Married but separated: is it adultery?

[Golfing Girl]

Hello,
I am married but 18 months separated and my estranged husband has found a new girlfriend. I was waiting for a 2 year with consent divorce, but could I divorce now, for adultery? It would get this over and done with sooner. Looking for any guidance to explore my options, thanks Golfing Girl

[leclerc]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

Personally, I would wait the 6 months to be honest because it might be better to have the divorce as an amicable conclusion to the marriage rather then necessarily creating an issue that might become unpleasant.

I'd wait for further advice btw.

[Celestine]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

The cost difference between a 'consent divorce' v a 'contentious divorce' could be prohibitive. The only way this could work would be if your ex was happy to be divorced on the grounds of his adultery?

[enquirer]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

Is your ex in 'lurve' with his new squeeze? If so, then as Celestine suggests, you may be able to play on this and get him to agree to adultery.

[taigameha]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

I think you should wait for enough time to divorce rather than divorce adultery to be so much going offensive. Wish you happy later :tinysmile_grin_t:

[Golfing Girl]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

Thanks for the replies - costs are a major consideration so I'll have to think about it more before making a decision. Also, I doubt he would agree to adultery without a fight (and I can't be bothered with that).

[basa48]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

You might also consider the new girlfriend may not wish to be named in an adulterous divorce.

[MissFM]

Re: Married but separated: is it adultery?

You might also consider the new girlfriend may not wish to be named in an adulterous divorce.

You actually don't have to name a co-respondent these days - you can just say (eg) "a woman".

Golfing Girl - does your husband want to be divorced too?

If so, it's quite possible to come to an agreement to do it quickly - most grounds just boil down to "irretrievable breakdown", which can be because of adultery, or unreasonable behaviour, or desertion etc.. There are various formulations that the courts will accept as proper grounds and I defy even the "happily" married not to be able to come up with examples of what the courts would accept as "unreasonable behaviour" in a spouse.

See here: https://www.gov.uk/divorce/grounds-for-divorce

and here: http://www.divorceaid.co.uk/legal/process.htm

None of it's made public (unless you're "celebs") and the grounds don't affect either the financial settlement or the arrangements for any children.

If you use a solicitor, make sure they are Resolution accredited:

http://www.resolution.org.uk/

and try to agree as much as possible between the two of you beforehand in as co-operative a spirit as possible. By far the greatest costs are incurred by couples using solicitors to score points against each other which are anyway irrelevant to the outcome.

Good luck. x