a D. Nurse who also turned her by herself!! I'm dealing with IDIOTS who just have some view that is not best for Mum. More carers = Covid. It is 1 in 17 people in England. BA5 is causing more reinfections regardless of immunity and is infecting deeper into the lungs too than previous Omicrons. IOW it is not going away.

Who the hell is going to represent me and Mum for the REAL COVID risk to Mum against these buffoons who think I need two people more regularly?

I was feeding Mum when they called. I drop her PJ top down and put wipes on her chest (not boobs chest) to catch the spillage, and easy to wipe her skin and tuck her back in later. I was so upset with them at the door and no masks I didn't tuck Mum back in so her PJ top was down her arm (boobs covered). Social worker sees Mum like this and proclaims "she Isn't dressed!!". It was like everything they did / said was "anti-understanding".

They didn't even say exactly what they were looking into because when I asked if it is about the creams they didn't say.

[PaperClips]

Oh I remembered something I wanted to post here, of a Legal slant. Mum never gave Power of Attorney but did say she never wanted to go into a Nursing Home. If the family could represent this wish in the manner she never wanted strangers dealing with her toileting, feeding? Could this be used as her consent or non consent?

[dslippy]

No. There are ways of doing that (Lasting Power of Attorney for care), but if you do not use them, there is little you can do.