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Caught in financial trap

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  • Caught in financial trap

    I am stuck in a difficult situation which I believe is not being helped by my Ex's solicitor.
    Just over a year ago without warning my wife left the marital home, she told her best friend I had done nothing wrong just something she had to do.
    We have gone through a number issues along the way since and had better periods. She claimed at the time she just wanted her fair share of equity from the house but did not want me to lose it.
    I for my part said I would look to raise money from my pension to pay her off when I reached 55 which I have now done.
    At the time she told me she didn't want me to pay her costs, maintenance or for us to go after each other's pensions. This however is not what her solicitor is saying, he wants me to pay her costs, pay her maintenance even though we don't have children together and is claiming she is entitled to a share of all my pensions even those from employment during the 21 years I earned before we were married.
    I did intially employ a solicitor but when I got a bill for £1500 +vat for one 45 min meeting, 6 emails and 2 letters it became clear I could not afford to keep doing this so had to dispense with his services. Now he said she was not entitled to these previous pensions.
    I am now told by a financial advice company that I cannot draw down any money from my pensions until I have the absolute (I have a nisi) but I cannot get an absolute without a financial agreement so am basically stuck.
    I don't want to get into having to start taking out more loans as I have been left with a lot of debt and I don't want to remortgage as I only have 4 years left to pay off the house and I have a physical impairment which is getting worse so don't want to take on such a commitment and force myself to work for many more years.
    Can anyone suggest firstly if the issues relating to her right to claim on pensions before we were married are correct?
    And if there is a way I can get around the issue of not being able to draw any monies down from my pensions whilst I don't have an Absolute?
    I have no faith in her solicitor giving fair or reasonable advice, he is NOT a family law specialist is instead a commercial litigation specialist and seems only interested in the money aspects and getting as much as possible out of me as he has apparently entered into an agreement with my Ex where he gets a share of the settlement when completed, this she told me when we were on talking terms.
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