Where do I stand?

[T98]

Hi
I wanted a bit of advice regarding where I stand in my situation.
So me and my partner met in 2010. I was going through a divorce with my husband and he was with his wife.
We got together, things moved quickly he proposed within 3 months. We knew we wanted to be with each other.
Before we got married he wanted to get a pre-nup done, as he was cheated on with his wife who he met from school, had 2 children with, he had trust issues, and felt what ever he's achieved so far for his kids he wants to protect. I totally agreed with it as I would do the same if I had as much as he did.
Anyway fast forward 4 years on from our marriage and 6 years together, it's bothering me now as, I moved in with him in the family home. I sold my house which I had with my ex-husband and made nothing from it, then I was renting through the council, which I could have bought at a later date had I been single. But as I wasn't I gave it up to give that opportunity to someone else who needed it.
He pays the mortgage and the bills as he earns a lot more than me. He had to remortgage to pay his ex off.
I told him after we got married I need to contribute and he just says you save for the kids, I can manage the bills & mortgage.
I did mention I wanted my name on the mortgage a few years ago when we had a argument, he said its long winded etc. I left it.
The pre-nup says anything before marriage is ours individually but once we get married from that point onwards it's both of ours.
He always says the house we live in will in the end go to his son.
My 2 children live with their dad, not with us.
So what happens in the future when I'm not here, what do my children get?
I've contributed to the house to make it a home, I do everything in the house.
I don't pay for repairs etc as I don't earn as much as him. And I feel why should I if my kids are not going to gain anything.
My name is not on any title deeds or mortgage.
Not sure what to do or how to approach this.

[charitynjw]

Re: Where do I stand?

This may be of interest (posted for info only.....I don't know nor do I have any beneficial interests in the linked site or contents)

http://www.sheppersonssolicitors.com...greements.html

Prenuptial Agreements

What is a Prenuptial Agreement?

Prior to getting married, a prenuptial agreement is a formal agreement which sets out how a couple’s assets will be divided in the event of them divorcing or separating.
In many cases prenuptial agreements are sought where one partner has substantial wealth prior to the marriage, and seeks to protect that wealth in the event of the marriage failing.


Is a Prenuptial Agreement legally binding in England?

Prenuptial agreements are not currently legally binding in England. However, a Judge is likely to take a prenuptial agreement into account when overseeing a case and is likely to uphold it, as long as certain safeguards have been met.
Recent cases show that prenuptial agreements are being upheld in many instances. For a prenuptial agreement to be upheld, the following safeguards must be met:

• The husband and the wife both received independent legal advice about the agreement at the outset.
• Full and frank financial disclosure of both parties’ assets was made prior to the agreement. Assets were not hidden.
• The agreement must not be entered into less than 21 days before the marriage.
• Neither party was under pressure or duress to sign the agreement against their will.
• There has been no significant change which would make the agreement inappropriate (for example, the birth of children).
• The agreement has to be fair and realistic. If the division of assets is weighted too heavily in the favour of one party, it may be judged to be unfair by the courts.
• Prenuptial agreements should be reviewed and amended during the course of the marriage, particularly when any child or children are born and periodically in any event.

If the above safeguards are not met the prenuptial agreement is unlikely to be upheld by the courts.
When entering a prenuptial agreement each party must carefully consider future eventualities that could impact on the fairness of an agreement made between a couple who are about to marry, such as one having to give up a career to bring up children, the marriage lasting many years or more or future business ventures together. There are many possibilities.

[T98]

Re: Where do I stand?

Thank you for that information.
What I wanted to know is ok we have done a pre-nup where the marital home is one of his assets, so what happens on the equity on the house since we got married?
Because this is my marital home.
Do I have any entitlement to that, if we seperate or on death, going to my children.
As this was one of his assets on pre-nup can I request that I want my name on title deeds & mortgage?
I have no bills in my name either.
I feel like I've shot myself in the foot by agreeing with the pre-nup.
I came into the marriage with nothing as I had a divorce and my ex declared he had nothing. Sold our home with nothing owed to us.
I had a council property which I was renting and I could have had a right to buy it, but I gave that up to be with him.
So in reality I have nothing to my name, then that makes me think why am I in the marriage?
I'm not a materialistic person but as a parent you want to build to leave things for your children.
I feel like he's got best of both worlds where he's protected his assets, and he's married and has a happy home life with me cooking, cleaning after him and his kids. Mine live with their dad.
Just confused on how to tackle this situation.

[Amethyst]

Re: Where do I stand?

The pre-nup says anything before marriage is ours individually but once we get married from that point onwards it's both of ours.

Kind of defeats the object of a pre-nup - think we need to see the exact terms.

[Openlaw15]

Re: Where do I stand?

Hi
I wanted a bit of advice regarding where I stand in my situation.
So me and my partner met in 2010. I was going through a divorce with my husband and he was with his wife.
We got together, things moved quickly he proposed within 3 months. We knew we wanted to be with each other.
Before we got married he wanted to get a pre-nup done, as he was cheated on with his wife who he met from school, had 2 children with, he had trust issues, and felt what ever he's achieved so far for his kids he wants to protect. I totally agreed with it as I would do the same if I had as much as he did.
Anyway fast forward 4 years on from our marriage and 6 years together, it's bothering me now as, I moved in with him in the family home. I sold my house which I had with my ex-husband and made nothing from it, then I was renting through the council, which I could have bought at a later date had I been single. But as I wasn't I gave it up to give that opportunity to someone else who needed it.
He pays the mortgage and the bills as he earns a lot more than me. He had to remortgage to pay his ex off.
I told him after we got married I need to contribute and he just says you save for the kids, I can manage the bills & mortgage.
I did mention I wanted my name on the mortgage a few years ago when we had a argument, he said its long winded etc. I left it.
The pre-nup says anything before marriage is ours individually but once we get married from that point onwards it's both of ours.
He always says the house we live in will in the end go to his son.
My 2 children live with their dad, not with us.
So what happens in the future when I'm not here, what do my children get?
I've contributed to the house to make it a home, I do everything in the house.
I don't pay for repairs etc as I don't earn as much as him. And I feel why should I if my kids are not going to gain anything.
My name is not on any title deeds or mortgage.
Not sure what to do or how to approach this.

The Pre-nup as far as the property is concerned, as Amethyst says above, is rather pointless if you will at some point acquire an interest in it any way. This guy is rather crafty though as he has the property in his name and paying the mortgage and all the bills. Tell him you want to go on the mortgage as if you don't it will be difficult for you if you do divorce. Tell him thanks for looking out for you, but you also want to pay towards the bills and upkeep of the property. If he has his name on the deeds you'd acquire beneficial rights (an interest in the property) but these are not automatic. For instance if you held a joint tenancy (own together) the property would pass to the surviving spouse on death. If you had a tenancy in common (separate ownership), but you died, your share would pass via your will, ie to your children. With you being married to him for 6 years you will benefit an interest one way or another automatically as the law is generally 50/ 50 split. The onus is on him to prove that you agreed to the pre nupt, even though the courts do take a dim view of pre nups. Was the pre nup in writing, did you have legal intention (ie intend to be legally bound)?

[T98]

Re: Where do I stand?

I feel there is no point putting my name on the mortgage and paying bills etc if my children don't get anything once I'm gone. Then I would rather just save for my children coz he has sorted his kids out. Value of house was £650 000 when we got married now it's £715 000. He's protected his assets if we were to seperate or divorce.