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Caring Too Much

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  • Caring Too Much


    My mother had a heart attack and live but never quite recovered initially my brother and sister helped. Then all but one said that it was too much a I was left looking after my mother and my son who was not even one. To cut a long story short I have looked after my mother (who was diagnosed with dementia - hard work) until she died. Then my sister was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and died after 5 years fighting.

    When my sister passed her daughter was only 16 and has special needs . In my sisters WILL she had not changed my status as Guardian so she came to live with me and now at 22 I am just so tired.
    When we were younger my sister and I purchase property together and her half of that was left to her daughter and held in Trust but other until she turned 21.

    I have wanted to sell the property as I have been told I am liable for paying half of the Council Tax despite my nieces Trustees refusing to allow a sale.

    As I purchased property elsewhere when I was working I am not happy as money is tight and my niece only gets Lower PIP once a month and from that I have to deduct her weekly travel mobile phone charges and her personal care and hygiene.
    There is under 20 left a week to help with running the house and I usually end up doing without.

    I had my niece sign a Tenancy Agreement and she was advised by one of my sisters long term friends that the agreement was more than fair but that it was a month by month and that I could ask her to leave or change the terms as long as it was in writing and that if she needed any advise on this matter in the future she would be happy to help.

    I found out that as I was my nieces Full Time Carer I was entitled to claim for an additional exemption on my Council Tax on the property that s my main home. I want to sell the other property but my niece is refusing as she says that once I finish helping her how to look after herself that she will be moving back into the property that we jointly own.

    The thing is she is not paying any Council Tax on that property only I am because she has NO money coming in. She was supposed to have submitted an application for Universal Credit with the help of my sisters friend so I thought that she was only waiting for a reply. It turns out that they never completed the application and now she has to reapply.

    I have already given my niece notice to leave last September but she was told not to leave as how was she going to live even though I said I would still be her Carer but she would just not be living in my house.

    I want to know the following. My niece would like to live at the other property for 4 days and come back and stay with me for the other three will I still be liable for Council Tax on the property if only she is living in it. Will I loose my Carers Discount on the property where I do live and own. How can I get additional help for her for the future.

    As my niece has special needs can she apply to the Council for an Exemption under Class I ( A property is left empty because the resident is living elsewhere in order to receive personal care or Class U (A property occupied only by a severely mentally impaired.

    I am getting older as is my own child and I have had no support what so ever.

    I even asked about my sister Pension and the Executors told me that it was not my concern and they refused to give me any money to help with the up keep of my niece and I really am just so tired of doing without that I am even thinking of changing the locks on my house so that my niece HAS to go and live in the other property because I really am tired of being left with all the responsibility of other people.

    If my child was not still in education then the money coming things would be worse. That upsets me as they have had to do without

    PLEASE CAN SOMEONE ADVISE ME WHAT CAN I DO because I am at breaking point. I was seeing a therapist until they left the practice and have not been replace my doctor has put my on anti-Depression tablets.

    Sorry for the long post but its all just too much. I really want out.

    Many thanks
    Tags: None

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