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Hi,
I think my situation is somewhat unique......
I have a 14 year old daughter with an unreliable father.....she wants a relationship with him but more structure - he will make an arrangement with her ie: I will pick you up at 4pm Friday - this changes to 6pm, then to 8pm then to 9am the next day and then maybe not turn up at all (sometimes he does / sometimes he doesnt)
This constant - my daughter doesnt know whether she is coming or going - cannot make arrangements with friend because 'dad said he's coming' and 9/10 times is dissapointed.
He will not make arrangements through me, so I cannot filter what my daughter does/doesnt know - says it's nothing to do with me and goes straight to my daughter making promises he doesnt keep.
I have now change her phone number after a particulalry upsetting birthday (4pm on day of birthday - held up 6pm - still cant, tomorrow morning, still nothing, ended up 7pm the next day - she sat around waiting instead of seeing friends which was heartbreaking). This resulted in lots of tears and 'i just want dad to be normal'.
I have tried to arrange mediation - refuses to communicate with them and I am now at the point where I feel court is the only option but not sure what can be done in this situation.
He also refuses to pay any child support - if he does pay anything which is very sporadic, it's a tool to manipulate 'let me speak to my daughter and I'll pay you etc etc'
Cannot do this on my own any more - now I have blocked him from having unfiltered access to our daughter the phone calls/texts from him are intense and manipulative. My daughter can call him whenever she chooses, i felt she needed a break from the continual dissapointment and the cycle of arranging/rearranging etc, but her words were 'what's the point'. She wants to see her dad, it doesnt matter when as long as he turns up when he says he will and she can rely on him to be there.
I think my situation is somewhat unique......
I have a 14 year old daughter with an unreliable father.....she wants a relationship with him but more structure - he will make an arrangement with her ie: I will pick you up at 4pm Friday - this changes to 6pm, then to 8pm then to 9am the next day and then maybe not turn up at all (sometimes he does / sometimes he doesnt)
This constant - my daughter doesnt know whether she is coming or going - cannot make arrangements with friend because 'dad said he's coming' and 9/10 times is dissapointed.
He will not make arrangements through me, so I cannot filter what my daughter does/doesnt know - says it's nothing to do with me and goes straight to my daughter making promises he doesnt keep.
I have now change her phone number after a particulalry upsetting birthday (4pm on day of birthday - held up 6pm - still cant, tomorrow morning, still nothing, ended up 7pm the next day - she sat around waiting instead of seeing friends which was heartbreaking). This resulted in lots of tears and 'i just want dad to be normal'.
I have tried to arrange mediation - refuses to communicate with them and I am now at the point where I feel court is the only option but not sure what can be done in this situation.
He also refuses to pay any child support - if he does pay anything which is very sporadic, it's a tool to manipulate 'let me speak to my daughter and I'll pay you etc etc'
Cannot do this on my own any more - now I have blocked him from having unfiltered access to our daughter the phone calls/texts from him are intense and manipulative. My daughter can call him whenever she chooses, i felt she needed a break from the continual dissapointment and the cycle of arranging/rearranging etc, but her words were 'what's the point'. She wants to see her dad, it doesnt matter when as long as he turns up when he says he will and she can rely on him to be there.
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