Hello
I'm wondering if anyone here might be able to give me some advice about my current situation. I separated from my now ex husband in April last year. He moved out and I stayed in the family home with our children. At the time things were as amicable as they could have been - I lent him some money to pay for his new accommodation for a couple of months, he saw the kids regularly and he signed the divorce papers. I had set up the paperwork for a clean break order, which he had agreed to verbally, but when it came to getting this signed and witnessed he just didn't do it. I gave him the ultimatum of Christmas or I would start court proceedings to get this sorted out. I don't want anything from him - just for us to be financially separate. There is very little equity in the house and he stood to get less than £5000 once everything was split 50/50. I have been paying for the house on my own since before he went (Feb 2018) and had a mortgage offer on my own so I can afford to take on the property and pay him off.
Anyway, the situation has significantly deteriorated since this time last year. His mental health deteriorated badly and he stopped contacting me and the kids in October last year. He then lost his job, his room and his driving license in the space of a few weeks in May 2019 just as this all went to court and he spent some time in a psychiatric hospital where he was diagnosed with a personality disorder and alcohol dependency. In May the judge ordered that he complete his financial statement, which didn't happen, and we went to court again in July. The judge refused to rule and said that we had not tried hard enough to ensure that my ex husband has seen the paperwork. I have paid someone to attempt to find him but so far he hasn't come up with anything. The most annoying thing is that my ex is on Facebook most days, reading messages that I have sent asking him to contact me or send me his address and he's just ignoring them. It's not just me - he's ignoring his friends and family as well, and whilst we know he's alive we have no idea where he is.
I've now run up a considerable amount of debt in legal fees trying to get this sorted out and I feel like I'm no further forward at all. The next court date arrived this morning and is in early September. My tracing service are not hopeful of finding him and I just wonder how much longer this can possibly go on. I will discuss it further with my solicitor when I next see him, but his advice is very expensive and I'm starting to lose faith a little bit in the legal system. My mental health and my finances are rubbish at the moment and I just can't see an end in sight. I'm wondering if anyone has any advice or has been through anything similar (although my solicitor hasn't in all the years he's been working) and can give me any hope that this will all be over sooner rather than later.
I'm wondering if anyone here might be able to give me some advice about my current situation. I separated from my now ex husband in April last year. He moved out and I stayed in the family home with our children. At the time things were as amicable as they could have been - I lent him some money to pay for his new accommodation for a couple of months, he saw the kids regularly and he signed the divorce papers. I had set up the paperwork for a clean break order, which he had agreed to verbally, but when it came to getting this signed and witnessed he just didn't do it. I gave him the ultimatum of Christmas or I would start court proceedings to get this sorted out. I don't want anything from him - just for us to be financially separate. There is very little equity in the house and he stood to get less than £5000 once everything was split 50/50. I have been paying for the house on my own since before he went (Feb 2018) and had a mortgage offer on my own so I can afford to take on the property and pay him off.
Anyway, the situation has significantly deteriorated since this time last year. His mental health deteriorated badly and he stopped contacting me and the kids in October last year. He then lost his job, his room and his driving license in the space of a few weeks in May 2019 just as this all went to court and he spent some time in a psychiatric hospital where he was diagnosed with a personality disorder and alcohol dependency. In May the judge ordered that he complete his financial statement, which didn't happen, and we went to court again in July. The judge refused to rule and said that we had not tried hard enough to ensure that my ex husband has seen the paperwork. I have paid someone to attempt to find him but so far he hasn't come up with anything. The most annoying thing is that my ex is on Facebook most days, reading messages that I have sent asking him to contact me or send me his address and he's just ignoring them. It's not just me - he's ignoring his friends and family as well, and whilst we know he's alive we have no idea where he is.
I've now run up a considerable amount of debt in legal fees trying to get this sorted out and I feel like I'm no further forward at all. The next court date arrived this morning and is in early September. My tracing service are not hopeful of finding him and I just wonder how much longer this can possibly go on. I will discuss it further with my solicitor when I next see him, but his advice is very expensive and I'm starting to lose faith a little bit in the legal system. My mental health and my finances are rubbish at the moment and I just can't see an end in sight. I'm wondering if anyone has any advice or has been through anything similar (although my solicitor hasn't in all the years he's been working) and can give me any hope that this will all be over sooner rather than later.